Your Very First Sunday NFL Football Open Thread

It’s been tough to make predictions in this most unlikely of football adventures this year but here’s one I feel I can safely offer. The entire NFC East will lose this week, allowing the mighty New York Football Giants to maintain their stranglehold on the division lead. Easy Peasy.

TO THE GAMES!

Saints/Falcons:

Fantasy owners looking to Kamara to win them some games down the stretch have been ambushed by The Taysom Hill Factor. Three targets in two weeks? Adding insult to injury, he’s been out-snapped by Lat Murray 34 to 25. ATL has been enjoying a prolonged ‘dead cat bounce’ after the Quinn firing-their D has gone from surrendering 32 points per game all the way down to a much more respectable 20.

Lions/Bears:

Truth Biscuit gonna have himself a game? Over his last four vs Detroit he’s had 3 TD scores each time. The secret behind his success was the Lions not disguising their coverages at all. Since-fired Patricia used little to no motion pre-snap so Mitch was able to go to get the ball to his first read. It’s hard to imagine that the Lions would be able to change things up so quickly. Your sneaky play just might be Darnell Mooney who is playing off Jeff Odukah-the latter has given up the 3rd most yards receiving despite missing 2 games.

Browns/Titans:

Since the Titans acquired Desmond King they have been PFF’s highest-graded coverage unit. Their run D remains a work in progress though. They’ve allowed the 7th most fantasy points to rb’s and struggle when opposing O’s give them a taste of their own Derrick Henry medicine. “Oh, oh. That’s Nick Chubb’s music!”

Bengals/Fins:

“Ladies and Gentlemen, if Fitz is under center, start your Devante Adams.” He gets a silly 40% target share when the bearded Harvard is in there and there are far more shots downfield. Tua is a gametimer and Flores insists if he’s ready to go he’ll be in there. At 7-4 the Fins need to take care of business here because they have K.C, N.E., L.V. and the Bills the rest of the way.

Jags/Vikes:

Minny has the 25th ranked run D and is the only team to allow 100 yards to Zeke. That bodes well for rb Robinson because The Giraffe leaned on him plenty last week to the tune of 27 touches and a ridiculous 97% snap share.

Raiders/Jets:

The Jets trajectory is such that one can get a ‘Lawrence’ jersey in green and white on eBay. They do have the league’s 4th best run D but that’s because everyone passes on them. That said, Vegas will no doubt give rb Booker (Jacobs is injured) 20 touches because Gruden will always Gruden.

Colts/Texans:

Rook Taylor was finally tearing Indy’s  RBBC asunder when he got Corona-ed. So does he immediately return as the main guy or are fantasy guys back to square one again? Many are lamenting the absence of Will Fuller but the Texans are more likely wishing that cb Bradley-Robey was on the field. Without him Houston has gifted 196/2 to Adams and 146/1 to Chark. Hear that, Michael Pittman owners?

Do you have a prediction? Let’s hear it.

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Doktor Zymm

SUDDEN CHANGE THAT NO ONE REALLY CARES ABOUT

Doktor Zymm

POV: Kirk Cousins is basically Eli Manning with fewer Transformers action figures and acrobatic receivers

Doktor Zymm

(I would say Cirque du Soleil receivers, but Eli isn’t allowed to watch such adult content)

Redshirt

Ryan Finley is openly begging his line to not get him killed.

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