Back From Getting Milk

Hello!

Despite what RTD may have told you, I didn’t get lost on my way home from the corner store. For the past 8 months I’ve been living the highest highs and lowest lows of my entire life. I have a tiny window of calm (about 5 days) and I wanted to share what’s been going on.

First and foremost, I broke my back. Well, worse than it already was. I’ve had chronic low back pain for about 15 years after I sustained a super cool guy injury in college. It was never enough to get insurance to cover anything, though I did once pay out of pocket for a nerve ablation. Anyway, one morning I woke up and attempted to stand out of bed, but instead ended up in a pain-wracked heap, my entire low back and right leg feeling as if Niska from Firefly had put those under-skin cables into my body. From that episode where Wash is jealous of Mal for having a close relationship with Zoe? If you know, you know. It didn’t tickle.

I was rushed to the emergency room and got the good drugs. Then I was told that my L5S1 disc herniated enough to pinch my sciatic nerve, and unless I lost feeling in my dick I wouldn’t be receiving emergency surgery. Instead, I’d need to wait 3 FUCKING MONTHS. Once the pain subsided, I was left without feeling in almost all of my right leg. This was inconvenient, as I was set to fly to Italy in two days, on a vacation that I’d been planning and saving up for since before Covid.

I went anyway. They told me that walking could only really help the situation, but to be fair I couldn’t sit or stand comfortably, had a hard time controlling my leg since I couldn’t feel it, and I’d planned this trip as a sort of casual take on the Amazing Race – 2 days in Milan, 1 day in Andermatt Switzerland, 2 days in Interlaken, 3 days in Dusseldorf, 2 days in Amsterdam. It was super fun and super stupid and I’d do it again on one leg. Thank God for painkillers.

While in Germany I managed to finally land a publisher for the board game I wrote about early last year, Notebook Nations (at the time I was writing about it, I think it was called Tiny Conflicts). Of course, I started shopping Notebook Nations when there were only two factions complete, and the publisher wanted EIGHT. So while waiting for surgery, my team and I got to work. Eventually the day came for me to go under. The surgery was successful! I’m 10 weeks into recovery now and have less pain now than any time in the last decade, it’s awesome. Apparently the average amount of disc material removed during one of these procedures is 3cm, and they removed 7cm from me. Neat!

I’ve had to be extremely careful all year, since due to the size of my disc eruption site, I am highly likely to re-herniate. No problems there so far. However, since my nerve was pretty significantly damaged, I’m still getting electroshocks from it on occasion. Apparently it could take as long as six months before those stop happening. I’m off the pain killers though, so that’s something. This is all relatively well timed given that I have bariatric surgery in 3 weeks.

Yes, back in January of 2024 I went in complaining about back pain and the surgeon I met told me I should go talk to a bariatric surgeon. So I did. And then I started prepping for gastric bypass, but that takes a very long time. So I finished bariatric prep in like August, my back gave out in September, I went to Europe and got a publisher, got surgery in January, finished Notebook Nations on March 1st, and my bariatric surgery is now coming up in April. I start a liquid only diet next Friday, do that for two weeks, then have surgery which will keep me in a liquid diet for another six weeks.  I’ll eat solids again in June, just in time to promote my game at Gen Con and then publish in July. I’m also working on the next game now but that’s a story for another time.

OK but the reason I’m here is because I wanted to share the lore that I wrote for Notebook Nations! It’s a 4x game that reveals a hidden world full of cute, tiny, dopey little guys who all fight over a magic resource that gives them life. I wrote an intro establishing the ‘narrator’ of the game, a Naturalist and researcher modeled after Henry David Thoreau (think of him like a kind Gargamel and all the nations are different kinds of smurfs). Then I wrote an entry from him about each nation. What follows is that material from his field notebook. Thanks for reading about my escapades, and I hope to be back soon.

NOTEBOOK NATIONS

It is June 1862, and in my attempts to satisfy my fascination with nature I have decided to undertake an expedition into the wilds behind my homestead. This new continent is full of wonders, and there’s a thrill to being so isolated in open land – it’s quite the change from the stuffy offices of my old university back across the Atlantic. I will keep notes of what I find and sketch what I can.

It is September now. I thought to take a moment to speak on what a strange and unexpected experience this has been. Only a few minutes beyond where I cleared brush for my home, the forest opens up to a serene glade with gentle hills and short grass. It was here that I made the most bizarre discovery: a miniature world was alive below me. The ground was teeming with little creatures who were feverishly at work, clearing grass, building structures, and even warring amongst themselves! I became distracted from my larger expedition and filled my notebook with several pages worth of observations about the diverse life forms I saw. I’ve traveled back to this place countless times in the months since my last entry, and I expect that practice to continue. I am amazed and enthralled by this place!

November. The glade is home to an unfamiliar natural resource that I’ve taken to calling “source,” for which the little nations fight to secure access. Review my notebook for descriptions of these nations and their leaders. The situation is ever changing, and each time I visit there have been dramatic developments in the borders and populations around the source. I managed to scoop some into a phial (the creatures were not pleased) and am studying it. It seemed entirely uninteresting at home, but when I returned it to the ground of the glade, it took less than a day before it was surrounded by life and activity.

Mushroom Tribes: When I first traveled to this place, it took little time for me to stumble upon these tiny mushroom creatures. Their primary function in the ecosystem is clearly decomposition, that much is obvious. What surprised me, though, was the ease at which they make more dead things. Improvised weapons and strength of numbers can get them quite far in combat and on the hunt. Truthfully I assumed they grew like the mushrooms in my homeland, but it appears they hatch from large egg clutches laid in decomposing matter. Lovely. I suppose they are kind of cute, though, and their ecological niche is a vital one.
The bravest warriors of the mushroom tribe risk their lives to attempt to mount the wasps which frequent their hatcheries. The wasp is vicious, but I’m sure there’s no greater honor than to tame it as your own and ride it into battle.

Thimble Empire: Ah yes, these delightful fellows! I’ve never actually seen one with its little thimble helmet off, but I imagine they’re cute under there. Their precociousness and ingenuity are remarkable, as is their honorable nature. They wish only to be left to their research it seems, though they’re wise enough to train defenses for the inevitable and they take plenty of time away for fishing. They make a lot of cloth from the pink-budded flowers near their home, which I’ve seen strewn about through trade (or theft?) amongst nearly all their neighbors.
On occasion I’ve caught a particularly dazzling knight busying itself with the affairs of the nation. I make a poor field researcher at times, but I do think of these things as a sort of kingdom, and I wonder if the leadership of their Royal Thimble can guide them to the goals they seek.

Seed Children: These sentient seeds are vital to the perpetuation of life in this land of source. They sow with their very bodies the forests which house so many beings, or serve as fuel and food for so many others. It comes as no surprise that they subsist on farming – though I try not to think too hard about the crops they’re harvesting from the kin they’ve planted. Instead I spend my time documenting their bizarre cultural practices, which include the younger and simpler seeds dressing themselves up to look like the larger seed druid which seems to watch over them.
All the foliage in these parts seems to match the scale of these little seed children, which leaves me to wonder. Could that seed druid have come from a larger, more wild-grown nation of seed people? I have no good evidence for this as of yet but I hope to learn more as I continue my research.

Hummingbird Republic: I discovered the most ornate creatures when I went to inspect a source pool today. These delicate and tiny birds drink source from goblets and enjoy listening to each others’ music. In fact, they are richly cultured – they wear fine clothing and masks, devote an outdoor space to reading, and even play sports.
The best dressed of them was quite eye-catching. I’ve noticed that source tendrils are growing like feathers from its body. It doesn’t seem discomfited by the growths, and actually it appears to be quite popular. That said, I do worry that consuming all that source could be detrimental to their health.

Ember Spirits: Of all the beings on this bizarre continent of source, I feel genuine pity for this one most. I’ve spotted a lone candleperson haunting the ruins of what, at least some time previously, must have been a rather imposing nation. The fellow appears in decent spirits, all things considered. He’s been conjuring little ember spirits in what I gather is a bid to keep himself company. They’re adorable to be sure, but their nature makes them a bit unwieldy, over-curious, and more than half a pinch mischievous.
To his credit, this candleperson has been replanting and tending to the patches of scorched earth that his pets leave behind. I’m bound by my professional duty not to disturb him, though it’d be a lie if I said I wasn’t tempted to borrow some of his many books so that I might learn more about what these ruins used to be.

Merhamster Kingdom: Finding these odd fish-mammals was quite the unexpected surprise. What’s more, their architectural and scientific prowess has surpassed mine. I’d say that the reliance on science made them lazy, except that their constant need for water has kept them hard at work. Perhaps too hard at work – it appears that their efforts to expand have flooded several parts of the glade and led to some ecological disorder.
There is an elder mer-hamster who serves as king and also as teacher. He has a joyous air about him and seems quite adept at the implementation of his culture’s scientific discoveries. I have seen him teleporting his fellows back and forth, and I even caught him addressing some of the flooding. He certainly gets a lot of things done!

Snowy Alliance: I had the chance to travel out further than I’d been previously, and I came to a harsh, wintery place. Life from the source lands had spread this far too. The beings I found here were hardy and stoic. Unlike other nations I’d identified, their acts of daily life appeared to be a significant struggle, and so all the different species had banded together to survive. I do wonder if, thanks to the lack of prolific source here, even the weather is affected. The only place I’ve seen these creatures comfortable is around a hot spring I discovered as I left.
The strongest amongst them was a catlike creature. I observed it teaching the others how to hunt with stealth techniques, but it also spent a lot of time alone. I admire the tenacity and willpower of this band of beings.

Sandy Swarm: On another excursion further from home, I stumbled upon a patch of arid desert. What I saw there shook the foundations of my understanding of this place. In the desert, working in unison and high spirits, was a colony of brightly colored bugs. I observed their work for a time and it became clear that their primary goal was to spread source all around the sand. Over time, plants grew in the spots they’d worked. Is it possible these bugs were responsible for proliferating life throughout the land?
The largest bug moved very little, but appeared to control the others. That explained the impressive organization of their behaviors. It also spent a lot of its time near the largest source pool. I suspect that it uses source both for nutrition and for terraforming purposes.

Frau mit Milchkannen auf einer Alm, Heiligenblut, Nationalpark Hohe Tauern, Kärnten, Österreich

OK BYE!

Alex

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Alex_Demote
Game designer, junk collector, paint chip taste tester
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WCS

Uncle Board Game finally came back with his pack of cigarettes!

Seriously, great to see you’re back, man. Hang in there. Everything that sucked is building toward a hell of a payoff.

Game Time Decision

Keep kicking ass Alex

Doktor Zymm

Merhamsters sound adorable and they can teleport? Awesome.

Not quite the same level, but I did once go on a trip to Italy and Malta a couple days after sustaining a pretty severe high ankle sprain. Was also totally worth it!

Gumbygirl

I vomited right in front of the entrance to Pompeii.

King Hippo

Hey, gotta vomit SOMEWHERE ya know??

blaxabbath

comment image

-Chip Kelley, finishing the part about getting care for a back injury

Last edited 1 day ago by blaxabbath
blaxabbath

No! Miami Dolphins medical staff finishing that part!

ballsofsteelandfury

So, the air conditioning guy is here to do maintenance on our system and the furnace is right next to my bedroom door and I’m almost positive he took a peek inside and thought, “Is that a butt pillow?!?”

Gumbygirl

Give him a keychain as a tip!

ArmedandHammered

Really cool! Glad you are back!

Gumbygirl

Alex! We’ve missed you. I’m glad you’re feeling better, and congratulations to you for your board game and the successful surgery.The bariatric surgery should be a breeze after that! I’m going to reread this, but it seems to me I would enjoy the Hummingbird lifestyle

2Pack

Way to stay with it and power through. Now rehab fully nice and slow.

ballsofsteelandfury

So what you’re saying is you have extra pills?

– K. Hippo

Seriously, congratulations on getting over the health issues and the success of the game!