Gazing Into Balls’ Crystal Balls – Week 14

This is my weekly outlook as to who will make the playoffs,  who won’t,  who will win,  and who won’t. As promised,  I’m keeping track of what I say week to week so you can call me out on any bullshit you may see. At the end of the season,  I’ll recap

Your “Oh God, That’s Hilarious” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: The headline really buries the lede: Jay Gruden: We didn't have many plays for Mark Sanchez Nowhere in the story does it point out that it was Jay Gruden who chose to have Mark Sanchez on his active roster. As noted by the master himself:  "Well, we had

Gazing Into Balls’ Crystal Balls – Week 13

This is my weekly outlook as to who will make the playoffs,  who won’t,  who will win,  and who won’t. Essentially,  it will be an exercise in pissing Hippo and Moose off. Also,  as promised,  I’m keeping track of what I say week to week so you can call me out on any

Instant Hippo Thoughts

"OW MY HEAD!" "UGH, MY STOMACH!" "YIKES,  MY BALLS!" These may be some of the thoughts going through Hippo's head today as he is under the weather and has requested assistance in fulfilling his weekly report to you fine folks. Now,  granted,  I do not speak hillbilly although I can understand it. Thus,  you

Bob McNair goes to the Good Place

/Inside an empty waiting room with an instrumental version of Creed’s My Sacrifice being played in the background /Suddenly, a Door Flies Open. A younger looking Bob McNair enters the room Bob McNair: What in the hell? Where am I? /A Confused McNair notices another door to his left and decides to walk

Your “Why Can’t It Be Like That Every Night?” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Notes: The Chiefs-Rams game was ESPN's highest-rated game in four years.  Last night's game could singlehandedly turn around the NFL's Nielsen numbers...until the next arcane roughing the QB flag, or Jets game. Of all the ridiculous stats to come out of the game, Kareem Hunt became the first player

Your “Que Desafortunado Para Ti” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: For those of you who live in the region: Chiefs-Rams tickets went on sale Wednesday. They are setting aside seats for the first responders fighting the fires and police who answered the Thousand Oaks shooting call. It'll be the first Monday Night game at the Coliseum since 1985.

Your “Let’s Turn Everyone Into RG III” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: There is was talk about maybe having to either delay or move the Mexico City game, because the field is apparently complete ass. Estadio Azteca switched to a hybrid turf of both synthetic and natural grass this year, and it has been unable to hold up for the

Caleb Sturgis Takes a Ride

EXTERIOR – CHARGERS PRACTICE FACILITY, COSTA MESA, CA – MIDDAY [CALEB STURGIS walks alone to his car following Monday's walk-through. He seems a bit forlorn, yet still has the semblance of an optimistic smile on face. As he is a few feet from his car, another vehicle rolls up] [CAR DOOR FLIES

Nobody’s Chargers 2018 (Late) Bye Week Update – The End of an Era

INTERIOR – ST. CATHEDRAL, LOS ANGELES – MIDDAY [A massive group of formal, yet lavishly dressed people fill the pews of the church. The room is so packed with bodies that there is a constant murmur that drowns out the few notes of the organ just audible above the buzz. DEAN

The 500s past the 500 mark. That means at least 3 things.

The 500s, officially known as the Houston Texans,  are winning at an over .500 pace.  Their record past the halfway (.500!) mark is either 5-4 or 6-3 depending on what happened when Demaryius Thomas met his ex-girlfriend. (Update: he didn't quite do as too many NFL players do in an elevator

BOLTMAN GROUP Presents – The Sound of the Beast

♫ Set to the music of “The Number of the Beast” from Iron Maiden ♫ GHOST OF JUNIOR SEAU: Woe to you, oh Span-oiiii, for the deal you made sends the beast with wrath, Because he knows the time is nigh... Let him who hath electric dance moves reckon the sound of the beast For it