Yeah, I know westies, it’s still morning out there. But for just once could those of us in the eastern time zones pretend that the world revolves around us? [runs away while giggling]
TO THE GAMES!
Fins/Bills:
I’ll actually tune in here and there for this one just to watch Josh Allen’s What Will He Do Next? Show. A sixty yard bomb? An intercept on a screen pass? A thirty yard scramble that nets five yards? All of these and more are on the table. He can do it all.
Jags/Bengals:
Auden Tate was targeted 10 times last week. It’s as though Dalton has no one else to throw to. Okay, maybe Mixon out of the backfield but that’s about it. The draft picks received by Jax are not expected to play today-one has tweaked an ankle and the other just needs to get up to speed on the defensive schemes.
Vikes/Lions:
Minny has won two straight and the Lions have lost two. The former need this one badly otherwise they’ll go 0-3 in the division. Odds are it’ll be close because all of Detroit’s games have been decided by 4 points or less.
Raiders/Packers:
Scanning the waiver wire looking for help? Green Bay’s wr corps are all kinds of banged up and someone named Allen Lazard came to the fore last week and caught everything thrown his way. You best scoop him up while he’s still in His Majesty’s good graces-2 weeks from now he may fall out of favour for tying his shoelaces incorrectly or somesuch.
Texans/Colts:
J.J. “Look at Me” Watts has found his form again with all kinds of hurries, hits and pressures. All that and 5 sacks to boot. Brissett is slowly but surely opening up his play-calling and the O is benefiting.
Cards/Giants:
Kyler and Daniel have some things in common, one of which is multiple articles written about them that goes something like this:”Rookie QB’s Are Playing Like Rookie QB’s”. Comparisons of all sorts will run amok today just like David and Saquon. The first one to 125 combined yardos wins.
Niners/Potato Skins:
San Franny is so committed to the run that ever since Coleman returned from injury both he and Breida are top 25 in carries per game. Is rook wr McLaurin matchup-proof? Today we find out. My bet is “no”.
Rams/Falcons:
Will Jalen stop the bleeding in the Rams secondary? Perhaps not immediately-doctors have officially declared that wound ‘suppurating’.
Have at it.
I’d date her mirror image but she seems one dimensional.
Progress. Andy Dalton threw an incompletion.
Well THAT was a bad idea
Yes, the milk WAS beyond the expiration date.
Buttchinski time!
“Butt chinski.” Search.
I agree. That almost demands a Balls search.
I think the Schaub Falcons are now the worst side in the NFL
The Giants beat the Nationals 9-0 in a blowout. You hate to see that in a baseball g– What? Football? Damn.
The team kills this year are getting out of hand
I’m back. Did Dalton throw another pick?
He did! Back to back throws.
Oh, come on! I was joking!
Is Amendola not allowed to catch balls in the end zone?
It’s in his contract with Bellichik.
Damned, non-compete clauses.
“End zone balls.” new search term?
Between Two Goalposts hosted by Fitzmagic
Safety Dance!
I shit on announcers all the time but they’re on the mark questioning a 3rd down draw and 4th down pass play for the Giants. Just garbage fire play calling.
Holy shit, Andy.
They’re absolutely going to break Saquon for a lost season
The playcalling is Ben MacAdoo-esque. Just fucking brutal.
How the hell did the Eagles beat Green Bay?
There it is.
“Whoomp?”
-Tag Team
Forgetting which hand to handoff with is a fun new quirk i didnt think id see out of andy dalton
At least he didn’t throw an interception
You spoke too soon
Over by 3:37 WOOP WOOP WOOP
Hey is this the club for people with Chase edmunds on their bench?
I’m blowing the guy’s balls off (figuratively) anyway but, yeah. That’s a #metoo
We have a NEW Lucky Pierre in zee League! Oui, oui!!
Saquondown!
that’s one tough motherfucker
How did you know I had cheap pork-chops?
I read ur e-mails obvs
Dan Bailey, I presume you remember Mister Winkles?
LOOKING FORWARD TO HOW BROKEBACK NOR GORE WILL MANAGE TO SCORE HERE
v
Damnit, I now have their ‘riding’ music in my head and can’t get rid of it.
It fits the Cincy game.
I would have thought Yakety Sax performed with slide whistles would be more appropriate, or am I thinking 9’ers and redacteds?
Andy Dalton; good point.
NO JACOBSDOWN FOAR HIPPO
“Bonus” coverage after the Wash/Niners tilt is Giants/Cards.
I assume the Crimebuster is the guy throwing the monkey at the bad guy?
Well, there are still those that think women are “of the devil.”
hey, DJ Chark isn’t ded!
If he played for Cincy I bet he’d wish he was.
Cincycide.
WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO YELL?
THE LESSON NEEDS TO BE LEARNED!
I seriously can’t believe how accurate Danny TenCent is when he’s on.
Yeah, but that on button has a serious short somewhere.
Short…..
It’s Fitzpatrick-esque.
Glad I faded McLaurin.
Saquon on 1 1/2 ankles is still bananas.
YIKES!
why did I think Matt Ryan could put up some numbers against this Rams Defense?
because you forget that 28-3 happened and changed him… Made him into a slightly more fotogenic Kirk Cousins?
Rams secondary is nothing special and he had thrown for 300+ yards every game to start the season? That was my logic.
Everbody Loves A.A. Ron!
FITCEPTIONNNNNNNNN!
real Coutee TD there
The Shield heard the hue and cry of fans annoyed by the bullshit “touching the QB” penalties. You can tell because they are calling even more, even worse ones this week.
going to mass, and hating every second of it kind of flies in teh face of reason
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvpTXZ1VjUA
where else u gonna eat Jeebus?
Tijuana?
To be fair; those were great tacos.