Tag: Reverend Mayhem

The (W)Omen (and Halloween Open Thread)

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INTERIOR, REPUBLIC RECORDS LOBBY. A DESPONDENT RECORD EXECUTIVE SITS ON A BENCH, WITH A CATHOLIC PRIEST STANDING PRIEST: The relationship...is dead. RECORD EXECUTIVE: No. No, not again. Taylor's fans are rabid, but our research indicates another album of thinly-veiled spite songs will crash her brand. Swifties today want love. They want hope...not

Paradise By The Dashboard Light: 2023 Carolina Panthers at the Bye (and Open Thread)

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MAYHEM'S 2023 PREDICTION: "6-11. It’s not going to be a pretty 6-11 either, and without a first rounder next year, I wouldn’t hold out much hope there either." HOW'S THAT LOOKING?: Even Worse! The Panthers are 0-6, showing almost no signs of life on either side of the ball. So: meatloaf. Or

“So Far, So Good” Said The Skydiver With No Parachute: 2023 Tampa Bay Buccaneers at the Bye (and Open Thread)

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MAYHEM'S 2023 PREDICTION: "4-13. Look for Ryan Tannehill or Kirk Cousins to sign here next year if they don't have the draft position for a top-tier QB." HOW'S THAT LOOKING?: Not great, Bob! The Bucs are currently 3-1, and that is their best-likely-case scenario. Sure, a radioactive cheese steak could have

URSA MAXIMA!…Tuesday Open Thread

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So as usual, political news is a mixed bag. For example, the extremely-short-term Spending Bill that passed Saturday night to keep parts of the government open for another 45 days has some pros and cons Pro: essential social services continue! Con: no new Ukraine aid Pro: exposed the "Freedom Caucus" for not holding

TayTay Tuesday…Tuesday Open Thread

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Can't stop. Won't stop. Taylor Swift Fever has swept the NFL, as Pennsylvania's Sweetheart gave creedence to rumors that she and Master of the Masturbatory Mime Travis Kelce are An Item. Swift and potential-future-ex-potential-future-mother-in-law Donna Kelce looked on from a suite at Arrowhead as the Chefs demolished the Bears, and then she

Burdened with Glorious Purpose: 2023 Buffalo Bills Preview and Tuesday Open Thread

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2022 PREDICTION: 9-8 2022 REALITY: 13-3! (No record for Cincy game, on account of Damar Hamlin temporarily dying) From last year's Preview:   There is nothing more depressing to a Bills fan than an expectation of success. We can't cope with it, because of our near-religious faith in The Narrative. The Narrative has taught us

Can’t We Just Hit “Simulate Season”?: 2023 Carolina Panthers Season Preview

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2022 PREDICTION: Bad 2022 REALITY: Worse (but not bad enough) The Carolina Panthers. They have been in the league for nearly 30 years, and yet they have never shaken that Expansion Franchise stink despite playing in two Super Bowls- which I attribute to their insistence on teal-adjacent colors. They exist solely to

THUD…Tuesday Open Thread

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REMINDER: This year, we've chosen to open up Team Previews for audience participation. We've had several brave volunteers, but the following are still available: C-Hox Giants Tampa Bay Panthers Falcons So if you'd like to try your hand, reach out to me at [email protected] and we'll get you set up. NFL NEWS -COMMANDERS CHAOS: Whelp, just in case