Sexy Friday: Oh Yeah

Balls of Steel and Fury is off tonight, tending to the most dreaded of afflictions for web folks: Real Life-itis.

It happens. Whether it’s an issue at work, with family, or an Ay papi estoy bien bellaca text, sometimes you gotta take care of… Stuff.

Awkward See You Later GIF by Film Riot - Find & Share on GIPHY

You got to respect that, through and through. Honestly.

And yeah: I’m a card-carrying member of the Prude Squad. I’m one of those weirdos hung up on relationships and keeping horndoggery private. (Shared filth is true intimacy, you know.) But who gives a shit: Sexy Friday has been a hallowed tradition, created in the Old Country and undertaken by a lineage as fine as the Windsors and Bin Ladens: Martin, tWBS, and Steel and Furys.

So yeah, you’re gonna get The Sexay.

 

I mean, why the hell not. Exhibitionism is a web thing. For my money, this is the best looking guy ever

Honorable mention:

because, you know, nicotine + X chromosome… You can’t really pull away.

On the other hand,

/kneels down in reverence

 

Aside from  a goddess, it seems that 40+ actual women are the stuff of stock images that have to be purchased. JAJAJAJAJAJAJA (phonetic), fools

The stock photo says “Overweight yoiung woman”, which is BULLSHIT! Man, I wish Google didn’t have a “Rubens without exposed nipples” decent pics. Check every renaissance painting and pics from every damn art class you’ve taken/ Everyone has a fucking belly!

Moving on,

How about one pic with a full face

Apropos of everything, we should all live in enlightened topless Europe.

Finally,

Like whoever the hell you like. That’s the best I can say while falling down out of drunkenness. Keep it smart and sexy, mofos.

All gifs via giphy.com. Get a FOIA for the pics.

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Darkest Timeline Zack Morris
DTZM escaped his dark timeline through a wormhole created by Lord Screech, after he destroyed Bayside for never allowing him to mate with Lisa Turtle. Zach now lives a quiet life in St. Louis with his wife, Darkest Timeline Kelly Kapowski. They have no children, but do have the world's cutest dogs.
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SonOfSpam

Hey Kevin Parker, I need a groove and QUICK.

Yes, like that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN8nJFLu1Rk

SonOfSpam

Remember, all work and no play etc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fN-Xjpd-qE

Viva La Tabula Raza

I wonder if the different vaccines represent how things are going to work out over future generations. If you got the Pfizer or the Moderna, are your descendants going to be Eloi or Morlocks? Are the J&J-vaccinated going to be some kind of ruling elite?

SonOfSpam

Good, since I only have a daughter.

Dunstan

Those who got Johnson & Johnson will have two penises. It’s right there in the name, sheeple!

I look forward to my new penis. I could disappoint two women at once!

SonOfSpam

Three days after the single J&J vaxx, and so far the only side effect is getting a boner when I hear a Pet Shop Boys song.

(j/k always had that happen)

Get vaccinated and get drunk and do Matt Gaetz!

SonOfSpam

Afraid to ask which part. ALL OF IT.

TheRevanchist

.

Gumbygirl

This has happened to me

litre_cola

AFL time! after Canada v Scotland in the curling of course.

litre_cola

Is it in a mining town????

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! NO HITTER! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

TheRevanchist

They weren’t playing the Dodgers so I don’t count it.

SonOfSpam

They purposely hit nothing to support Gov Abbott not throwing out the first pitch.

Senor Weaselo

Well, we’re all gonna die.

TheRevanchist

Starting the weekend out the right way.

herodotus450

Newton’s Figs? Love those things.

litre_cola

Raspberry Newtons were the best. I would like some now.

Brick Meathook

Sexy Friday?

Here’s The Apple Pan!
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Brick Meathook

Nah, way old. As if I’ve been in a restaurant in over a year.

Dunstan

I would go to the Apple Pan more often if it wasn’t so crowded. Why do other people insist on liking things that I like?

Brick Meathook

When I took this photo way back when, there were people sitting right next to me.

Dunstan

The nerve of them.

Senor Weaselo

Site unfucked? Hooray for Internet Dad!

Shit, I have to start writing the two BattleBots Beats that I owe. And the hopefully fixed championship poll. And the Beaties. And a House of Pain.

SonOfSpam
SonOfSpam

(bah gawd, that Low Commander’s music!)

litre_cola

We changed teeveee providers. All the channels are in a different order and it makes no sense to my stoner brain. This will be an issue.

SonOfSpam

Enjoy your 12 hours of Lifetime.

litre_cola

I get Temptation Island! Wife and I have to catch up. A lot of people forget the Canadian version is Temptation Cabin. A lot of pelts and pemmican.

SonOfSpam

Welcome to the club! Took you long enough.

Senor Weaselo

Hold your loved ones, the apocalypse is nigh.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

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litre_cola

Guys, I may be tipsy and high, but the site hasn’t worked this well since we were in Pandemia round 1.

litre_cola

We have had enough of the server rumble strips. We deserve better. Hail Bleergh.

Dunstan

NO ONE DENIES THIS!

herodotus450

Is this one of those music videos where they get completely different people to act like the band?

SonOfSpam

Never disappointed with Lagunitas or Stone.

And duh, of course you should drink more. Be like Tiger.

litre_cola

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TheRevanchist

I’d hit it, but I kinda have a thing for older women.

SonOfSpam

I’d hit it because we have the same birthday.

And because she’s rich.

And because after the 99 year old, my penis might MIGHT look okay to her.

litre_cola

Everyone else gambling on SecsiMexi futbol?

Oh.

Keep drinking.

litre_cola

I am all in for Mexcsiball. We shall not speak of the team from London for a week!

/had an unreal run in Mexico last week. Hail Gamblor.
/won Pumas game tonight. Hail Gamblor.

Gumbygirl

I’m in! Was the site down today, or was it just me? Yesterday wasn’t bad for me, and I assumed it was fixed.

litre_cola

Internet dad is fixing the remaining bullshit. We should be good to go and back to normal by the end of the weekend. Clear your cache and then log in again and you should be good.

In Canadian French Hide & Seek is called cache-cache. The more you know.

Gumbygirl

Ok, thanks. This is for you, because you are nice to the elderly

litre_cola

There are shit tonnes of coyotes in the foothills here. I live downtown but Oxipug would have not been safe in the burbs.

Gumbygirl

We had one strolling up the street in the middle of the afternoon a few months ago. I saw it because I was doing the dishes. I’m always doing the dishes.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I need to know this, too.

litre_cola

If using chrome, go into history. Hit clear history, you will be brought to options of clearing browsing data, clear cached images and files. Boom.