Iron Cook with Low Commander: Leftovers?! Scramble!

Good afternoon, denizens of debauchery. I am here to tickle your taste buds as our own Yeah Right enjoys a week off from being a mad kitchen scientist of epic proportions. This week, I am going to share with you the fine art of the ultimate lazy Sunday morning breakfast, passed down to my by my father: The Leftovers Scramble.

Now, I know what you are thinking: “Haven’t I already done this in college or when the wife/girlfriend/parole officer is out of town?” Sure, but there’s a little more to it than just taking whatever is left in your fridge and cracking an egg on top of it.

Well, I mean, yeah, that’s mostly it, but the art is in the preparation, and that starts during the week. Whenever you go out or make something at home, if you’re full, don’t just keep cramming food into your maw like a Colts fan. Save it! Put in a bag or box and most of the time it can last a few days in the fridge. I’ll walk you through two different scrambles that I did last weekend. Here are all of my leftovers for the first:

  • A couple of pieces of breaded ahi from a sandwich
  • A chunk of gyro meat that fell out of the pita
  • A spear of pineapple that was close to getting too old
  • 2 different kinds of onions
  • French fries from lunch

It drives me nuts going out to lunch with friends and seeing them throw away a bunch of fries! They make the perfect crunch or easy hashbrown alternative to any scramble. If you learn anything from me today, I hope that it is this: Get your fries to go, goddamnit!

Anyway, take what you have, dice it up into bite size chunks and toss it in a skillet turned up to medium heat.

In most cases, your leftovers are going to be already cooked. All you want to do here is simmer them up, maybe caramelize somethings like the onions or toss a little oil on top of everything to get a nice fry. While all of this is going on, get out the only thing you went and bought just for this meal: some eggs! If you’re eating alone, 2-3 eggs is usually plenty. If you’re entertaining, add 3 more per person. Just make sure you have a bigger pan and enough leftovers to cover everyone.

So, go and crack open and start beating those eggs. Beat them good, like they remind you of an NFL owner who took away the ONLY TEAM you ever truly cared about and has lead you to now hate the ENTIRE FUCKING SPORT that you once so–

Huh? Oh, sorry, I think I blacked out there for a second… And it looks like I’ve cracked another bowl… Oh well.

[Tosses bowl into teeming pile]

Make sure you pick out the pieces of plaster or glasses and pour the eggs into the pan after reducing the heat a little bit. Scrambled eggs are best when cooked slower on a lighter heat, as they can burn with the quickness if you’re not careful.

I generally like these dishes more on the omelette side of things, so once the bottom and sides of the eggs solidify enough, I just grab a spatula and flip half of it over onto the other side. If you’re going to add any cheese that you want inside, toss that in right before doing this. After 2-3 more minutes, flip your scramble onto its other side, turn off the heat and plate it up when ready.

Mine didn’t turn out quite as sexy as I was hoping, but god damn did it not matter. The onions cooked up perfectly to compliment the sweetness of the pineapple, the spice of the gyro meat and the fish provided the main sustenance I needed to get going. And of course, the fries to solve that everlasting potato craving. This was wonderful.

Okay, for Round 2, I got a little more creative. I went out to a taco shop the night before, and when I couldn’t finish my burrito, I grabbed a few extra things as I knew exactly what I was going to do the next morning.

  • Carnitas from a burrito
  • A slice of lime requested from the taco shop
  • An extra to-go container of he verde salsa from the taco shop
  • Half an avocado already cut up
  • A few corn tortillas
  • More fries!

I pulled apart what I could from the carnitas and sliced up the fries for the pan. The oil from the carnitas was pretty heavy, and I wanted to cook a little bit of that out. It was nice, as it got the fries crunchy before tossing the egg on top. After following all the steps above and getting the eggs nice and solid, I diced up what was in the pan, tossed it on a tortilla and added all the fixings. Here was the outcome:

Save your food and you too can eat like a king again the next day! All it takes is a little forethought and the willingness to only dirty one pan and a bowl for the eggs, It doesn’t get much easier than this!

What’s that? You want to know the weirdest things I’ve ever scrambled? Let’s see… I’ve cutup a slice of pizza and tossed it in with some teriyaki rice for something that was pretty memorable. Of course, there were some goddamn fries in there too!

So go out there folks, raid your fridges, let nothing going to waste! If it’s expiring soon, throw it in the pan and scramble an egg on top! You never know how great it might actually be until you try.

Leftovers: It’s what’s for breakfast.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers is a native North County San Diegan with an affinity for the Padres, beer, whiskey, punk rock, video games and the end of days. If you eat a fish taco with a fork in his presence, you may lose your hand.
Subscribe
Notify of
29 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
JerBear50

I’ve always chucked leftover fries too but I really like that idea. I have to ask though, what kind of people are you allowing in your life that would encourage you to eat breaded, fried ahi? Do you wash it down with a Pappy and Diet Coke? The taco shop fry-up sounds fucking killer though.

laserguru

There are many elements of this comment that are awesome.

JerBear50

Yeah, I can see how you’d make that call. If it’s questionable quality then fried is the safest route to go.
One of my favorite spots to jam at is a hardcore redneck dive bar on a river. You’d never even know it was there if you didn’t know about it. They have a big annual tradition where they have a giant oyster roast. Mind you, this place doesn’t even have functioning toilets in the men’s room. They don’t flush. They just sit there until someone opens a valve to empty them. The bar is only operational because it’s old enough to be grandfathered in and not subject to code. Not a chance in hell I’d eat an oyster in that place. Not a single fucking chance.

Brick Meathook

This is great!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Brick Meathook

– – audibly gasps – –

theeWeeBabySeamus

You spelled “audibly ejaculates” wrong.

laserguru

Once again, I don’t take these free Sundays lightly. It gives me a chance to cook the old favorites. Since its hot as balls I’m grilling some pork chops, making a spinach salad and we’re having one of my easy as fuck guilty pleasure side dishes. Ricearoni!

Don’t judge! I’m sure everyone has a quick and easy side dish they enjoy.

Still eat the dollar box of Kraft Mac and cheese?
Go crazy!
We still will occasionally do the Kraft Mac and cheese and some boxes of fish sticks.
There were 4 of us a few years back who were completely stoned and pounding beers and between the 4 of us we ate 113 fish sticks.

I have zero guilt!

ballsofsteelandfury

Yeah Right is a gay fish?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Here, hear! Saves food waste, saves money….. also great mix for hangovers; eggs, cheese, onions….and……

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

For Round 3, Buddy found a 40-year old Reggie! bar, some sausage, some stale Wendy’s fries, and then added eggs.

It’s called the “My Father Was a 1970s Drunk” frittata.

Spanky Datass

Fuck yes!

Also, any kind of leftover pasta with sauce and meatballs, chicken parm etc. makes a damn tasty omlette/scramble.

laserguru

I really like the “winging it” element here. One of the old cooking shows I used to watch recommended throwing away your cookbooks. While that seems a little extreme it does lend itself to more creativity.

And when the Sunday Gravy cookbook comes out – eventually – don’t throw it away!

Thanks for the break Mr Commander.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Hooters found a way to stop that though, they just tell him it’s the “Two Minute Warning” and he stares at his watch.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yeah, I crashed on your couch. Didn’t see this yummy stuff waiting for me when I woke up tho.

You’re a bad host.

😉

theeWeeBabySeamus

Especially considering I kept my promise and didn’t get so inebriated I wandered into your room for that sweet Low Commander ass.

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

ballsofsteelandfury

We should all follow your example and stop wasting food.

Now, given that, how the fuck did the pineapple taste with the fish?!? I would think you have to make sure it’s a non-stinky fish, right?

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m proud that you did not go for a vagina joke there. If it was tWBS, different story…

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh sure. Take down the open thread with my witty(?) comments, now talk junk about me.

Magic Pussy my ass!!!!!!!!!!!

Hehehehehehehe

ballsofsteelandfury

actually, i didn’t take it down. Someone else did.

Btw, why are there no emojis for “magic”?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Because you touch yourself at night when you think no one is watching.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

TAKE IT DOWN, take it down, or just take it down?

JerBear50

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The was a place that put chunks of pineapple in their fish tacos…. at first I had the same reaction, until I tried it; they were fucking great.