NIGHT – SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA – NONDESCRIPT OFFICE BUILDING INTERIOR [The camera pans across an empty and dimly lit office brimming with cubicals as free-use holiday music plays softly in the background. The camera stops on the only illuminated desk, where an extremely pale but handsome young man in a Santa hat
5th year Pro Bowl cornerback for That Team That Moved, Jason Verrett, suffered a torn ACL on the very first day of training camp which will cause him to miss the entire 2018 season. Some are suggesting that the team may be cursed, given their year over year injury history,
Third year tight end Hunter Henry was struck down with an ACL injury on Tuesday, likely sidelining him for the entire 2018 season. BOLTMAN referred any questions about his involvement to his spokesman Peter Carr, who declined to comment.
WHAT MADNESS IS THIS?! FERMENTEDBEVERAGEHUMANMALEROBERT HAS AWAKENED BOLTMAN FROM HIS DEEP, DARK SLUMBER WITHIN THE BOWELS OF SAN DIEGO COUNTY CREDIT UNION QUALCOMM JACK MURPHY STADIUM, DEMANDING HIS DECREE ON THE DAILY HAPPENINGS OF THE MORTAL WORLD OF THE ACCURSED NFL! BOLTMAN WILL ASSURE YOU ALL THAT FERMENTEDBEVERAGEHUMANMALEROBERT'S MESSENGER MET A SLOW AND
FEBRUARY 2017 - MIDDAY - INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA - CHARGERS/RAMS JOINT STADIUM SITE [Three well-dressed men exit a limo and approach a chain-link fence, bordering a sprawling quagmire of mud] STAN KROENKE: The foreman is telling me that this rain may cause a serious delay. DEAN SPANOS: How serious? DALE KOGER: With the high rainfall so far this
♫ Set to the music of “Bohemian Rhapsody” from Queen ♫ FANS: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a cash grab, One escape from re-al-ity. Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see… DEAN SPANOS: I'm such a rich boy, I want your sympathy, Because Dad-dy came, I will go, Pretty high; lots of