Love me them uprights. Eagles Preview

I have gathered the DFO luminaries Gratliff and WhyEaglesWhy to assist me in breaking down the coming season. Q - How was your summer? Gratliff: I have not seen a sporting event I care about since the Flyers were eliminated in mid-March. I want to die.  WhyEaglesWhy: WELL ACTUALLY, it’s winter here in the Land

Your 2019 Seattle Seahawks Preview

Rainy City Football Chums Walkthrough Here we are at the beginning of another new season and lo, what promise it holds. More replays! Endless delays! And despite all this, many missed calls. Makes you wonder why you sat and watched three idiots blathering in a booth about a microscopic difference in

Your Kill! Kill! Kill! How Lesser Footy caused World War III open thread

As much as we like to pretend sports is pure and innocent, we all know she has taken a few pokes from the tips of wealthy businessmen over the years and has definitely done anal (it's the sex  God can't see if you're hetero-- sorry LGBTQ). It's why in every Lesser

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Advice Mailbag #14

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over until THE SHIELD cranks up the bullshit

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Advice Mailbag Lucky #13

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over and THE SHIELD has just barely started

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Mailbag Número Doce

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over until THE SHIELD cranks up the bullshit

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Advice Mailbag #11

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over until THE SHIELD cranks up the bullshit

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Advice Mailbag Number 10

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over until THE SHIELD cranks up the

Mouth Flies Open: DFO Advice Mailbag Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine…

The team at DFO is committed to brightening the world with insights, observations, and dick jokes. This mailbag feature is just one more way in which we extend our mission beyond football to the rest of life’s broad and multi-chromatic palette. While the NFL season is over until THE SHIELD cranks up the

Better Know a Banner Bracket: BOLTMAN Regional

And here we are, the fourth and final of our regional previews. This is the BOLTMAN Regional. OHHHHH YEEEEEEAAHHHHHHHHH! Erhem. Sorry. We all have our femurs intact? Good. Let's go. 1. "[Is] there also a Cripso's on another corner in Compton?" 16. "THESE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS I CALL THEM ROBERT MULDOON, BECAUSE THEY GOT EATEN

Better Know a Banner Bracket: SHAN’KHOR Regional

Welcome to the third day of bracket previews for the first annual [DFO] Banner Tournament, pitting past banners against each other for the glory of the wrath of the Lord. That's a church sign I saw in New Jersey the other day. I don't know if we should be praising

Better Know a Banner Bracket: GAMBLOR Regional

Greetings again, and welcome back to the first annual [DFO] Banner Tournament Preview. And may I confirm, this is just the PREVIEW. The tournament proper doesn't start until Friday, as that is March 1st. These four days (yesterday, today, tomorrow, and Thursday) are just the unveiling of the regions—take that