DonT has passed me the baton, which I shall pass back for SNF. Apparently, this is “broadcaster experiment” week at The Shield, with both CBS and Fox putting on doubleheaders (so all kickoffs are 4:25, instead of the typical split with 4:05). What a time to be alive.
Fat Humps (+4.5) at Donks (4:25, CBS)
Seven-seed tiebreaker implications ahoy! Denver also soon travels to WKRP broadcast range for a head-to-head with the other possible 7. I think I speak for all the 2-seed hopefuls out there that they’d all rather play Indy or Donks (WOO) rather than the Burrow/Chase nightmare. A little worried here, in that Indy might be able to run effectively against a fairly undersized front seven.
Bills Mafia (+2.5) at Fuck LioUns (4:25, CBS)
Game of the Century (uh duh WEEK), for sure. This is quite the loaded window, truly. I get the sense that prognosticators sense a Buffalo wagon-circling here, since (i) they are the more desperate squadron; and (ii) have the best individual talent on the pitch. But Dan Campbell’s men seem to relish “prove it” moments like this. Hippo is sticking with the best position group in the NFL (ie, Fuck LioUn OL).
P*ts (+6) at Qards (4:25, CBS)
Oh, one feels bad for those stuck in this broadcast area. As small as it must be, given the complete lack of stakes and storylines. I don’t even have to stress about whether Trey McBride will bail my fantasy arse out yet again (bye week WOO).
Yinzers (+5.5) at Iggles (4:25, Fox)
Oh, how Coach Epps loves being in this spot. Almost a full-tuddy underdog? And with a defensing unit that can force Philly into reliance on the pass game? This is Yinzburgh crack, imaginary ppls. Another excellent watch. Hey, 4 outta 5 is pretty doggone good.
MRSA Men (+3) at Clippers du Merde (4:25, Fox)
It pains me to admit how good a jorb Lesser Harbs has done with his Spanoi-hexed charges. Watch him flummox Baker, Baker into being his true Turnover Maker self. But Justin Herbert has been battling various knocks all season, and I worry about his ability to navigate the Dec/Jan gauntlet in one piece. Tampa has quietly fixed its shit quite nicely, too.