Hope Clicks Eternal – The Houston Texans

Before we progress, let's once again revisit the 0-1 2017 New England Patriots: Delicious. I very much enjoy the fact that Pat there has turned on the Patriots because "#22" took a knee, despite the fact that it was a Chief. I'm surprised she didn't call him a "thug". The appeals of

Your “Liars, Cheats, Addicts & Murderers” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: This year's Hall of Fame candidates were announced. There are 108 names in total eligible for shortlisting & unfortunate interviewing by Peter King. First timers are led by Randy Moss, Brian Urlacher, Ronde Barber and Ray Lewis, who I know would kill to be included in the Hall.

Your Saturday Evening Open Thread & Broadcast Coverage Discussion

  The one good thing about the Patriots opening the season on Thursday is that there's no Patriots game on Sunday. Oh sure, the pre-game shows can't help themselves, and after the GAME MANAGING they took Thursday night it'll be quite enjoyable, but thank heaven for tender mercies. Courtesy those hard-working maniacs

Your “Crimebeat!’ Is Going To Become A Daily Feature At This Point” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

You can start calling DFO the State Department, because as of this morning we've denied over 1900 Russians. NFL News: Both sides in the Ezekiel Elliott suspension have motions before federal court now. It's all based on who gets to be the court of record: Elliott's team (and team) are pushing

Your “What I Did On My Summer Vacation” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Not to brag, but I think the high school team my program's attached to just eliminated the Jets from playoff contention. NFL News: Hurricane Irma is playing havoc (HAVOC!) with the NFL's attempts to determine whether the Dolphins - Bucs game will be played. The League has four options - moving

Your “Tomorrow Might Not Be Here For You” Thursday Evening Open Thread

Slight hangover...no scratches or cuff marks...note from wife about snoring...VICTORY! NFL News: Ezekiel Elliott's appeal hearing has finally ended. Under the rules, the arbitrator has five working days to release his ruling. Pressure from both sides is coming to have it decided by Monday. Most of the comments under Schefter's tweet

HAPPY FUN BRAIN SCREAMING TIME: A Buffalo Bills Season Preview!

Holy shit, you guys, I can't remember going into a Bills regular season so stoked about their chances to Make Some Noise since... well, certainly since the expiration date on my collectable box of Flutie Flakes! Yes, it's been a long playoff drought. The Drought can now legally drive and get

Your “Final Day of the Beer Selling Season” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

Today is the last day of the regular season at The Nat, so forgive me if the preview is short. I'm excited because people will be throwing their unused gift certificates at us, and the kegs we don't drain we drink! I'm taking a cab home because I anticipate being

Your “No Problems Here – What Are You Talking About?”

NFL News: Tony Romo will miss Friday's Chiefs-Seahawks game because his son was born last night. Good for him. Little Jones McCoy Romo joins older brothers Hawkins & Rivers in the Romo playpen. I'm guessing the name is a tribute to JERRAL, and an unsilent thank-you for the bonus money

Your “Today I Settle All Family Business” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: Le'Veon Bell will return to the Steelers on September 1st: It's looking a tad more serious in New York, as reports are OBJ may miss the season opener at the Cowboys due to the ankle injury he picked up against the Browns. The MRI has revealed only a

Making Ezekiel: Your [DFO] Law and Fantasy Football Mailbag

By far the most common question submitted this week was about where you should take Ezekiel Elliot in your upcoming drafts.  The second most common question submitted was if it is ethically proper to take Zeke in the draft.   I'll take the second question first:  If you want to

YA BETTA SUE SOMEBODAYYYY: Your [DFO] Law and Fantasy Football Mailbag

Nazis! Suspensions! Nuclear War! Trades! What a week for questions about law and fantasy football!  Unsurprisingly, most of your law questions were about our Ululating Sack Of Wet FartsDear Leader and the legal ramifications of his relentless drive to make this world an even more terrible place than it already