BattleBots Beat: Double-Double

Senor Weaselo - January 20, 2022January 19, 2022

Welcome back to the Beat! Last week, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRpA9hDjK6w Minotaur had a fire. Tombstone had a fire. And Pain Train's batteries had a fire. Well, I can pretty much guarantee there will be fewer fires. If there were more fires I'd be pretty damn impressed because that would essentially be every fight. Onto the

BattleBots Beat: “Well, I Woke Up to Get Me a Cold Pop…”

Senor Weaselo - January 13, 2022January 13, 2022

Yup, we're starting out with a Sweet Brown reference. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iWtD7x0J8xg And yet you still read this dreck! Welcome back to the BattleBots Beat! As far as BattleBots review columns go. I remain your friendly neighborhood Senor Weaselo, apparently chief correspondent on all non-human competitions—this, the Marble League Rolldown, McNally McMonster hunting seasons, and

Return of the BattleBots Beat: Your 2021* Preview!

Senor Weaselo - January 6, 2022January 5, 2022

*Sees it's Wednesday the 5th* Shit, I should probably write this. Greetings lizard people one and all, it's time for another season of everyone's favorite inhuman and therefore wholesome violence! Yes, it's the 2021 season and they're starting it on *checks calendar* dammit, Light Treason Day. Well, at least there'll be something

BattleBots Beat: Presenting Your 2020* Beaties!

Senor Weaselo - April 22, 2021April 22, 2021

The site's working again, so let's do this! Welcome one and all to the BattleBots Beaties! It's a bit late, considering the season's been over for how long, but I'm making the executive decision that next week I'll just write up a briefer recap of the remaining bounties, because I'm currently

BattleBots Beat: The Sausalito Stallion

Senor Weaselo - March 25, 2021March 24, 2021

Well, the Beat returns! The Beaties'll come eventually (can I finish Banner Madness first, we're almost done after all), but as an added bonus comes the Bounty Hunters vehicle. It's a new format for this year, but one that according to the BattleBots execs they had been kicking about for a

BattleBots Beat: Your New Champion Is…

Senor Weaselo - March 18, 2021March 18, 2021

Welcome back to the Beat! The recap this morning is a pretty simple premise: Eight robots, seven fights, one champion. So with that, let's get started. 5. Black Dragon vs. 20. RibbotRecords don't matter now anyway, it's the final 8 bots. And one of these bots you could totally have expected to

BattleBots Beat: The Final Octet

Senor Weaselo - March 11, 2021March 10, 2021

Welcome back to the Beat! I open up with a lightbulb moment that we'll get back to later as we break down the fights. So, we haven't been covering the Bounty Hunters side episodes on Discovery+ for a variety of reasons, one of which is "if I'm getting a free trial

BattleBots Beat: Burn it All Down

Senor Weaselo - March 4, 2021March 4, 2021

Welcome back to the Beat! Last time out I did a dumb and thought HiJinx would upset Uppercut, and was rewarded with about a ten-second fight. How about the bracket this week? Well, the title might give things away. So, onto the fights! 14. Lock-Jaw vs. 19. Shatter!Lock-Jaw: 2-1 (W, KO

BattleBots Beat: You Too Can Become an Octofinalist!

Senor Weaselo - February 25, 2021February 24, 2021

A blurb in one year of my high school's yearbook had the note about the debate team "You too can become a triple-octofinalist." Which I guess would be a round of 64 of whatever big debate tournament there is. I don't know, I wasn't on the debate team. But anyway, welcome

BattleBots Beat: Start Your Arguments!

Senor Weaselo - February 18, 2021February 18, 2021

Welcome back to the Beat! It's the last midnight Fight Night of the (technically) 2020 season, and with it the 32-bot bracket will be revealed following the conclusion. Will there be seeding complaints? Undoubtedly! Who's in and out complaints? Probably! Will we know? Not until the end, so onto the