Request Line: The Ultimate Tom Brady Mixtape

While most of us hate him with a burning white passion, it’s hard to deny the magnitude of Tom “Marvolo” Brady’s impact on the National Football League.  That’s why we’re going to scoop up some of the residual hate left over from 2020 and apply it to the construction of a mixtape commemorating Tom Brady’s life and career.

Below, I’ve compiled a list of some of the key moments and periods in Tom Brady’s history.  Your job is to choose songs to represent these.  It’s by no means an exhaustive list; if you have another incident you think belongs on this mixtape, please add it (along with your song suggestion, if you’ve got one).  It’s probably best to think of this as an offseason version of Quotables, where quality matters much more than quantity and the liberal use of the +1 button is encouraged.  Feel free to keep adding over the weekend and into early next week.

• Childhood in the Bay Area as a front-running fan of the Boston Celtics, the Los Angeles Lakers, and the San Francisco 49ers.
• Attends the University of Michigan, where he is buried in the depth chart behind Brian Griese for two years and then starts as a junior and senior.
• Drafted by the New England Patriots in the 6th round of the 2000 NFL Draft (199th pick)
• Drew Bledsoe is injured and Tom Brady takes over the starting job.
• Tuck Rule
• Leads game-winning drive to beat the Rams in Super Bowl XXXVI.
• Abandons a pregnant Bridget Moynahan to begin dating (and later marry) supermodel Gisele Bündchen.
• Becomes involved with alternative medical practicioner Alejandro “Alex” Guerrero.
• The Patriots’ bid for a perfect season in 2007 is disrupted by Eli Manning and the New York Giants
• Bernard Pollard destroys Brady’s ACL and MCL in a preseason game.
• Deflategate
• Displays a MAGA hat in his locker and implicitly endorses Trump for president.
• Brady drops a key pass and is strip-sacked for a game-deciding fumble by the Eagles in Super Bowl LII.
• Splits with Belichick and leaves the New England Patriots to sign with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
• Leads the Buccaneers to become the first ever team to win the Super Bowl while playing in their home stadium.

Next Friday, I’ll compile the mixtape into a single track for us to enjoy, and I’ll announce the  topic that we’ll be requesting songs for on the following Friday (with the expectation that things will quickly devolve into something like the Pre-Taped Call-In Show).  Have fun!

NOTE: Banner image via: https://fineartamerica.com/featured/tom-brady-art-painting-joann-vitali.html