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Category: So Long Assholes

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  • Labor Day Open Thread – JV MNF Golddigger edition

    Labor Day Open Thread – JV MNF Golddigger edition

    September 1, 2025

      Today was Labor Day in the US.  Which we celebrate by making the lowest paid work while those who can afford to take…

  • Nobody’s Chargers 2024 Season Preview: Payin’ for it

    Nobody’s Chargers 2024 Season Preview: Payin’ for it

    September 4, 2024

    INTERIOR – CHARGERS PRACTICE FACILITY BOARD ROOM, COSTA MESA, CA – MORNING, SEVEN MONTHS AGO DEAN SPANOS: [On the phone] Look, John, it’s just like…

  • Nobody’s Chargers 2023 Season Preview: The Happiest Place

    Nobody’s Chargers 2023 Season Preview: The Happiest Place

    August 31, 2023

    INTERIOR – DISNEYLAND PARKING LOT, ANAHEIM, CA – MORNING JUSTIN HERBERT: Oh boy oh boy! I’m so excited to finally get that authentic Hollywood…

  • Guttersnipe

    Guttersnipe

    November 1, 2022

    I woke up naked in a hotel room on Sunday morning covered in milk. There was nary a carton in sight. It was a…

  • Guttersnipe

    Guttersnipe

    September 27, 2022

    Today I have a tale of minimal importance. No, that’s not right. There is no import to speak of here. Certainly not the beer.…

  • Instant Hippo Mind-Go-Splodey

    Instant Hippo Mind-Go-Splodey

    January 24, 2022

    What the absolute fuck am I supposed to say about THAT?? I guess one could say we saw ONE guy break an all-time record. …

  • A Very Special Footballing 9/11 Thread

    A Very Special Footballing 9/11 Thread

    September 11, 2021

    Guten morgen, y’all.  I hope Santa brought everyone what they wanted this year.  20 years is apparently the fuckloads of leftover Murrikan high-tech weaponry…

  • Weeeeeeeee’ve Got A Diamond…In JOE BIDEN! Saturday Open Thread

    Weeeeeeeee’ve Got A Diamond…In JOE BIDEN! Saturday Open Thread

    November 7, 2020

    Editor’s Note:  Balls did not write this.  King Hippo did, but there was a scheduling error and this is our half-ass way of fixing…

  • Imaginary Coach Loses Imaginary Job

    October 5, 2020

    Or jobs, for that matter. Bill O’Brien is relieved of his duties for the Houston Football Team. Well, it’s only about 9 months too…

  • An Old Friend Comes Home

    An Old Friend Comes Home

    September 25, 2020

    INTERIOR – SOFI STADIUM LOCKER ROOM, LOS ANGELES, CA  – SUNDAY AFTERNOON [LOCKER ROOM DOOR FLIES OPEN] DR. DAVID CHAO: [Visibly stumbling] HI [hic]…

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[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

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