INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
The PRODUCER is seated at the console, setting things up for the day’s show. DJ 3000 relaxes nearby.
DJ 3000: So who’s the guest for today?
PRODUCER: [looks up] Oh, actually it’s quite the get.
DJ 3000: We’re closing out the season in style?
PRODUCER: Very much so.
RECEPTIONIST: [via intercom] Your guest for today is here.
PRODUCER: Wonderful, wonderful. Send him in.
— [door flies open] —
The PRODUCER looks up from the console as he continues to hit buttons and slide controls into position.
PRODUCER: Mr. Kraft, welcome, thank you so much for joining us. I just have a couple adjustments left to make before…
BOB KRAFT: [dreamily watching the PRODUCER work as though hypnotized] My God. That’s amazing.
PRODUCER: Oh, it’s not as complex as it looks, there’s just a few…
KRAFT: No, no, your hands! The way your they fly around that console. Such dexterity! [gets a faraway look in his eyes] Why, with hands like that you, you could…
PRODUCER: [finishes setting things up and stands] All set! If you could just head into the booth…
KRAFT: First, a handshake.
PRODUCER: [uncomfortably] Uh…okay.
The PRODUCER offers his hand for a handshake, and BOB KRAFT grasps it with both of his own hands and holds it firmly.
KRAFT: My goodness. They feel even more beautiful than they look!
PRODUCER: Um…
KRAFT: [still holding] Such smooth skin. And what a grip!
PRODUCER: [starting to squirm slightly] Yes, yes, very nice to meet you.
KRAFT: [still holding] You must do some kind of forearm exercises.
PRODUCER: [looks at DJ 3000 for help, who says nothing but a small red light on his console labeled “laughter” begins flashing silently] Just some occasional tennis. Listen, why don’t we…
KRAFT: You know, we really could use someone with such…strong hands…working for me.
PRODUCER: No, really, I…
KRAFT: In my organization, I mean. You see, I make a great many investments, and I often find that my advisers are far to eager to exit our positions prematurely. They have “weak hands”, as it were. Now, before we get to the radio show, I do have a bit of a special request.
PRODUCER: Well, we’ll see what we can…
KRAFT: If you could just tickle the ring a little bit?
PRODUCER: [glances down at the Super Bowl LIII ring that KRAFT is sporting, glances back up]
KRAFT: No, not that ring. [winks]
PRODUCER: [is horrified]
KRAFT: [finally releases the PRODUCER’s hand] Ha ha ha ha! Just a joke, man. Relax!
PRODUCER: [audibly sighs with relief]
KRAFT: I wasn’t kidding about having a special request, though. Do you have some gaffer tape?
PRODUCER: Um…sure.
The PRODUCER opens a drawer in his desk and pulls out a roll. He hands it to KRAFT, who theatrically stretches out a section with a snap, then turns and places it over the video camera on DJ 3000’s front control panel.
DJ 3000: HEY!
KRAFT: Sorry about that, old sport. But I’ve learned my lesson, and I would prefer not to have any cameras capturing what’s about to happen in here. [turns to the PRODUCER] Now. Are you familiar with the expression “knob turner”…?
—
Today’s topic is “in good hands”. We’re looking for songs about hands and the things that hands do, like grabbing things, holding on to things, etc. I’ll get us started with a DOUBLE SHOT from The Smiths. This is the last Request Line of the season, so there are no limits today. Have at it!
[…] WATSON: Nah, the directions Bob Kraft gave me were really easy to […]
[…] DJ 3000: [displays link] […]
[…] Clean” and the topic was going to be hands. But we did that one a while back when Bob Kraft stopped by. And then I thought “things that are clean” but realized that we’ve […]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbANp9cRd6o
Ah I should have thought of this one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzbcSny5r-g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUDZD0ZAk1Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svWINSRhQU0
https://youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=8lVqEchxIxw
Wish this one didn’t remind me of an ex as much as it does:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=fTkHFQC3wow&feature=youtu.be