I went to CharCon over the past weekend, and did more walking and more drinking than I’ve done in a long time. The whole experience was a whirlwind of befriending strangers, teaching my board game, discussing pop culture topics, learning other peoples’ games, and refilling drinks. I came home fulfilled and exhausted. The days that followed were likely the least productive days of my entire stretch of unemployment. I’d finished Bakuman, the manga I’d been voraciously reading, and nothing else felt quite right to latch onto. I didn’t have motivation to work on board game stuff, I didn’t want to exercise or watch what I was eating, and no video games excited me particularly much. Ordinarily I’d call that the old familiar face of depression coming to visit, but I felt satisfied with myself overall. A little self-reflection told me I was probably just tired and needed a bit to recharge my batteries. Fair enough, but there’s no feeling quite like the need to do creative work but having no gas in the tank for it. The experience becomes a slog not unlike shoveling wet concrete into a hole – unpleasant, slow-moving, sweaty, work. I’m no stranger to that kind of work but it’s a harsh contrast against my usual fervor for creative projects. Instead of the usual daily victories, all I’ve accomplished this week was to draw a storyboard for a friend’s comic that he wants to make.

NFL training camps started this week, which is a welcome harbinger for the oncoming season. I bought tickets to go see Jets @ Broncos in October, with my longtime friend and Jets fan. Neither of us think our QBs are the answer but if we get to October and are competitive, we’ll be glad to have that trip booked. Even if we suck, I know how to have a good time in the Mile High City. One of the many creative things I wanted to do but haven’t forced to happen yet is to make up an itinerary and map of where we’re going and what we’re doing. Meow Wolf, Daniels Park, 16th Street Mall, Cherry Creek restaurants, there’s plenty to account for.

I start work on Monday, back at the company where I was laid off back in April. I’m definitely excited to be back and I look forward to contributing again. Part of me is anticipating the repeated welcome back conversation, and I’m going to need stamina to get through that. It’s fun to go through it with a couple people but I’m bound to have that conversation a great number of times for the first couple weeks. I’ve also got some new aspects of the company’s work to learn. That’s definitely going to keep my interest – our products are fascinating, and there’s plenty to enjoy about that learning process. I do think it’ll take some time to ‘learn to work’ again. These past 3 months have solidified a new daily routine for me, and while it hasn’t shifted the timetables much from a standard workday, I had complete freedom when it came to the day’s subject matter. Want to make a card game today? Go for it! Want to read 17 hours of manga today? Go nuts! TWO NAPS? SLEEP AWAY SLEEPYHEAD! It’ll take some readjustment to live off of an outlook calendar again, but I’m sure it won’t take too long.

I do worry that my creative output will dip significantly once I’m back to work. That’s to be expected, for sure, but I’ve set my sights on kickstarting my board game by September, and it’ll be much more challenging with a restricted schedule. I believe I can do it, but it’s going to be at the expense of all my other side projects. Thankfully, it’ll also coincide with the start of the NFL season which means I’m going to be fully inspired and motivated to write weekly football stories again. I can’t wait for that feeling.

That’s all from my desk for this week. Have a wonderful weekend!

Alex