I Guarantee Green Bay Stays Undefeated this Week



DFO’s resident gamer of the video and board variety.

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My team is the greatest! What’s that? They’re on bye? Oh. How about a little mid-season update on them then?

The Packers are 6-0 and have the best record in the NFC. Green Bay has started a season 6-0 seven previous times, with the first six times bringing a World Championship. You’ll notice I didn’t say Super Bowl because this was back when I think there were only 3.5 teams in the league. What happened the most recent time the Packers started 6-0, in fact when they started 13-0 back in 2011?


Oh. Right.

This is why I’m not going to get all that excited about their hot start. Let’s face it, Aaron Rodgers is the best football human on the planet and makes the Packers a lock for the playoffs every year barring a catastrophic injury (I just threw up a little in my mouth thinking about that happening). So it’s the playoffs that matter.  But let’s talk about the Packers in the regular season anyway, because they don’t get much media coverage. Small town and all. Did you know the Packers play in a small town with a college football environment and are owned by the fans?

The biggest story of their 2015 season thus far has been injuries.  Fucking injuries. The Packers have six players already on injured reserve, and lead the league in missed (and anticipated missed via IR) starts by players with 78 already. Jordy Nelson, the greatest whide receiver in history has been the biggest void to try and fill. What have they filled that void with? James Jones, that guy Terry who sells hot dogs, and a broom with most of the bristles gone.



Rodgers is throwing them the ball. That’s why James Jones is tied for the league lead in touchdown receptions with six. The same James Jones who wasn’t good enough to stay with the Raiders, and was cut from the Giants this spring. Even so, this team is ranked 20th in passing offense and tied for 11th in total offense. Add to that a banged up Eddie Lacy and the offense has understandably not been the dominant force the league is used to seeing. So the reason they’re 6-0 must be the…defense?

The annual Fire Dom Capers into the Sun campaign has taken a bit of a hit this season. Although the team is a mediocre 17th in total yards allowed, partially from letting Marmalard eviscerate them for 500 yards last week, it is second in total sacks. It’s coming up in big moments with big plays, and a plethora of different players are blasting the opposing quarterback.

And look at Green Bay’s remaining schedule. Once they get past Ol’ Noodle Arm and Glory Boy the next two weeks, it’s four straight games against their laughingstock divisional “rivals”.


Defense playing well enough to help win games? Overcoming a seemingly overwhelming injury bug? Aaron Rodgers? It’s…it’s starting to feel like 2010. But no, I won’t let….I can’t….

IiiiiiiI YYyyeeaaahhh.. WE’RE GOING 16-0!




DFO's resident gamer of the video and board variety.
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Moose -The End Is Well NighBrettFavresColonoscopyMarc Trestmans Windowless VanDoktor ZymmMikeWallaceAndGromit Recent comment authors
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You’re right, but still go fuck yourself.


Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I wasn’t on board til you were self deprecating. I am on board with you rooting for a 15-1 season and a playoff loss. Sorry, still a Bears fan

Doktor Zymm

While I’m fairly indifferent to the Packers, I will never stop loving that MST3k gif.


I think the Vikings game is your only realistic shot at a loss. Last games of the regular season typically don’t mean shit and AR probably won’t play.

That’s a much better 18-1, though.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I believe they will kick the Broncos’ asses. The score won’t be that drastic, something like 23 to 17, but they will lead for most of the game. There, I feel better now.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Have you seen the Packers or the shell of Peyton that remains? It will be 49-14 with the only points coming from James Starks fumbling twice and having them returned for TDS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Ah yeah, watched all of the Donks games and three of the Packers. Sorry, but the Denver defense is one of the best right now. With the Donks O-line and the Packs’ pass rush I can see several sacks, a couple of INTs and a defensive score, but also a few Rodgers sacks and two to three of their own turnovers. The Donks D can keep them to two to three TDs, and a few FGs.


“Ol’ Noodle Arm? I…hmm…this gives me an idea.”

[dials phone]

“Hi, is this Cup O’ Noodles? I think I have a business proposition for you…”

– Peyton Manning’s agent

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Not enough profit in Ramen.

Old School Zero

I could buy into your prediction, but I think the Panthers game is going to be tough, and the Cowboys that late (and maybe healthy) could pose an issue.

I’d still rather the Packers win the SB than any other team currently in contention, though.