A Tradition Like Any Other: Augusta National Can F*** Right Off

Here's a secret: I despise the dipshits who run Augusta National Golf Club. Glad-handing, misogynist dickheads who use the ideas of "tradition" and "the old ways" to actively make their golf tournament as white as possible. IT'S A GOLF TOURNAMENT YOU FUCKING FUCKS. Fuck these people with Satan's chainsaw wang. Yeah,

Your “There’s No Crying In Baseball” Thursday Evening Open Thread

....Unless you're a Baltimore fan. Hello sportsfans!!!!!!  This is, temporarily at least.... tWBS  coming to you live...well sort of live. Live-ish....? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWKA9Zi5-_Y   That banner image up there was taken by none other than yours truly at Camden Yards two seasons ago, btw.  Not bad, eh? Anywhoooo.... CervezaNiñoRoberto  decided to go watch baseball today, so I'm filling

Your “Why Don’t Stupid People Know They’re Stupid?” Thursday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: It sounds like the Raiders are pushing hard for Antonio Brown. Lord knows they've got spare first-round picks. John Gruden got off his knees long enough to say, "He’s the hardest working man, I think, in football," Gruden said. "Hardest working player I’ve ever seen practice, and I’ve

Orchids of Asia Day Spa Report Context

  Good Morning and thank you all for being our here today on such a chilly Boston morning. I am speaking before you this morning to share valuable insight regarding last week's allegations that my boyfriend of seven years but not father of my 10 month old child, Mr Robert Kraft, will

Your “It’s Not Free Money” Saturday Evening Open Thread

I moved my music & comedy ramblings to Sunday night, so I could bring this up. Before it becomes old news, rumours are Kaep settled for between $60-80 million, ostensibly for restraint or loss of trade. https://twitter.com/businessinsider/status/1096504331938000897 On the direct "insider" front from Friday night, there was nothing but company line from corporate

Your “What’s Worse – A Pattern or a Trend?” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: Following up on a balls comment from last night's Open Thread, the Super Bowl viewership rating was a 41.1, or an average of 98.2 million viewers. The lowest viewership rating since 2003, Super Bowl XXXVII - Raiders vs. Bucs. Market share varied across the country: Boston had a

Your Saturday Evening “Why Do I Do This Every Year?” [DFO] Hate Week Open Thread

Site news: Please consider this a friendly reminder to any lurkers or casual observers of the site - if you want to participate in our largest live-blog of the year tomorrow, just click on the register link at the top of the page. I will try to drunkenly approve folks in

[DFO] Hate Week Presents: Owners Who Suck – Stan Kroenke & Dean Spanos

Today's final installment of [DFO] Hate Week is brought to you by marrying rich, prenuptial agreements, and the Mayflower Moving Company. Now, normally the fourth day & final day of [DFO] Hate Week is set aside for attacking pet peeves I've had with the league over the year: GOODELL, Roger DISGRACE,

Celebrity Super Bowl Picks: Tomi Lahren

Many news organizations and pop culture websites report Super Bowl picks from today's hottest celebrities. Here at DoorFliesOpen, we decided to request picks from horrible people instead. Hatemongering attention whore Timmi Latrine answered the call and submitted this poorly-worded screed for our amusement. This is entirely unedited and in her

Gazing Into Balls’ Crystal Balls – Superb Owl Prédiction

This is my last prediction post for the season discussing who will make the playoffs,  who won’t,  who will win,  and who won’t. As promised,  I’ve been keeping track of what I say week to week so you can call me out on any bullshit you may see. TODAY,  I’ll recap and