Listen all! This is the truth of it. Fighting leads to killing, and killing gets to warring. And that was damn near the death of us all. Look at us now! Busted up, and everyone talking about COVID Variants! But we've learned, by the dust of them all... DFO learned.
Preseason Football Sucks
Euro Semifinal numero Uno!
Football’s Sh***iest Cosplay: Your 2020 Detroit Lions Season Preview
New Orleans Saints Season Preview: A DJ TAJ Joint
A Feast of Crow: 2020 San Francisco 49ers Preview
I Can See Cleeeeeaarrrly Now, Tom Braaaaady’s Gone: 2020 Buffalo Bills Season Preview
[Author's Note: Despite the overwhelmingly positive response to last year's All Interpretive Dance team preview, I have decided not to go back to that well a second year in a row. Try to contain your disappointment.] So here it is. It's finally happening. Like Christmas morning, high school graduation and losing
Hate Week 2020 Retrospective: Revisiting My Disasterous 49ers Preview
Welcome, everyone- it's Hate Week 2020 at DFO! It is my third-favorite time of the football year, trailing only Draftsmas Eve and P*triots Schadenfreude Day. Hate Will See Us Through. And there are so many, many things I loathe with a great and abiding passion. The P*triots. Alt-Nazis. People who don't pronounce
Pissing Up God’s Flagpole: Your 2019 Detroit Lions Preview
[Author's Note: So this is it. The End. The final preview before the NFL meat grinder spins up to turn convert the bodies of healthy(ish) young men into Entertainment. Après moi le déluge de merde. Get hype.] Wyandotte. Shit. I'm only in Wyandotte. Every time, I think I'm going to wake up back in Midtown.... Everyone
Why I Won’t Be Watching The NFL This Year: Your 2019 Homeless Raiders Season Preview
Love me them uprights. Eagles Preview
I have gathered the DFO luminaries Gratliff and WhyEaglesWhy to assist me in breaking down the coming season. Q - How was your summer? Gratliff: I have not seen a sporting event I care about since the Flyers were eliminated in mid-March. I want to die. WhyEaglesWhy: WELL ACTUALLY, it’s winter here in the Land
Tripping Over The Light Fantastic; or A Desperate Plié: Your All-Dancing 2019 Buffalo Bills Season Preview
[Author's Note: As promised/threatened, this year's Buffalo Bills Season Preview will be conducted in the medium of interpretive dance. Yes, I know it's particularly inappropriate for Buffalo, which has no cheerleaders but a thriving post-angioplasty community. Expand your minds and get some culture, you barbarian savages.] Your 2018 Buffalo Bills: 6-10,
Your 2019 Seattle Seahawks Preview
Rainy City Football Chums Walkthrough Here we are at the beginning of another new season and lo, what promise it holds. More replays! Endless delays! And despite all this, many missed calls. Makes you wonder why you sat and watched three idiots blathering in a booth about a microscopic difference in