Your Official 2017/18 New York Football Giants Season Preview

So many things to talk about! Many of which are of absolutely no interest to non-fans of the team. I’ll try to walk the line between ‘pure detritus’ and ‘so incredibly salient my nipples are erect’. Here goes…

Last Year200 million dollar spending sprees that retain/bring on board talent rarely work out as well as they did for the Giants. Having survived the “CLEAN THE HOUSE! FIRE THE COACH AND GM!” word-cacophony in the media and online, Jerry Reese kept Pierre-Paul and hauled in cb Jenkins, dt Harrison and de Vernon and oh my, what a difference. Maybe it was the new strength/conditioning program that de-emphasized bulk and adding weight for its own sake and focused instead on fitness, flexibility and optimum athleticism. Perhaps it was a lack of full contact practices on Mondays directly after games. Perchance it was a new coaching staff willing to let younger guys onto the field much earlier than would have occurred in years previous. It may have been a fresh breeze wafting over and through the organization as a whole. If a team leads the league in games-lost to injury two years in a row that’s a coincidence. If it does so for three years running, that’s a goddamn travesty. Goodbye 6-10, hello 11-5.

Fresh Meat: Brandon Marshall did his time in NFL purgatory (well, one of a few purgatories anyway) last year with the Jets and predictably struggled. At 33 he shouldn’t be the focus of any team’s passing game and he fits in quite nicely here. His role will be the possession/red zone guy and he’ll never see a double-team with Beckham Jr. on the field. I expect a bounce-back to just below his 2015 All-Pro year. The team hasn’t had a difference-maker at the tight end spot since…Jeremy Shockey? I guess. That was rectified in the first round with the selection of Evan Engram. This 6’3″, 240 lb. 4.42/40 guy was a four year starter at Ole Miss, has good hands and runs polished routes. He’s the typical “too big for cornerbacks, too fast for linebackers” walking mismatch that will allow the offense to work more effectively.

The heart of the Giants defense-the defensive line-was reinforced by the selection of Dalvin Tomlinson of Alabama. The coaching staff was blown away by the young man’s mien during the interview process and took note of his team-first attitude and how that manifested itself during his time at Alabama. Despite being perfectly capable of busting up the middle of the offensive line and running down QB’s he was tasked with occupying the middle/being double-teamed so that linebackers and ends could chase down the ball.

Coaching/The Awful O: Rook coach Steve (“Spags”, duh) Spagnuolo and his over-sized pictures-only kid’s menu took a lot of heat last year and some of it was deserved. I thought “new regime, no more boring/see it coming from a mile away tendencies” and I got that one wrong, wrong, wrong. I’ve never mentioned it before but that habit of running between the tackles on first down, every first down drives me bananas. When Coughlin did it I understood that he was employing his clock-chewing, grind it out, win with defense philosophy. Fine. But Spags, you were going to let what’s left of your hair down and up-tempo the shit out of the O! In retrospect I may have been blindingly stupid. The new coach was gifted/had dumped in his lap all the parts of a slow-moving, win-with-brute-force unit that hadn’t won 50% of their total games going back to 2009. (I think they did sneak in a championship that one year when they finished 2 games over .500 though) So yeah, his hands were tied a little. The O-line was wonky at best, forcing Eli to make extremely quick throws to a.) tight ends that hadn’t started their routes yet, 2.) “shell of his former self” Victor Cruz, 3.) triple-covered OBJ.

So….what’s different this year? The O-line hasn’t been upgraded but it’s fairly stable and should be mildly better than last year. HUZZAH! for slight improvement. The difference is at the skill positions-Perkins will take over as the lead back. Rashad Jennings and his lead-lined legs managed to finish 40th out of the 42 rb’s that carried the ball at least 100 times last year in terms of efficiency. Perkins gradually took over and behind the very same blockers was 26th in the same category as a rookie. With the upgrades of Marshall, Engram and Shepard alongside OBJ I expect that opposing defenses might actually play on their heels a bit instead of the usual ears pinned back.

Nasty D: The defense that was ranked 20th in 2015 made the leap to #2 overall and barring serious injury should maintain a top ten status…maybe. (refer to thoughts about the schedule below) The ability to create pressure, whether it’s from the middle (Harrison, Bromley) or the ends (JPP, Vernon) or, as tended to happen quite a bit last year, both at the same time, is obviously disruptive. The Giants last two Super Bowl wins couldn’t have happened without rushing or sacking Brady on an on-going basis. This team does that. Supplementing this pressure is a secondary that has, according to Pro Football Focus, the 4th ranked (Rogers-Cromartie) and 8th ranked (Jenkins) cb’s in the league. Landon Collins’ second year with the club resulted in Defensive Player of the Year chatter. Shall we add in the second-ranked rookie cb (Eli Apple), second year safeties Darian Thompson and Andrew Adams? Let’s. The only weak spot is the linebacker crew but they’ve all been asked to shed weight so that their quickness is maximized. So, glass half full there.

You’re Not Helping: The fucking schedule. It’s a killer. Dallas twice. (once without Elliott, I think) The Broncos, Seahawks, Chiefs, Raiders and the usual division challenges. No cupcakes as far as the eye can see. The Rams, Chiefs, Seahawks and Broncos are all coming off their bye weeks, bye the bye. Ugh! The only advantage that I can see is that three of the last four to finish out are at home and in the division.

Outlook: The team is going to be better than it was last year-that I’m sure of. Will it have a better record than last year? No. That I’m sure of as well. The D will continue to tighten the screws and the O will score more than the paltry 19 they averaged last year. You want a prediction, don’t you? [exhales long breath] Okaaaayyyyy. 10-6. If that gets them into the playoffs they will get to the NFC Championship game at the very least. If they can just get in…

 

 

 

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Horatio Cornblower

I think the Giants are maybe one year away from putting it together. And I’m not sure how much to trust Eli.

Or I could just be too used to too much bad NFC football and not bright enough to recognize that they might all be getting better, other than Washington.

litre_cola

Giants will win the division cuz the Cowboys will take a step back and the Iggles gunna Iggles.

King Hippo

This will indeed be an interesting side to watch. If they just open up that offense a bit, could have all the ingredients. I shrieked in terror when they drafted Engram, love that dude. Wanted the Donks to take him instead of that mentally challenged LT.

King Hippo

Jelly? SO JELLY

/been about 10-12 years for me, Morrissey was the last

blaxabbath

One of my favorite Quotables from last year:

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“Who took away his dog?” -BrettFavresColonoscopy

Unsurprised

Here you go.

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blaxabbath

I need a library of these….

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This was great but I’m deducting a point for your failure to refer to JPP as Zoidberg.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

“But Moooommmmmmm, it’s a cartoon AND takes place in New York! And it’s got robots, just like Peyton!”

–Eli Manning, desperately trying to convince Olivia to let him watch Futurama

Beastmode Ate My Baby

“The O-line hasn’t been upgraded but it’s fairly stable and should be mildly better than last year. HUZZAH! for slight improvement. “

You don’t mind if I steal this for the Seahawks preview, do you?

Don T

I got the perfect pic here
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nomonkeyfun

The Gints will be incredibly frustrating this year.

http://i1.ytimg.com/sh/dWudysMis9w/showposter.jpg?v=4f0e5f16

Don T

Geno Smith 2017 over / unders (articles in NY media):
Articles with “mature”: 5
“Immature”: 6
“Better option than Eli”: 10
“Should be cut”: 20

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[moves to pinch Bob Costas’ nipples]

[frowns]

[sighs]

– Jason Pierre-Paul