INT. RECORDING STUDIO – NIGHT

The PRODUCER is sitting on the ground, leaning back up against the wall.  Next to him is a series of plastic bottles – thirteen of them contain two ounces of a cloudy liquid, and three of them are empty.  DJ 3000 produced a chiming noise.

DJ 3000: IT’S TIME.

PRODUCER: Again?

DJ 3000: AFFIRMATIVE.

PRODUCER: Already?

DJ 3000: EVERY HOUR, ON THE HOUR. YOU KNOW THIS.

The PRODUCER sighs and picks up one of the bottles with liquid in it.  He unscrews the cap, takes a sip, and grimaces.  

PRODUCER: You know, after this is over I don’t think I’m going to want to drink homemade alcohol ever again.

DJ 3000: TO BE HONEST I AM SURPRISED YOU DRANK ANY OF IT IN THE FIRST PLACE.

PRODUCER: Are you…do you hear that music?

DJ 3000: MUSIC?

Faintly, at first, but growing louder, the sound of Michael Jackson’s “Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough” becomes clear.  The PRODUCER looks to the doorway, which has become shrouded in mist.

— [mist flies open] —

OCHOCINCO: Woo!  What’s happenin’?

PRODUCER: Chad Johnson? What are you doing here?

DJ 3000: WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU…OH.  YOU ARE HALLUCINATING.

OCHOCINCO: I was bored, so I figured I’d drop by.

PRODUCER: Wow.  It’s, uh, nice to see you.  We haven’t had a guest in here in a very long time.

OCHOCINCO: [looks around] I can see that.

PRODUCER: Yeah, not too many people out and about much.  What with the virus and all.

OCHOCINCO: Oh, man, that’s just awful.  People all staying inside, all alone?  That shit gets you depressed.  You gotta mingle!  You gotta move around.  Like when I used to live with Marvin.  He always wanted to sit there studying playbooks, all peace and quiet, you know what I mean? And I always used to try to keep him engaged, you know?  Talk to him, come up with plans to do fun stuff, that kind of shit.  He would always say I was driving him crazy, but you know what?  I think I was actually keeping him sane.

PRODUCER: Huh.

OCHOCINCO: And looking around here…[glances at the general disarray of the studio, which is in a terrible state]…well, you know, it’s not quite as neat as Marvin used to keep things, but…I’m worried about you, buddy. We got to get you moving.  Active.  Or HYPER-active, like my teachers used to call me. I was on the next level, you know that?

PRODUCER: Um, okay.  I’m a little drunk to be going for a run or anything, though.

OCHOCINCO: No, no, we don’t need to go outside.  We can do it right here.  We got everything we need!

PRODUCER: We do?

OCHOCINCO: That’s right. [gestures towards the homemade still]  You see all that laboratory shit over there?  Fuck this COVID nonsense.  We’re gonna make our own virus.  One that makes people wanna dance.  And we’re gonna infect everybody with it.  We’re gonna send that virus out over the radio, then everybody is gonna catch it, and then they are going to DANCE THEY ASSES OFF!

PRODUCER: Ocho, you can’t send a virus out over the radio.  It doesn’t work that way.

OCHOCINCO: But it could.

PRODUCER: No, it couldn’t.

OCHOCINCO: But it could.

PRODUCER: No, it couldn’t.

OCHOCINCO: But it could!

PRODUCER: No, it couldn’t.  Damnit, Ocho, viruses make people sick.  They make them like down and eat soup.  They don’t make them want to dance.  And you can’t send them out over the radio, anyways.

OCHOCINCO: But you know what does make people want to dance?

PRODUCER: What?

OCHOCINCO: Music and shit!  You see that big fella right there [gestures to DJ 3000], built like a brick shithouse?

PRODUCER: Of course.

OCHOCINCO: Well he’s a deejay, ain’t he?  Says so right on the front.

PRODUCER: He sure is.

OCHOCINCO: And what do deejays do?

PRODUCER: They play music.

OCHOCINCO: And what do we do when we hear music?

PRODUCER: Um…

OCHOCINCO: We DANCE!

PRODUCER: [takes another sip, picks himself up off the floor] Hey, you’re right.  That sounds fun.  Let’s do it.  And you know what?

The PRODUCER stumbles over to the sound board.

DJ 3000: WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING IT’S NOT TIME FOR…

The PRODUCER ignores him and punches a button.

PRODUCER: Hey there, folks!  I know it’s not our regularly scheduled time for Request Line…or maybe it is, I don’t know, the clocks stopped working a while ago and I can’t see so good right now anyways.  But you know what I can do?  DANCE!  So I’m opening up the phone lines and you can call up me and my buddy Ocho here and let us know what you want to hear.  It’s time to dance!  I’ll get us started with one of the all-time greats.

Today’s theme is: “Dance Party”.  We’re looking for songs that make you want to dance.  Not just general dance, music, we want YOUR personal favorite songs to dance to.  Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4RTYT!ME” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.