Darkest Timeline Zack Morris
DTZM escaped his dark timeline through a wormhole created by Lord Screech, after he destroyed Bayside for never allowing him to mate with Lisa Turtle. Zach now lives a quiet life in St. Louis with his wife, Darkest Timeline Kelly Kapowski. They have no children, but do have the world's cutest dogs.
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VonTazeMeBro

Seriously? No “she can handle my sword” quips? Damn I’m disappointed in yall.

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ballsofsteelandfury

I think he’s used to the models that have balls on the end:

http://rawdrip.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/balloon.jpg

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Old School Zero

This is appropriate because the video also shows him practicing blowing.

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Old School Zero

It’s still a big improvement over his earlier form.

http://i.imgur.com/LYSVyr8.gif

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WhyEaglesWhy

You beat me to it!

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makeitsnowondem

Well, it’s a pretty advanced technique. At the beginning he’s holding two swords.

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Old School Zero

He’s at his best with a couple of big dirks.

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