Commentist Beer Barrel: Skål!

Denmark got a big Olympic win today, overcoming France for the gold medal in handball. I thought about burying the lede on this, in case any Commentists log onto the site while desperately avoiding Olympic handball spoilers, but… look, I just didn’t think that was very likely, y’know? I’ll apologize now if I was wrong.

Handball’s a hell of a lot of fun to watch. If you’ve never seen it, the spectator experience is thus: You’re watching basketball with faster ball movement and big ol’ goals at each end. It’s one of the two things I discovered while living in Copenhagen, in a kollegium (somewhere between a dormitory and an apartment building) on the island of Amager that are fun as hell to watch, the other being the so-bad-it’s-good Eurovision Song Contest. I’ve done a terrible job of following both since leaving Denmark, but each, in the company of friendly Danish students and frankly awful Danish beer, was a real blast at the time. I’m not kidding about the beer. The best of it was Carlsberg, and Carlsberg’s slogan at the time, “Probably the Best Beer in the World,” may be the most undeservedly kind thing anyone has ever said about anything.

Back to Amager: It’s home to ample farmland, the Copenhagen Airport, and the fairly famous anarchist squatter enclave of Christianshavn. It’s also been home, since 2007, to Amager Bryghus. Exactly when in 2007, I’m not sure; I’d hate to think I missed it while I was living so close. But the world of beer, I’ve found, is generous with second chances. Some time in the last week or two, Amager’s beers hit the Texas market, so today I can drink to the Danish victory with something a quite a bit nicer than Carlsberg. Or, what the hell, it’s their first handball championship. Two somethings!

The first something is Amager Bryghus Lawrence of Arabica, a collaboration with Gary, Indiana’s 18th Street Brewery, and more importantly, porter with coffee and oranges added. I know! I’ve never heard of such a thing either, but it immediately sounded awesome to me too. (If this didn’t sound awesome to you, please take a few moments to recalibrate your awesome sensors before continuing.) It’s a rich chocolate brown coming out of the bottle, and nearly black in the glass, and the head hangs around for a few minutes before dissipating. Lawrence of Arabica delivers beautifully on the coffee, but on first taste the orange eluded me entirely, and I’m not sure I did any better picking it up on subsequent sips. If it’s there, I think, it’s in various component parts of the flavor we think of as “orange,” not as the whole thing; there’s a bit of citric sharpness, a bit of fruity sweetness, but I had to look for both to find them, and I didn’t find them in the same place. In any case, this is a rich and satisfying beverage and a worthy weekend breakfast beer, whether you’re having breakfast in the morning like the kind of person who wants to have a productive weekend, or at three in the afternoon like lady snow and I just did. Breakfast is a state of mind, not a time of day, but naturally it helps if eggs are involved.

The second something is, like handball and the Eurovision Song Contest, a thing I remember thoroughly enjoying years ago. Let me explain: Not long ago (in 2011, officially, though they were selling beer before that), a farmhouse brewery named Jester King opened in the countryside southwest of Austin. One of their first beers was a Russian imperial stout called Black Metal, brewed with an English ale yeast and a healthy helping of hops. That original Black Metal was a means to an end for Jester King, which aimed from the beginning to brew beer using traditional European farmhouse methods, fermented with yeasts and bacteria native to the environment. And so later batches of Black Metal were made with a Belgian saison yeast, and then with a mix of Belgian saison yeast and local bugs. Those versions are good too! But since the first recipe change, I’ve missed the straightforward bombast of the original.

Well, Amager Bryghus brought the original back, with an unspecified “Danish twist” and the perfectly forthright name of Danish Metal. It’s near pitch-black, as it should be. And… I honestly can’t tell what’s going on with it. The base beer is recognizable and delicious after all these years, but, like, what is that fruity finish? Is the beer going sour? Is there actual fruit of some kind in it? Have they thrown in some house yeast alongside the English yeast? Does it matter? I like this version of the beer. Maybe not as much as OG Black Metal, which may at this point be lost in the sands of time, but I’m not going to complain when Amager puts its own spin on the stout and comes up with a worthy successor.

Enough from me: The person with the best palate in this household has some thoughts. lady snow?

lady snow says: Ooh, what is this?

make it snow says: Lawrence of Arabia.

lady snow says: Are you sure it’s not Arabica? There’s coffee in it, right?

make it snow says: Is that a kind of coff—[checks label] oh. [find-replaces “Lawrence of Arabia”]

lady snow says: That’s why I’m here. So, I definitely taste the coffee in it. But, like, I love coffee. I love coffee. So… is this a stout?

make it snow says: Porter. Strong porter. For all the difference there is, you know. How about the orange?

lady snow says: It definitely is a strong porter. Oh, there’s the orange! It tastes like when you get dark chocolates with orange in them.

make it snow says: I’ve had those, but not enough of them to really recognize it.

lady snow says: [stage whispering] I HAVE!

make it snow says: I guess I have to be really hit over the head with it, like with Southern Tier Choklat Oranj. Southern Tier really are masters of hitting you over the head with flavor.

lady snow says: Anything that combines coffee and reminding me of orange dark chocolate beers is the beer for me. It’s a very indulgent beer.

make it snow says: And the Danish Metal? I know you never had the old-school Black Metal.

lady snow says: I think it is more sour than a standard imperial stout.

make it snow says: Any ideas what’s causing that? I have it down to four possible things, three of which I’d have expected to be noted on the label: That it’s wine barrel-aged, that it’s had another strain of yeast intentionally introduced, that there’s some kind of fruit in it, or that it’s accidentally contaminated.

lady snow says: It doesn’t taste infected. But I don’t know about the other possibilities. Maybe it is barrel aging. Was it aged in wine barrels?

make it snow says: No one’s saying so, but that’s what it tastes the most like to me. I’m probably wrong. I don’t know. Is it good?

lady snow says: Yeah, it’s good! But I want to know what’s going on with it, too.

make it snow: Me too. It may just have to remain a mystery. At least it’s a delicious mystery!

tl;dr: Welcome to the real America, Denmark! (The real America is Texas, and also winning at team sports.)

Grade: Bunden i vejret eller resten i håret!

make it snow is an alot of beer who’s sad to see the Olympics come to a close tonight. This afternoon he and lady snow each poured themselves half a glass apiece of Lawrence of Arabica and Danish Metal, and make it snow drank the leftovers. If we’re all kind to each other, except when our competitive spirits make us feel like being assholes instead, we can make the Olympics last all year.

 

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makeitsnowondem
make it snow is an alot of beer. He is also a Broncos fan living in Denver.
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Porky Prime

I actually found Tuborg, the Beer of Danish Kings at a Big Lots in SoCal about a dozen years ago, along with a Belgian trippel I’d never seen before. Guess which one I actually bought.

Major disappointment when I discovered Big Lots in NM don’t sell booze.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh my God.

Thinking about that bit below about spilling booze on the counter and licking it up…

I am going to start pouring my drinks on a tortilla.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So we went ahead and bought more bourbon (and now I am drinking it). All is right with the world.

ALXMAC
ALXMAC

Thank you for letting me vent (;oP).

ALXMAC

Long form bitching session:

I’ve lived in a hotel that was converted into apartments for the past 3 years. One of the perks here is free laundry machines (there are 2 washers and 1 dryer in a room 15 feet from my front door). I usually would do laundry late on Sunday nights while watching Game of Thrones/SNF/etc. because it was a time no one else was using the machines and I like to start the work week fresh.

About 4 months ago this new guy moved in down the hall. He is

A: a clean freak that constantly washes his clothes/linens and goes through a bottle of bleach per week.

2: keeping serial killer hours – I go to bed at 2am and the machines are running. I get up at 7am and it’s still him doing laundry. This is not daily but sometimes up to 4 nights per week. He also likes to prop the door open I guess to be able to hear when the cycle is done from his front door down the hallway (did I mention that my room is right next to the laundry room?).

III. A passive-aggressive douche-nozzle. I went to do laundry at 8:45 tonight and I found almost dry clothes sitting in the 2 washers. Trying to be a good neighbor (I suspected but didn’t know that it they were his at the time), I gave it 2 hours and checked again at 10:45. They were still there so I started throwing them into a laundry basket and just as I get done removing it and loading the washer he walked in through the door.

JerBear50

You sure he doesn’t work nights? On my nights off I still stay on the same sleep schedule, so it’s not unusual for me to be doing that kind of stuff all night. I’m also in a house though so I’m not disturbing anyone.

ALXMAC

Oh he often works nights but that’s not what upset me – this wasn’t the 1st time that I’d found someone else’s (not always his, but usually) laundry for a few hours or more.

ALXMAC

The crux of the problem is that tonight, he said “if I find clothes in the washer, I usually move them to the dryer.”

SO I”M DOING YER LAUNDRY NOW?!?

JerBear50

1) don’t leave your laundry for hours at a time 2) what if it’s stuff that’s not supposed to be dried?

JerBear50

Yeah, fuck this guy. Feel free to stuff him down the garbage chute.

JerBear50

Yeah, that’s shitty. I understand not wanting to wait around for the washer and I love having the convenience of leaving it to handle at my leisure, but that’s a dick thing to do in an apartment, especially with a limited number of machines.

ALXMAC

Instead of “selfish”, I said it was “inconsiderate”. Trying to take the high road here…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If “passive-agressive” is your game, you should make a point of loudly dictating to your phone to set an alarm (for laundry if appropriate, but whatever works depending on the situation) for sixty minutes or whatever.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Alright, all the duchesse is gone and I have to work in the am. Night, all.

ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Tim and Dawn were 100 times better than Jim and Pam. Much too lazy to add anything else to that. Going back to another vid of the show because I am sticking with my lazyness angle.

https://youtu.be/mXytRC0k-K8?t=94

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Also, snow, this was an excellent review, chock full of history and insights from your lady. I raise a duchesse to you in your honor.

/spills expensive beer on shirt
//sucks on shirt

JerBear50

I hate that few seconds when after I spill my beer on the counter, I have to stop and think if I’ve had any raw meat on the counter before I just lean forward and slurp it up anyways.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Quit beating off on the counter!

http://media.giphy.com/media/Y2rYvMTi17O7K/giphy.gif

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I just like that scene.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

“She’s gone”

“She’s dead”

“She’s not dead”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening. Just back from a solid night capped at Avery. What’s up around these parts?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I think the easiest description is I am being an asshole and other people are just around. Assume that and you will be fine.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am gonna sing Free love Freeway 9 more times because I love that song. I also might track down my BBC office DVDs

JerBear50

Also spiders and snakes and such. What was flowing at Avery? I’ll drink the shit out of Reverend and Kaiser.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I had some reverend. The ladyfriend loves Liliko’i Kepolo, so we got some of that, some White Rascal, the Radlerado was fruity but really nice, tried the Mile Chai (meh), tasted the Rumpkin and Pump(KY)n, and then closed with the Eremita IX (one of my favorite sours) and tasted the Certatio Equestris.

I go there almost every trip out here. Love it.

JerBear50

I don’t know that I’ve had any of their regular beers, just some bombers of the big boys. And as disappointed as I am that pumpkin-everything season is rolling around at least it means I also get my Fest beers.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JerBear50

What hump?

JerBear50

I really wish I could find some of their big stouts down here. I’ve never seen them but they sound great. By which I mean 15% abv sounds great.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
ALXMAC
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I mean I get I couldn’t do what they do… actually I could do what they do and I think they knew it even back then

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

“It sounds a bit gay’

“It’s not gay”

JerBear50

I really wish him and Merchant would go back to writing TV together instead of making shitty movies and so-so standup.

Brocky

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JerBear50

Man, wrestling girls have gotten WAYYYYYY hotter than when I watched as a kid. We had Elizabeth and Scary Sherry and I think that was about it.

Brocky

once they went away from catering to kids, the flood gates were open.

a flood of underage nan yoghurt that is

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Not sure if this one is ok for me to post as a white guy. I love the line so I am risking it

http://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_llftb5C2ES1qbkopso1_400.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It makes it funnier; at least you are conscious of it.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Gratliff

comment image

Brock Lesnar is may be a bit out of control right now.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And since it is so very appropriate for Beer Barrel…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Let’s make this a DOUBLE SHOT, sort of.

JerBear50

Different style, similar theme.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOiyksNlrY0

theeWeeBabySeamus

Good, now I don’t feel so bad for posting this one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fT78hveC_Ow