Saturday Morning Footy – Open Thread

Good morning commentists wherever you are in the frozen northern hemisphere! This Premier League season has been a roller coaster of emotions for me as my beloved London Jaguras have been absolutely terrible this campaign. They've allowed 53 goals in 24 games. I am not a mathlete but that is not

Your “Superb Owl Weekend” Friday Evening Open Thread

That banner image....  That is one Superb Owl, right?  RIGHT??????? Here, have another... Hehehehe....that one always makes me laugh.  And I needed a good laugh right now. /sighs heavily I've had a disheartening and exhausting couple of days recently.  Some of you know why.  Better I don't talk about it publicly. So let's just get

Celebrity Super Bowl Picks: Tomi Lahren

Many news organizations and pop culture websites report Super Bowl picks from today's hottest celebrities. Here at DoorFliesOpen, we decided to request picks from horrible people instead. Hatemongering attention whore Timmi Latrine answered the call and submitted this poorly-worded screed for our amusement. This is entirely unedited and in her

A Mini-Roundtable Before (NFL 2018 Season) Dying (also 20 January Lesser Footy)

For your non-reading, non-pleasure - while you no doubt enjoy the Huddersfield/City and Spurs/Mighty Whitey double bill on NBCSN: Son of Spam NFC: Rams over the Saints because I'm an unabashed homer (mmmm...beer...) and the Gumbo offense has been kinda mediocre for a while. Let's say 106-20. AFC: Chiefs beat the Evil Empire by 10,

Sunday Morning Wild Card Hippo Thoughts y Roundtable

Did y'all somewhat enjoy the "action" yesterday?  Buckle up, they's MOAR comin' - like a 70s key party. We started with an imaginarium hosting yet another Saturday afternoon fixture, defying all conventional notions of physics.  Chalk this win up to an amazing game plan on both sides of the Humps'

A Round Man’s Roundtable (Saturday Fixtures) – Also FA Cup/Lesser Footy Open Thread

I am in no way, shape, or form going to try to lay out the structure or matchups involved in the English FA Cup.  I know Everton's home tie with Lincoln City is on ESPN+ at 10:00.  Surely, I will watch it and bitch heartily. No, we will collect the hivemind

NFL Playoff Preview–Chicago Bears vs Philadelphia Eagles

With the NFL Playoffs drawing nigh, I wanted to take a real quick look at the Bears-Eagles playoff matchup to see how it shapes up.   With the Bears coming off a 5-11 record the previous season, being a home favorite for this game is a great reward for a huge

JV New Year’s Eve Open Thread

So much not-that-bad-if-they-try action! Virginia Tech (+5.5) v. JV Cincinnati, Military Industrial Complex Bowl (Annapolis, MD - Noon, ESPN) I moneyline bet the Castrated Turkeys, as this is a de facto home contest, and they are fairly well-coached.  This will be at the half when this posts, so y'all may already be

Boxing Day Open Lesser Footy Thread

Rejoice, for the Merry Brits are bringing the sport lumber today! NBCSN has a quardruple-header, starting with Fulham/Wolves (NOW, nil-nil as the second half gets under way).  This is followed by a terrible Bardodes at Redshit fixture (10:00), then two pretty decent ones - Brighton/Arsenal (noon), and Chelsea/Watford (2:30). Of course 10:00