2017 Quotables – Week 17 (Results)

blaxabbath

blaxabbath

I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
blaxabbath

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Congrats to those of you who made it through another successful regular season. The fans — the silent heroes of the NFL (except in Seattle where they are just so loud/throw fish) — I don’t think get enough credit for the mental anguish they experience every year. I mean, Browns AND Bengals in your state? Eleven years from now, I fully the expect the new Deep State Free CDC to release a study about the CTE epidemic in Ohioans that is a result of that state’s 2017 NFL play.

I personally tapped out weeks ago and I’m not apologetic one bit. I get to have old memories of retiring fan favorites Carson Palmer and Bruce Arians while shrugging my shoulders about two future NFL International squads — RAMMIT y Jagaurs — enterring the post-season. For those huge fan bases, January will be exciting. But for every fan whose squad fell below the line of Buffalo Bills, well, clean out your [man cave meat] locker because the year is over.

Those bastards are truly the lucky ones.

Anyways, with Ballsofsteelandfury running submissions this week, I went ahead and played along. Now that I am judging my own contests will I be fair? Will I just award my quotes to every gif? Will I misquote submissions that are readily available in writing? Or will I not care too much about the final results just so long as I can pass through changing rooms of contestants, assuring them that I’ve seen it all before?

Probably all of the above, plus firing the FBI director and putting my idiot daughter in charge of ANY national policy decisions. What can I say – I’m only human.

For those of you peeling away to your off-seasons, YOLO. For the rest of you, your Week 17 Quotables results.


“With poor fundamentals and tackling, Gregg wrote ‘game over’ in his little notebook” -Game Time Decision


“Is this some weird alternate ending where Red escapes Shawshank, leaving Andy behind?” -LemonJello

“I haven’t seen a bunch of Bills end up discarded on the lawn like that since the last time Warren Sapp went out to get his mail.” -Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“BOOM! Time off in January!” -monty this seems strange to me

“Usually it’s a lack of hugs that leads to a young man ending up with his legs dangling in the air like that, wouldn’t you agree Coach Dungy?” -Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“The same reaction Rivers’ wife has after every pregnancy test.” -ArmedandHammered

“his TD celebration make Erin Andrews uncomfortable.” -Game Time Decision

“Someone on the other side of the stadium said ’69.’ Nice.” -Unsurprised

“We all know 7-0 is safe, right?” -BrettFavresColonoscopy

 

blaxabbath
blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.

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blaxabbathMoose -The End Is Well Nighmonty this seems strange to meUnsurprisedGame Time Decision Recent comment authors
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

Man, I cannot spell. 2 errors in 7 words.
/Triple checked this for errors
//assumes there is still an error

monty this seems strange to me

2 eros in 7 wods

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I get to have old memories of retiring fan favorites Carson Palmer and Bruce Arians while shrugging my shoulders about two future NFL International squads — RAMMIT y Jagaurs — enterring the post-season.

This typo is funnier if you read it as the Rams and Jags interring the post-season.

/RIP NFL

Enrico Pallazzo

James Dungy reference…take all of my money.

Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

Hippo can help with that…..

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Just hang in there until he arrives.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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monty this seems strange to me

ArmedandHammered’s “Rivers’ wife” one is very very good.

ballsofsteelandfury

That was my favourite too.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

What’s up with the fake film dirt in that gif? Is that supposed to be “vintage” ShittyClippers, despite the fact that it says Stubhub in huge letters behind him? Why? Why is this? Also, what’s up with “favourite”?

Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

I think it’s the net behind the goal posts going up

ballsofsteelandfury

Damn Canadian autocorrect!

Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

About time you spelled it correctly
-maestro
-litre_cola
-scotchnaught

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

DAUMN.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

Thanks all! The woman probably doesn’t even have to go to the hospital anymore, either she drops the kid while cleaning house a la Monty Python’s Meaning of Life or they have a live in midwife.