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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 21, 2024May 21, 2024

66

"Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall." Proverbs 16:18 (KJV) For someone with such deep-seated self-loathing, I can be surprisingly arrogant. It's a puzzle. In my brash youth of, uh, a month ago, I made a sincere but reckless pronouncement regarding the sixth pick of the NFL Draft: "I will

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 14, 2024May 14, 2024

105

We're going camping this weekend. I hate camping. My ancestors camped for 40 fucking years in the desert because they were complaining dickholes who reverted to idolotry at the drop of a hat. Camping was punishment, and the intervening 3000 years of Jewish history have been a relatively steady march away from

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - May 7, 2024May 7, 2024

55

Whelp, it finally happened. This ragtag website, "run" by a bunch of idiots, shitheads, ne'erdowells, reprobates and overall dumbasses,  has  reached 10,000 posts. And I just want to say, on behalf of those behind the scenes, who put their heart, soul, time and money into this crazy little online clubhouse: What an

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 30, 2024April 30, 2024

67

So that was something, huh? To get 27 picks into the NFL Draft and then have the entire city of Detroit fall into a gaping chasm in the Earth's crust, a la the very fine text game Fallen London? I feel for all those trapped in their new underground catacomb,

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 25, 2024April 25, 2024

454

So here we are. Clock is ticking. Mistakes will be made, both happy accidents and career-ending missteps. Christmas Morning for our deviant kind. Ho ho ho, bitches. As predicted, whole lotta bullshit spewing from all quarters. Also as predicted, I am not immune to the Draft Brain Slugs that infect the media

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 23, 2024April 23, 2024

100

Ah Spring. When the grass begins growing, the basketball and hockey playoffs still feel fresh, and the pollen counts are so high that even Josh Gordon thinks maybe them plants should take it down a notch. It's also the time for my annual Book Binge. Being an antisocial nerdlinger, I read

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 16, 2024April 16, 2024

63

Anything that gets the adrenaline moving like a 440 volt blast in a copper bathtub is good for the reflexes and keeps the veins free of cholesterol... -Hunter S. Thompson I miss poker. Haven't played since DFOCon 23, through lack of time and spare energy. Everyone has their own grand philosophical take on

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 9, 2024April 9, 2024

44

So that was a week, huh? We laughed, we cried, we pondered what we had done wrong in life to merit the mental picture of Mark Davis shitting in a pot of soup. This part of the draft is even harder to predict, because: 1. Each guess is based on the guesses

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - April 2, 2024April 2, 2024

72

HOLLA AT YA BITCHES, IT'S REVEREND MAYHEM ON THE MIC! E'ERYBODY SAY "HOOOOOOOO!" Tough crowd. Moving on. Horatio Cornblower, our resident Mock Draft Maestro, has kindly allowed me to take first swing at this year's NFL Guess Fest. We're still more than three weeks out, but trust me- it's not going to

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - March 26, 2024March 26, 2024

86

Sorry kids. Shitty weeks plus misbehaving neurochemistry means you get Grouchy Rev tonight. First, we have another stuck boat. But this time instead of boat constipating world commerce, boat destroyed a major bridge and killed some folks. It also blocked one of America's largest ports. I told you the boats would

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - March 19, 2024March 19, 2024

60

Well that was quite a week, wasn't it? Two teams formally gave up on their young franchise centerpieces. First, the Steelers sent Kenny Pickett and a fourth round pick to the Iggles for essentially a third. Not great return, but there is something to be said for cutting your loses. Realizing that

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem - March 12, 2024March 12, 2024

76

Hello, friends. Welcome to the NFL Legal Tampering Period! Back in the Old Days (2011), agents and teams were prohibited from negotiating free agent contracts at all prior the official opening of free agency- it was considered tampering with a player who was still under contract. People were understandably suspicious, therefore,