Government. Am I right?
I recently attempted to mail a standard, domestic mail package to a common acquaintance. The result was a two week wait to find out that the parcel was not able to be delivered and was therefore returned to me through a small metal flap next to my front door. A failure on all fronts but one on which I believe I stand exonerated of responsibility or guilt of any kind.
You cannot tell me that the 1.5 billion dollars (or more, surely) per year the Canadian people – not the government, it is not their money – bestows upon the CBC (which they use to undercut private news organizations in the advertising market) would not be better served on getting my goddamn packages where they goddamn need to be without all this goddamned rigmarole about weights and measures and stamping of bird pictures with piddling values in turn stamped upon them.
Granted, I did leave out the building number but the scribblings applied to the package in question at least hint at an attempt to determine said number. Are these blue khaki-shorted waterheads not aware of internet search engines? Through which they could determine where my brother in “law” could be easily located by his prolific postings of greasy coitus parties listing his full name and address? Is this beyond the “scope” of their duties? Hogwash.
Regardless of institutional ineptitude I have sent the unit again. Utilizing the oh-so-convenient flat rate bubble mailer those drooling pocket-riflers have provided to fleece me yet again. Or at least I was going to, if that pink-bellied crowd in Ottawa deigned to consider that an important thing to ensure all Canadians may access. No, they would prefer we spend 90 minutes a day watching the same two commercials from the same two stores about the same bleeding coffee and lawn rakes over and over again until our eyes bleed.
What a lark to be able to abuse my original postage thus rendering it unusable and then have the good fortune of selling me yet more to complete the process a second time. No one ever said the government was a laggard when it comes to drawing cash from the common man.
To summarize: governments are ruthless back alley thieves with the conscience of a syphilitic badger but if I must have my pockets turned out and shaken in the gutter I should at least be able to send sacks of poorly labelled commodities through the mail.
And if said mailed article fails to reach its destination yet again, through no fault of my own and instead totally and utterly through the now-commonplace ineptitude of a government-run institution, I will have but one option remaining to right this wrong:
I’d take a swing at one of those rampage deals but do you know how hard it is to get UPS to send restricted weapons across the border?
Episode 4 of Westworld may be the best spoof of contemporary action movies ever
Or 5. I’ve lost track.
Nice short-arm fastball. There was recently a bad tv show with a hot lady who pitched the baseball.
Tonight on OW! MY BALLS!
It’s important to teach the kids a trade…… like cooking meth.
I hope Jonny Q and company are actually working on a COVID vaccine!
But that would ruin the “joke.”
The adult version of Johnny Quest in Venture Bros. was magnificent.
Yes. The Brock Samson avatar disappeared somewhere.
The Elway NFL draft press conference was interesting.
So much like my fantasies it’s scary.
Home decorating in Canada….. from what I hear.
You don’t like my tablecloth?
At least you could eat like a regular human being laying down on the couch!!
Very true. That’s the only patch of my table with enough room to take that picture. Everything happens on the couch.
I just agreed to let this website use cookies . . . for the ten thousandth time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ye8mB6VsUHw
Consent is important.
Just so you know; somebody waffled a pot brownie.
Was that someone Moose?
No, I’m more of a smoker; I don’t like being too high for 48 hours.
*May need to adjust dosage.
Not the heroes we want, the heroes we need:
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/abcs-will-reeve-explains-after-being-caught-without-pants-live-on-gma/
What’s to “explain”?
Well, we know the majority of the population is ignorant to the proper use of pants. I blame Big Textiles for the pants wearing propaganda push. The Plantagenets started this.
MEAT ALERT! MEAT ALERT! I just checked the Vons upcoming flyer and they will have bone-in NY strip steaks, chicken legs/thighs/leg quarters, AND ground turkey on sale starting tomorrow. PLUS a fifteen pack of Golden Road fruit beers (perfectly adequate and pretty nice when it’s hot) for like $11. And if you wait until Friday to go you can get $5 back.
I am more excited about this than I have been about anything in a long time.
I built this when I was kid back when the movie came out.
Pretzels!?!?
Someone got upgraded to Economy Plus
Also ice cream is on sale.
Ummm, YOU DIDNT HAVE MY ADDRESS RIGHT!!! Do you know how long the avenue I live on is? It spans over 100 blocks!?!?! I am now out of weed and one cannot subsist on wine and edibles alone especially with your nephew who is a toddler lunatic.
There were plenty of numbers available to them. And like I mentioned, the coitus parties would lead them right to you.
Hopefully the next one gets there. I think I double checked that it was all there. Though, I was sure on the first one, too.
Plenty of numbers available to them. I just snort-laughed and scared my cat! Of all the Dicks in BC, you sir, are the Dickiest!
CANADIAN GO TIME NOW!!
In the US we just mail important stuff.
This is wonderful. Canadian rage knows no bounds…
Sourry.
Heh heh heh. That was “show the Dr. Mrs.” worthy.