Your “It’s A Little Early To Be Broke, Ain’t It?” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • The main story of the day is that February 19 marks the opening of the two-week Franchise Tag window.
    • As we learned with Le’Veon Bell, a team & player have until July 15 to negotiate a multi-year deal, or the player has to sign a one-year deal under the tag & salary table.
      • If they don’t sign either by Week 10, they must sit out the season.
  • The Jags picked up the option year on Calais Campbell.
    • Doing so will earn Campbell $12 million for 2019.
    • They had to make the decision by Wednesday, because Campbell was due a $3 million salary bonus.
  • It’s only been two weeks, but broadcast partner CBS has come out with their AAF “power rankings“.
    • This is on the heels of a Deadspin report claiming the AAF needed a $250 million investment to keep going until the end of the season.
      • They were bailed out by new League chairman & Carolina Hurricanes owner Tom Dundon.
      • But to hear the League talk about it, it was an “accelerated investment” that had been planned for later but was moved up due to solid business strategy.
    • Based on the attendance in Memphis, they will need it.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Penguins at Devils – 7:00Pm | Sportsnet
    • Maple Leafs at Blues – 8:00PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet Ontario
  • NBA: last day of the All-Star break
  • NCAA:
    • Nebraska at Penn State – 7:00PM | FS1
    • Purdue at Indiana – 7:00PM | ESPN2
    • Vanderbilt at Tennessee – 7:00PM | ESPN
    • Wake Forest at Notre Dame – 7:00PM | ESPNU
    • Kentucky at Missouri – 9:00PM | ESPN
    • Baylor at Iowa State – 9:00PM | ESPN2
    • Florida State at Clemson – 9:00PM | ESPNU
  • WWE:
    • Smackdown – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • If you didn’t see it, the Elimination Chamber main event was unreal. The show will be addressing that.

I want to thank Balls for covering last night’s thread. A three-day weekend meant enjoying the sights of Vancouver on a rare sunny February day.

WORTH IT!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

The good news is that attendance can only go up, right?

Brick Meathook

This is actually kinda’ scary:
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Brick Meathook

I’d probably follow the AAF if I could only see it. I gave up my 9000 channel DirecTV a while a back and do DirecTV NOW streaming, and there’s no NFL Network even if I wanted to pay for it. Can’t get that other channel either. The AAF is low-rent semi-pro football so maybe they should put it on broadcast TV and try to reach the unwashed hoi-polloi like me who are their natural customer base. My digital antenna picks up a dozen local Vietnamese channels, I’m sure the AAF could afford to buy some time on one of those.

Fronkenshteen

Trump will win in 2020 because the dems will destroy each other. This field looks like the kentucky fucking derby. They’re gonna cut each other to pieces.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

OMG YOU GUYS TONIGHT’S EPISODE OF TEMPTATION ISLAND IS AWESOME!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Why are you watching that stupid shit?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

Have you not been reading my recaps?!? Where have you been?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

two-week Franchise Tag window. .….. ….. …

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Wakezilla

Just finished reading The Wars by Findley. It’s told in first, second and third person and is about this Canadian in World War I who is an unlikeable, most likely bi-sexual incel who goes thru World War I until things get a little too hot to handle (His face gets burned off after he steals 100 horses and kills 2 officers after he goes insane, resulting in a group of soldiers lighting a barn on fire, with the guy inside).

Anyway, one thing I learned from this mostly true biography is that the Krauts were the least of the worries for soldiers.

1/5, hard pass

theeWeeBabySeamus

Sooooo…. Scotchnaut wrote a biography?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

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blackroseMD1

Say what you will about the Chargers, but their social media team is pretty damn good.
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Also, fuck Dean Spanos.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Walked in on my son and his friend playing Fortnite. Friend is in college, they’re on the phone. Son is bitching that the game is lagging.

Friend: Tell your dad to get off porn.

Me: It’s the only way I can keep in touch with your Mom.

Friend: Hey! Don’t talk about my Mom!

Me: Oh, we don’t talk.

Friend:

SonOfSpam

Also would’ve accepted “Don’t worry, she’s too polite to talk with her mouth full.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

When I saw “Walked in on my son and his friend…” I thought this was going a very different direction.

SonOfSpam

I know, SO disappointed.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

2-nil WOO!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

You will never see a U-Haul behind a hearse.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uM-MqsWjQd4

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Warthog

No gauntlet left on the ground.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You CAN take it with you.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I need to find a way to send this to Denzel.
LMFAO

scotchnaut

Joe Jackson just whispered in my ear-he was curious as to whether there was some other half-decent piano ‘solo’ from the 80’s was available. I tried my best…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bErFXjUGvQ

Brick Meathook

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rockingdog
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Cut me, Mick.

SonOfSpam

I learned the hard way not to quote “Rocky” in a Dublin pub.

herodotus450

Nor while in the presence of Adrian Peterson and a tree.

Brick Meathook

They eventually make up:

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Brick Meathook

Until . . .
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Brick Meathook

whoaaaa . . .
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Brick Meathook

(NOTE: I found these searching for Apollo spacecraft images)

herodotus450

Ivan Drago: “Ima turn you into a vegetable Carl Weathers, then I’ll get a stew going baby.”

Horatio Cornblower

Well, Drago did send him through space and, presumably, into another world.

scotchnaut

Most likely mentioned this at one time-Dad and I went to see this movie and we were both so emotionally drained we didn’t say anything to each other for the longest time during the drive home.

Dad: “That… that was a great movie.”

Me: “Yeah…”

[more silence]

I loved boxing because he loved boxing and neither of us had ever seen anything like this movie before. It was 1976 and it floored the both of us…

I remember being sick as a dog one time as a kid and he came by to make sure I was okay. He eventually told me about the greatness of Carlos Monzon. (87-3-9) Why? [shrugs shoulders]

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I have been asked by work to lead an hour training session for the team in Asia starting in about 15 minutes. I just opened a beer and they’re about to get completely unfiltered Low Commander about 10 minutes in.

Best case scenario, they don’t ask me to do this again.

scotchnaut

If you don’t start the thingy with this…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDpPoytXVvo

Ian Scott McCormick

Explain that while D’Angelo Russell made the all star team, the Nets primary playmaker should probably be Caris LeVert going forward.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I’ll make sure to pepper that in.

SonOfSpam

Do the Hines Ward thing. THEY’LL LOVE IT.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

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Horatio Cornblower

But do it in a Bill Parcells voice!!

scotchnaut

From what I’ve seen it’s like the 80’s NFL. It’s quite sloppy as far as execution is concerned. D guys can tackle/hit as they see fit and are not flagged, wr’s are not running tight routes, there’s a play-it-safe reliance on the running game and the starting qb’s haven’t yet learned to run thru their progressions on pass plays. It’s a throwback league that hasn’t yet identified itself in those terms.

King Hippo

Lack of QB talent is always the killer.

theeWeeBabySeamus

So when the Phils sign Bryce Harper next, and both still finish in the basement?

Gratliff

A solid team consisting of a $300 million superstar and the finest volunteers in Delaware County

BaldingSpiritually

Over/Under comparisons to A-Rod in Texas is set for 20 games

King Hippo

this a fine new handle, BS

Ian Scott McCormick

I don’t know if this is a controversial take, but Machado is the better player and probably should have made more money. But Harper will surpass his $300MM. Despite, you know, not being as good.

Horatio Cornblower

He doesn’t have as much melanin as Machado, so he’s got that going for him.

Gratliff

Tampa Bay is a goddamn machine

King Hippo

that explains teh smell

Sharkbait

I thought that was the MRSA

Ian Scott McCormick

I’m going back down to Tampa in a little more than two weeks for a wedding between people in their mid 60’s. I think it’s a biker wedding, so I’m thinking I don’t really have to shop for a new suit jacket. In the words of Hobson, I’ll just steal something nice.

King Hippo

I also placed a wager tonite on sommet called Independiente de La Chorrera, solely because they are playing Toronto FC and MLS sucks rhino balls.

1-nil to the good so far! 😀

King Hippo

Why do these chucklefucks keep thinking “alternative” football leagues (made up of what the Brits would call “pub sides”) are ever going to be a worthwhile investment?

I mean, it’s almost as dumb as plowing your life savings (mental note – what are savings??) into opening a restaurant.

Ian Scott McCormick

Canada’s too deep in to give up now.

litre_cola

It amazes me how successful the CFL has become, except in Toronto. The league was bleeding money 15 years ago and looked fucked.

rockingdog

found a funny:
My wife is away all week so I’m following pop culture law and serving my kids still-frozen pizza and bowls of refined sugar, with cheap whiskey in Dixie Cups. We’re all wearing burlap sacks and I’m hoping the flooding dishwasher will put the fires out. The dog has a gun.

King Hippo

as is his 2nd Amendment rite!!!1111

Redshirt

They need to improve their attendance though. Its a bit sad.

Also, they almost missed payroll after Week 1. Not a good sign.

Gratliff

It’s funny you say that, because much like indie wrestlers, the players probably aren’t getting paid at the end of it all

Redshirt

https://fitzlab.shinyapps.io/cityapp/

Thanks to Global Warming, in 2080, Cincinnati would only be 6.5° warmer (86°+6°=93°) plus be 4.6% dryer in the summer?

Someone please talk me down because I’m tempted to root for the bad guys.

rockingdog

SOoooooo psyched for my PADRES!!!!
Signed Machado!!!! Nice!
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litre_cola

I think Low Commander has exploded.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Oh I exploded alright, but in a different way…

Redshirt

(sigh)

I’ll get the Wet-Dry Vac.

Horatio Cornblower

Get three, and send Machado the bill.

SonOfSpam

Haven’t been this excited to see Machado locally since Andy Dick played the role of Nanki-Poo!

King Hippo

the proper terminology, I am told, is Dirt BOLTMEN!

Gratliff

Flyers got within striking distance of a playoff berth, so now it’s time for the traditional “Give up 10 goals so you remember who you root for” game

Gratliff

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand Couturier gets hurt immediately to start the second

scotchnaut

There be a couple of low-key Senators fans at me workplace. I walked in this morning saying, ‘did you know that the Sens scored 7 goals last night’?

Both of them: [in a resigned voice, at separate times] “I’m guessing the other team scored eight?”

Me: “FUCK!”

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

YA BETTER ASK SOME MANNNNNNNNNYYYYYY!!!

(Yeah, that’s the best I could come up with.)

rockingdog

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yeah right

Press conference I want to see:

Reporter: “So Manny, why San Diego? You had plenty of options out there that this seems a little odd.

Machado: “Well, actually I used to be a San Diego Chargers fan and when I saw how badly the Spanos family fucked over San Diego fans I just decided to come here and help start building the championship team that this great city deserves.”

SonOfSpam

“Also,..fish tacos.”

rockingdog

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rockingdog

OMG if he actually said that that would be orgasmic!!! LOL!!!

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

That would be epic.

However, I will very much settle just for him to NOT MENTION THE WEATHER.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey, well at least the Orioles are going to be better next year.

Ron Howard voiceover: They weren’t.

blackroseMD1

I honestly thought I was still drunk when I saw the numbers.

Never would have thought that the Padres, of all teams, would hand out the largest free agent contract of all time (for now). Definitely going to go to a few more games this year, especially after Tatis and Urias are called up.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ooooh, that’s perrty.
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scotchnaut

Your tugboat fetish is safe with me, Pervy McPervert.*

*did you hear about tWBS’s rebound relationship?

theeWeeBabySeamus

*which one?

scotchnaut

The one that involved Sheila Mc#Overshare.