No scheduler means I wait to type this whenever I get up and feel almost sentient. Hippo apologizes for the inconvenience.
Macro-level, I am content. The games were compettive (except the 2nd half of P*ts/Clips, which I didn’t watch anyway) and played at a very high level (similar qualifier for P*ts/Clips). It was knife’s edge, proper January football. Quite satisfying.
Saturday started with a Black Panthers Party, and I credit Wee Bryce and normal-sized palz – they showed up, and fought until the end. They just couldn’t get explosives in desperation mode, nor could they pressure The Gospel According to Fatthew on his game-winning drive. But I am less certain that Young can’t be the semi-franchise starter in Charlotte, though the risk of “commiting to limbo” (like Miami did with Tua) looms ominously. Anyway, RRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! will travel to Chi**** next weekend, after a 34-31 win.
“I can’t believe they pulled this shit again” is what the Packers fan you know is still mumbling, a day and a half later. Maybe go easy on the poor bastard, in case he snaps? 21-3 Packers at the half turned into a 31-27 Bearistocrats! victory, despite inconsistent (to put it charitably) QB play by the comebackers. It was weird, as we all know.
For once, the carpet matched the drapes – we all expected the most from Jaguras/Bills Mafia, and each side delivered and did so in spades. Prison Girlfriend dropped the soap a few times, but for the most part was able to match Brokeback’s overall brilliance. But timing is everything, and Buffalo bled all but the final minute on its last drive, for the 27-24 win. Perhaps most significantly, they had a goodkickoff/coverage combo, to keep Duuuuuval from feeling like they had any momentum. PG promptly threw a first play pickerception, and thus it ends. Buffalo will go to Donks-land (scary), and a nation prays for snow.
Iggles/Tomsulas was not quite as consistently high-level, but fuck a duck, perhaps even more dramatic. I don’t know how Santa Clara keeps getting off the mat and competing, but by fuck they surely so do. Philly’s toxic dressing room bled onto the pitch multiple times (mostly looking atyou, AJ Brown), but more than anything, the Walking Ded (add George Kittle to their very long list) were just not going to be denied. THIS round, anyway. Third-string defense rose up to stop Hurts on 4th and 11 near the red zone, for the 23-19 win. Santa Clara goes back to Seattle next weekend, one presumes for their final reckoning.
New England led Clippers du Merde 6-3 at the half but fuck it. I was done. Fortunately, so were the Clips, who went on to lose in semi-blowout fashion, 16-3. At least the Divisional Round is Harbaugh-free?
Until next week/round!
So I think I’ve worked out how you could drown someone with air. If you had some really moist, really clean air you could supercool it and the water would remain in gaseous form because there wouldn’t be any condensation nuclei. Then when someone breathed it in the water would condense out upon contact, including upon contact with lung tissue.
But it condensed into water, so they techically would have still drowned with water, not air. Just stick a funnel in their mouth and pour water in it until they aspirate it eventually. You supervillains make everything so complicated!
Seriously. Just toss me in the volcano and be done with it.
STOP TELLING US YOUR PLANS BEFORE EXECUTING YOUR PLANS!!!
/insert Bond villain four-minute monologue meticulously explaining evil plot in detail
Over a five-course meal. You’re evil, not uncivilized.
Just replace the air with pure oxygen. Best case, boom. Worst case, oxygen toxicity.
But if the air was that cold, wouldn’t it instantly freeze the lung tissue, resulting in death by asphyxia, but not drowning?
The city just feels more jazzed, charged than usual today. You can hear it in callers’ voices, even when they’re calling for “emergencies.” I’m positive I’m going to end up being mandated tonight, so yinz’ll get the full WCS Playoff Weirdness.
NOW WITH MORE VEHICLE COLLISIONS AND COPD FLARE-UPS!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0Zso2zx6Tk&list=PLWnwFAnZO1AHnVyPqRMvJ2QWgXOqRs0Sn
Will there be more fender benders leaving the stadium if they win or if they lose?
Yes.
Pittsburgh in Playoff High (Artistic
Interpretation)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uenR7X0solA&pp=ygUbc25sIHNjYXJsZXR0IGpvaGFuc3NvbiBuZXdz
I see the Falcons have acknowledged their mistake and redoing the uniforms.
I don’t get it.
It’s a frame of someone removing the jersey with the date April 2026.
Oh, removing. Sorry. I was on my phone.
I still don’t get it.
This is what the Atlanta Falcons organization thinks about their currently assigned uniform combinations.
Oh yeah ok. It is a bad uniform
You know what our problem is? We sit on our fat asses all damn weekend, and eat too much. Not to mention the drinking ,smoking, and pill popping. Let’s get moving!
https://youtu.be/2mcsVgIU1K0?si=VLSxnAJH1SP7ANYK
I remember doing PT to this in grade school. It comes back to mind from time to time.
Me too!
I don’t see the resemblance. Andy may have lost four playoff games in a row, but at least he made it to four playoff games in his first four years (five if you count the one he got hurt and couldn’t play in).
BTW, life hack: Siri can read these out for you. Not the wackiest, but still.
What, the posts? I don’t want the voice I associate with our sovereign to sound like Siri. He is a majestic aquatic mammal, not a slightly bitchy woman with an artificial yet bland, could be from anywhere accent. Hippo in my head is more like Brian Blessed.
Other than Niners@Seabirds, where I think the best we can hope for is a game that’s nawt too embarrassing, I think we got a good set of matchups for next week. Rams@Bears could be a shootout which would be fun. I’m hoping for Texans@NE, although if Tomlin can voodoo it against the Imaginarios then maybe they wouldn’t totally fold next week? And who doesn’t want to see Josh Allen trying to keep up with however many points Dobbins/Harvey score? Hopefully in the snow!
Goooo Imaginarios!
For some reason I feel invested in seeing Seattle kick the shit out of Santa Clara. It’s a shame TPS Report’s tickets are so expensive. Also, I’d probably just make an ass of myself again.
It should def be a fun game for the home crowd, maybe wait till last minute and see if prices come down? That’s my plan for the Bears game
I’m nervous for the niners game. They’re going to score more than 3 this time and Darnold is still very special.
I would be more nervous that even the proximity to the Niners might cause random knee explosions among the Seahawks and fans
I wish I didn’t nap through the Bills game. I couldn’t have cared less about the Niners/Eagles or Chargers/Pats aside from “Fuck New England,” so of course, my stellar record of good judgment remains unblemished.
So far the playoffs sans Chiefs have been stupendous. I hope this carries on and The Shield takes notice and ensures that Kansas City never sullies our postseason ever again.
Though I do have some concerns – and the egregiously missed facebask call on Ladd stands as evidence – that the Patriots have reestablished themselves as BEERGH’s favorite and will be rewarded accordingly.
At least I think it was Ladd. I don’t remember. BUT YOU ALL SAW IT!
Yeah, that was particularly bad
Don’t forget Herbert getting hit in the head and then taking a late hit with the defender’s full body weight on him. On the same play.
They were pretty clearly trying to avoid calling much around the line of scrimmage (note the lack of holding penalties) but that was an egregious no-call. Although I won’t complain if they let the Texans get away with stuff like that tonight
I will.
I would expect nothing less from the Steelers contingent, even if it is Qaaron. Hope y’all get a less podcastery QB next year
Me too. We’ve had a really bad run of signal callers, this weirdo, Rudolph the Racist Reindeer, and Rapey Ben ( harf). But we’re stuck with him, so let’s go Steelers!
This was my most dad reaction after yesterdays loss by my Jaguras:
“For once the carpet matched the drapes – we all expected the most”…
Whenever i hear this joke, i always think of the crude implication of asking this to a bald woman
Every time I’ve started to respond to this, call comes in and I get distracted for 45 minutes until I re-scroll and remember.
Talk about playing to the part; she looks every bit the part of royalty, and damn does it work. Trust me, I know.
Why? I mean, wouldn’t it be more fun if you try a bottle of absinthe and some proper psychedelics?
…or even some improper psychedelics, like guatamalen insanity peppers, fer instance.
That’s just House of Pain though!
/On indefinite hiatus until I actually write old, old write ups, or get some new sauces
He’s back!!
NASA picture of the day agrees
Dammit, attach!
.
Oh laws, it’s contagious! And hey, it’s bk109, all the way from Ireland! Or is it Sweden? Or Bulgaria? How the hell are you?
maybe he’s from the future as the scheduler’s broken
time is a flat circle
Technically speaking, at the time I popped by I was in Bergamo, because time is in fact a flat circle.
You can fly Ryanair on student class (12 hours between connections) or 20years “private”, but at the end of the day, weather delay catches you invariably in Bergamo 😀