Request Line: Nationalities

INT. STADIUM - DAY Wait, it's an open roof stadium, wouldn't that be EXT.?  Yeah, but they're in a luxury box, so technically it's an interior shot where lighting design will be required. Oh, okay.  Ahem. As I was saying... INT. STADIUM - DAY A pair of sleazy Hollywood producers are sitting in comfortable chairs in

Request Line: Holier Than Thou

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY The PRODUCER sits at the sound board, finishing up the setup for the upcoming show.  DJ 3000 is alert, sitting in his regular position in the studio.  PRODUCER: Hey man, thanks so much for saving me from Derek Carr last week. DJ 3000: YOU MEAN DAVID CARR, AND

Request Line: Blood

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – NIGHT Wait, doesn't the show usually take place during the day? I'M SORRY DID I FUCKING STUTTER? INT. RECORDING STUDIO - THE MIDDLE OF THE GODDAMNED NIGHT The PRODUCER sits at the sound board, setting things up for the upcoming show.  The recording booth is dark, and the PRODUCER

Request Line: Hair Care

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY The PRODUCER sits comfortably at the sound board, setting things up for the upcoming show.  DJ 3000 remains up against the wall, performing a deep memory scan.  The PRODUCER finishes making some adjustments to the sliders, then taps on the glass of the recording booth to

Request Line: Wishful Thinking

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY The PRODUCER sits comfortably at the sound board, setting things up for the upcoming show.  He's been reunited with DJ 3000, who has successfully returned after being trapped for months in a time loop.  Only...something feels a little bit different.  PRODUCER: Man, does it feel good to

The Carol of the Bowls

Dry January has come to an end, and with it, the sobriety of many.  I always thought that Dry January was silly; this year I came up with what I thought would be a more productive alternative: try to stay sober for at least one seven-day stretch per month.  But

The Rules of Play Action

Set in the shadow of the decaying buildings and streets of Baltimore, The Rules of Play Action is a startlingly funny, kaleidoscopic novel about three kharacters with no plans for the future - or even the present - who become entangled in a curious romantic triangle. Rikki-Tikki-Deadly trains his incisive

Your “Gravity Always Wins” Jets-Browns Open Thread

It is hard to fathom The Narrator's cruelty, sometimes.  Most fans of moribund franchises approach the season with glum resignation, knowing that draft picks and free agent acquisitions will have little effect on the team's fortunes, and by mid-November they can comfortably relax and enjoy the feats of more competitive