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Sexy Friday: Oh Yeah

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

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Balls of Steel and Fury is off tonight, tending to the most dreaded of afflictions for web folks: Real Life-itis.

It happens. Whether it’s an issue at work, with family, or an Ay papi estoy bien bellaca text, sometimes you gotta take care of… Stuff.

Awkward See You Later GIF by Film Riot - Find & Share on GIPHY

You got to respect that, through and through. Honestly.

And yeah: I’m a card-carrying member of the Prude Squad. I’m one of those weirdos hung up on relationships and keeping horndoggery private. (Shared filth is true intimacy, you know.) But who gives a shit: Sexy Friday has been a hallowed tradition, created in the Old Country and undertaken by a lineage as fine as the Windsors and Bin Ladens: Martin, tWBS, and Steel and Furys.

So yeah, you’re gonna get The Sexay.

 

I mean, why the hell not. Exhibitionism is a web thing. For my money, this is the best looking guy ever

Honorable mention:

because, you know, nicotine + X chromosome… You can’t really pull away.

On the other hand,

/kneels down in reverence

 

Aside from  a goddess, it seems that 40+ actual women are the stuff of stock images that have to be purchased. JAJAJAJAJAJAJA (phonetic), fools

The stock photo says “Overweight yoiung woman”, which is BULLSHIT! Man, I wish Google didn’t have a “Rubens without exposed nipples” decent pics. Check every renaissance painting and pics from every damn art class you’ve taken/ Everyone has a fucking belly!

Moving on,

How about one pic with a full face

Apropos of everything, we should all live in enlightened topless Europe.

Finally,

Like whoever the hell you like. That’s the best I can say while falling down out of drunkenness. Keep it smart and sexy, mofos.

All gifs via giphy.com. Get a FOIA for the pics.

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Don T

This alkyhol headache better be gone by tomorra. Anyway, current and future mood:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=QB1zjpBSS00

1
SonOfSpam

Hey Kevin Parker, I need a groove and QUICK.

Yes, like that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN8nJFLu1Rk

1
SonOfSpam

Remember, all work and no play etc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fN-Xjpd-qE

3
Viva La Tabula Raza

I wonder if the different vaccines represent how things are going to work out over future generations. If you got the Pfizer or the Moderna, are your descendants going to be Eloi or Morlocks? Are the J&J-vaccinated going to be some kind of ruling elite?

0
ballsofsteelandfury

The ones that got Moderna will have gigantic penises.

1
SonOfSpam

Good, since I only have a daughter.

1
Horatio Cornblower

They insisted I get the Pfizer lest I terrify the natives.

2
Dunstan

Those who got Johnson & Johnson will have two penises. It’s right there in the name, sheeple!

I look forward to my new penis. I could disappoint two women at once!

6
ballsofsteelandfury

I’m now flipping between Western-Brisbane and the AFLW Semifinal between Adelaide and Melbourne.

0
SonOfSpam

Three days after the single J&J vaxx, and so far the only side effect is getting a boner when I hear a Pet Shop Boys song.

(j/k always had that happen)

Get vaccinated and get drunk and do Matt Gaetz!

0
ballsofsteelandfury

I’m using that for next week’s SF post…

1
SonOfSpam

Afraid to ask which part. ALL OF IT.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We are watching the GREAT POTTERY THROWDOWN! Every week there is a “top potter” which I assume will be Josh Gordon each time.

3
TheRevanchist

.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Dr. Mrs. bailed on it after about five minutes.

0
Gumbygirl

This has happened to me

5
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just posted 3 songs on request line; I may not be welcomed back

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We had Costco salmon burgers this evening, and every time we do they are delicious, and we wonder why we always seem to forget that we have them in the freezer.

0
litre_cola

AFL time! after Canada v Scotland in the curling of course.

2
ballsofsteelandfury

Western v Brisbane is a cracker!

0
litre_cola

Is it in a mining town????

1
ballsofsteelandfury

LIVE FROM MARS!

0
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

2
TheRevanchist

They weren’t playing the Dodgers so I don’t count it.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Whatever, the Rangers were just patriotically boycotting the act of hitting a baseball.

0
SonOfSpam

They purposely hit nothing to support Gov Abbott not throwing out the first pitch.

3
Horatio Cornblower

Could’ve honored him by just not running the bases.

/seriously, fuck that guy

2
Senor Weaselo

Well, we’re all gonna die.

0
Horatio Cornblower

To be fair, that was gonna happen anyway

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gYYZw3iYH8

1
TheRevanchist

Starting the weekend out the right way.

2
herodotus450

Newton’s Figs? Love those things.

0
litre_cola

Raspberry Newtons were the best. I would like some now.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

https://youtu.be/Hp_Ju_vbPro

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Brick Meathook

Sexy Friday?

Here’s The Apple Pan!
comment image

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Was this from tonight? Why didn’t you pick up a spare and deliver it to my apartment?

0
Brick Meathook

Nah, way old. As if I’ve been in a restaurant in over a year.

1
Dunstan

I would go to the Apple Pan more often if it wasn’t so crowded. Why do other people insist on liking things that I like?

2
Brick Meathook

When I took this photo way back when, there were people sitting right next to me.

1
Dunstan

The nerve of them.

1
Senor Weaselo

Site unfucked? Hooray for Internet Dad!

Shit, I have to start writing the two BattleBots Beats that I owe. And the hopefully fixed championship poll. And the Beaties. And a House of Pain.

3
Horatio Cornblower

Internet Dad is the unsung hero of this site.

I’d sing his praises more if he ever commented!
/that’s a hint.

6
SonOfSpam

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBfygUiS50g

1
SonOfSpam

(bah gawd, that Low Commander’s music!)

3
King Hippo

he deserves that pack of smokes, whenever he finds it

/wipes away tear

5
Mr. Ayo

This week’s bounty hunter episode was a fun one!

Last week’s, not so much.

1
litre_cola

We changed teeveee providers. All the channels are in a different order and it makes no sense to my stoner brain. This will be an issue.

1
SonOfSpam

Enjoy your 12 hours of Lifetime.

1
litre_cola

I get Temptation Island! Wife and I have to catch up. A lot of people forget the Canadian version is Temptation Cabin. A lot of pelts and pemmican.

4
Horatio Cornblower

Padres have their first no-hitter in franchise history.

2
SonOfSpam

Welcome to the club! Took you long enough.

1
Senor Weaselo

Hold your loved ones, the apocalypse is nigh.

2
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

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2
litre_cola

Guys, I may be tipsy and high, but the site hasn’t worked this well since we were in Pandemia round 1.

1
Horatio Cornblower

/monkey’s paw curls

2
litre_cola

We have had enough of the server rumble strips. We deserve better. Hail Bleergh.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Padres need to lose the pinstripes and just go with the classic brown, gold, white combo.

4
Dunstan

NO ONE DENIES THIS!

1
Mr. Ayo

In honor the post title.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENXvZ9YRjbo

1
herodotus450

Is this one of those music videos where they get completely different people to act like the band?

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Man, i forgot about Martin. Hope he’s doing well, wherever he is.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Truly a blast from the past. If I remember he frequently would make vague references to things going on in his life, then disappeared. Like you, I hope it resolved in his favor.

2
King Hippo

he so cray-zay!

0
Horatio Cornblower

Hello, friends.

I have not been watching the Masters, but I did hear that Tiger hit 84 and had trouble staying on the course. So I guess he’s out of it?

Anyway, I’m drinking this
comment image

and wondering why I don’t do it more often. Just an outstanding beer.

9
Horatio Cornblower

I swear I did not realize that picture would be life-size.

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Lagunitas is like Stone in that i almost always like what they make and too infrequently remember to pick it up.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Stone’s another one.

What I’m saying is that I need to drink more. A lot more.

2
SonOfSpam

Never disappointed with Lagunitas or Stone.

And duh, of course you should drink more. Be like Tiger.

2
Horatio Cornblower

I heard today that they found an unmarked bottle of pills near at the accident site.

But keep telling me he was straight when he went off the road at 85.
/makes dismissive wanking motion until he loses control of his car and goes off the road at 85.

Well, shit.

4
litre_cola

comment image

10
Horatio Cornblower

I’d hit it. Because I’m mostly Irish, and it’s payback time.

7
TheRevanchist

I’d hit it, but I kinda have a thing for older women.

4
SonOfSpam

I’d hit it because we have the same birthday.

And because she’s rich.

And because after the 99 year old, my penis might MIGHT look okay to her.

4
litre_cola

Everyone else gambling on SecsiMexi futbol?

Oh.

Keep drinking.

1
Horatio Cornblower

At the risk of trigerring LCSS and Boltman!, I am watching the Padres pitcher pitch a very, very good game.

3
litre_cola

I am all in for Mexcsiball. We shall not speak of the team from London for a week!

/had an unreal run in Mexico last week. Hail Gamblor.
/won Pumas game tonight. Hail Gamblor.

1
Mr. Ayo

The Jaguars? What did they do now?

1
Horatio Cornblower

Fuck yeah! Pumas.

Fuck you! Fulham.

I have to believe that Fulham’s team bus once ran over the grandchild of an old gypsy woman.

2
Gumbygirl

I’m in! Was the site down today, or was it just me? Yesterday wasn’t bad for me, and I assumed it was fixed.

1
litre_cola

Internet dad is fixing the remaining bullshit. We should be good to go and back to normal by the end of the weekend. Clear your cache and then log in again and you should be good.

In Canadian French Hide & Seek is called cache-cache. The more you know.

1
Gumbygirl

Ok, thanks. This is for you, because you are nice to the elderly

1
litre_cola

There are shit tonnes of coyotes in the foothills here. I live downtown but Oxipug would have not been safe in the burbs.

1
Horatio Cornblower

We have a bunch of coyotes around here. They make really cool noise at night, and anyone who is threatened by coyotes is a coward or a small animal.

1
Gumbygirl

We had one strolling up the street in the middle of the afternoon a few months ago. I saw it because I was doing the dishes. I’m always doing the dishes.

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Critical update: lady BFC had replenished the oranges without my knowing so i made Sharky’s cocktail from earlier today, the Rosita

1
ballsofsteelandfury

To all readers:

Apparently, clearing your cache and logging back in will work to speed things up. Please try it.

1
Horatio Cornblower

/raises hand

What’s a ‘cache’, and how do I clear it.

//Is so, so old.

3
Viva La Tabula Raza

I need to know this, too.

1
litre_cola

If using chrome, go into history. Hit clear history, you will be brought to options of clearing browsing data, clear cached images and files. Boom.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

My fave is the “puta” gif. Classic.

Thanks for filling in! I wish I’d gotten that bellaca text….

1
Don T

Mano… From what little I’ve known of singlehood, there is no Law of Booty Call Conservation: you turn X down, there will be no Y down the road.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Unless X and Y know each other.

0
Don T

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1
Horatio Cornblower

Now hang on here; how well do x and y know each other, and might they be persuaded to get to know each other…better?

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s not just a law of singlehood.

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