Instant Hippo Thoughts – Divisional Round, 2024 Season

Last Days of Disco, indeed.  And even in matches where my preference is only mild – all *my* sides take it up the poop chute.

Pour one out for the 500s, boned by The Narrator in Kansas City.  Then the poor Fuck LioUns, where Baby Buster did some…unfortunate things, both before and after his pretty obvious concussionback spasms.

Maybe there’s a limit to how far a “redemption arc” can go?  Touch of Downs hit the concrete wall of January even harder than Buster did, as you will recall.  And Geno has piloted back-to-back “last team out” of the playoff field.  I dunno, just a festering hypothesis within my idjit brain.

I will say this – Jayden Daniels is a cold-blooded assassin out there.  Very, very impressive.

I napped through the first half of Iggles/RRRRRRRRRAM IT!!  So sue me.  Conditions got increasingly snowy, especially during Q4.  Philly’s front four were the difference in the game, along with Saquon.  LA barely did anything until very late (after a long Saquon run to put the margin up to 13), when they had to go hurry up.  Iggles couldn’t sub (well, they COULD have if Sirianni had the brain capacity to use a timeout) and they got winded.  Rams score inside of 3:00 to close to within 28-22.

It started to seem like maybe that last PHI missed extra point would come back to haunt them.  In between handoffs on the ensuing possession, they tried a play action fake that turned disastrous.  The sack yardage forced a 3 and out, and The Gospel According to Fatthew could add to his own redemption arc with one last drive.  They got inside the 20, then took a deadly sack of their own.  Incomplete (under duress) on 4th and 11 ends things, Philly will host the Commies next Sunday.  Remember when the NFC East was the Special Needs Division?  Good times.

We don’t get a lake effect blizzard in WNY, because God hates us now.  And whaddaya gon’ do – He’s NOT WRONG.  After a brilliant opening drive, Lamar! made an oopsie doodle, then did that thing where he tries too hard to make up for it.  Everything went sideways, and the Narrator daggered us with a horrific DPI call that allowed BUF to go into the half at 21-10.

Heavier dosage of el Tractorcito got Balmer back into it in Q3, closing to within 21-19.  But they’d never get over the hump, punctuated by a killer Mark Andrews fumble, driving down 5.  Apparently, just his 2nd lost fumble as a professional.  Oy.

The day would get worse for Andrews.  Needing the octopus, starting from his own 12 – Lamar! led a beautiful TD drive, all on the strength of his arm.  And Andrews dropped the 2-point coversion.  Bills advance to get ass-fucked in Arrowhead next week, 27-25.

Happy Martin Luther th’ King Day, for all who celebrate.  I guess that’s the whole Clubhouse except (somewhat ironically) Blax, due to Arizona-ness.