Hey.

Oh, you’re going to come at me with “I thought we changed the locks.” and “Can’t you take a hint?”

Hurtful.

It’s time for the (now) weekly DFO Fantasy Football Leagues recap. Week 8 is in the books.

What do the standings look like now?

First up, Freezer Vodka League:

There’s a four-way tie atop the standings: Lowratio’s Couch Fetish, Musical War Propheteers, JD’s Chesterfield Dreams and Stoma Fuckers Utd all with 6-2 records.  It’s anyone’s championship and that’s why they play the games!  Hot on the their heels we have We Are Spamily, Sofa Loren, Original Recipe White Claws and AJ Hawk Tuah Tagovailoa at 5-3.  In sole possesion of the Jeff Fisher Zone is Heinous Fuckery at 4-4, followed by Big Bag of Suck at 3-5.  These last teams are all on the Struggle Bus and in real danger of relegation: Dead Hobos and Free Thursday Night Points sit at 2-6, The Schlitzstains at 1-7 and poor Unnatural Gas, like the last debutante at the cotillion, is sitting all alone at 0-8.

Remember, True Believer, that the bottom four (4) teams in Freezer Vodka League will be relegated to Lowratio League for next season.

Now for the aforementioned Lowratio League:

Duke’s Chicago Waffles maintains it’s iron grip on the top spot and it’s perfect season with another victory this week, taking them to 8-0. Rod Rust never sleeps, War and Peace and Gumbygirl’s Felonious Monks round out the denizens of the Promotion Zone with identical 6-2 tallies.  Sitting in the Jeff Fisher Zone we have Shiba is for the People! Dick’s Sweet Candy Asses, Casa do vinho FC and the Bearsenschiesse Barons, all at 4-4. Another cluster just short of that .500 record at 3-5 contains Ambiguous Aaron Rodgers, Sebastian’s Swag Team and Gimli’s Groin Grabbers. Heather’s Horrible Hikes and The Brick Experience share a 2-6 record, leaving A&H’s Used Vape Cartridge in last, but no longer sans victory, at 1-7.

Top four (4) from Lowratio League get that coveted promotion to Freezer Vodka League for next season.

Until Next Time!