Every September, there is a weekly slate of games that is just refried ass. Welcome to said Saturday.
Georgia at Missouri (Noon, ESPN)
Both of these teams are undefeated, but only one is any good, and maybe not even one (thus the slight opportunity for a trap game).
Notre Dame at Wake Forest
Ehh, I've talked about him enough. Besides, there are other things to vibrate the vocal cords about. Like, why the heckfire are you gonna watch this oh-so-entertaining shit show? Let's talk about your childhood-did you fall out of a tree as a youngster? Did you hear your parents make grunting
It's 17 September, 2018. Have you seen your placekicker's psyche lately?
/also HAIL SHANK'LOR!!, Goddess Bless
Two weeks in, two Draws on the board, as we got a 29-29 scorigami in fat-ass cheese land. Mason Crosby missed once (nice icing timeout, Mister Winkles!!), and rookie Daniel Carlson missed a few hundred times (including dead
He looked quite unimposing as he stepped off the bus. I was sitting on a bench nearby and he asked me, "where am I?" I said, "somewhere you probably don't want to be'. "Story of my life. You got a smoke for an old man?" I gave him the last
And we're not tilting at windmills, friends-this be the real thing and all. I trust you have a very many intoxicants and mood-enhancers at arm's length, that you've finished tying the children up in the basement, (or crawlspace, either one is fine) handed the wife a few 20's and said,
Sadly, our first shite International Break is upon us, so one can sleep in until noon (unless one has work to catch up on all weekend like I do, over footy but fucking still, UGH). A full Saturday before NFL Week 1 would have been superb, but alas. To the
So, your friendly neighborhood Balls was enjoying his Labour Day weekend of not doing jack shit when he decided to not only start talking in the third person, but he also discovered some horrifying news.
Sit yourselves down for this one:
Apparently, the Miss Bumbum pageant in Brazil will end after this
Of course, as a player you might be just fine talent-wise but your contract might not be to management's liking. Or perhaps you've got the requisite amount of experience but there's a rookie that the coaching staff is curious about. Maybe you were favoured by a previous regime and the
Actually, I'm not much of a fighter. I'm more of a lover... hmm that's not really correct either. I've always found that to be a strange dichotomy, myself. When it comes down to it I guess I'm more of an appreciator-of good scotch, good books, good profit margins, good games,
Thursday. Friday. Saturday. Sunday. Spread your wings, preseason football, show 'em what you got. This is the best quality you'll get as most starters will play into the third quarter like the heroes that they are. What did we do to deserve such a blessing? I think it's because we
That's right, baby. Ain't nobody more popular than the backup QB, especially when he's the redneck nephew of Jim Kelly, who somehow managed to get kicked out of fucking Clemson yet be 10 times smarter than functional illiterate Paxton Lynch. Anyway, here's the delightful Brandon Perna to take you through Swag
[kid's entertainer walks onto stage to rabid applause]
Entertainer: "HELLO OUT THERE, ALL MY LITTLE POOPSTERS!"
Audience: "HELLO CAPTAIN SHITSTAIN!"
C-Stain: "Oh! It's so lovely to see all my friends. There's Dookie in the front row."
[camera pans to excited child wearing a "Don't Shit Where You Eat" t-shirt]
C-Stain: "Boy, have I got a