Request Line: Cancel Culture

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

Cold open into the DFO studio, where DJ 3000′ is cheerfully chatting with the week’s guest, who sits in the studio with the ON AIR sign clearly visible.  Everything seems pretty much normal, except for the disco lights…

DJ 3000′: …AND SO ONE OF THE PROBLEMS WITH THE MODERN INTERNET IS THAT IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND EVEN THE MOST RUDIMENTARY INFORMATION WITHOUT RUNNING INTO PAYWALLS.

BILL PARCELLS: That’s okay, I think the disco lights are kinda neat. You know I was going to spend the year of 1979 in New York City, right?

DJ 3000′: FOR REAL?

BILL PARCELLS: Yeah, Ray Perkins hired me as his defensive coordinator. The wife wasn’t so keen on it though, too much nose candy and brown sugar around that scene.

DJ 3000′: YOU MEAN, UH, AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN?

BILL PARCELLS: Oh right, I forgot that you’re not supposed to call those broads that anymore. You can still refer to them as “black” though, right?

DJ 3000′: YEAH, I THINK THAT’S STILL OKAY.

BILL PARCELLS: But they can call themselves [redacted] but I’m not allowed to.

DJ 3000′: THAT’S RIGHT COACH, YOU DEFINITELY SHOULDN’T USE THAT WORD IN PRETTY MUCH ANY CONTEXT OTHER THAN AN ACADEMIC DISCUSSION.

BILL PARCELLS: I tell you something kid, do not get old.  Everything changes and people forget all about you.  Why just last week I was at a Giants event and Steve Tisch mistook me for Bill Clinton! Asked me who’s running the scene now that our friend Jeffrey offed himself – and then he winked a bunch of times.

DJ 3000′: COACH PARCELLS I CAN PROMISE YOU THAT OUR LISTENERS REMEMBER YOU AND STILL APPRECIATE ALL OF YOUR CONTRIBUTIONS TO THE GAME OF FOOTBALL.  IT’S AN HONOR FOR YOU TO JOIN US.

BILL PARCELLS: I’ll be straight with you, the real reason I came here today is because my buddy Freddy Biletnikoff told me you could connect me with a kid who mows lawns.

DJ 3000′: WELL SURE AS IT TURNS OUT…

BILL PARCELLS: A white kid.

DJ 3000′: I SUPPOSE THAT HUNTER WOULD QUALIFY AS SUCH, YES.

BILL PARCELLS: Thank heavens. Because those [redacteds] I use now keep robbing me.

DJ 3000′: COACH PARCELLS I ASSURE YOU THAT YOUR HISPANIC GARDENERS ARE NOT STEALING YOUR GARDEN GNOMES. I’LL BE HONEST COACH I’M FINDING YOUR LANGUAGE A BIT SURPRISING AFTER THE INCIDENT IN 2004. THERE’S NO INFORMATION ABOUT ANY PUBLIC TRANSGRESSIONS OF THAT NATURE SINCE.

BILL PARCELLS: Yes, I’ve learned to keep any racist comments behind closed doors, where they belong.

DJ 3000′: UM, COACH PARCELLS, YOU DO REALIZE THAT WE’VE BEEN BROADCASTING LIVE TO THE WORLD FOR THE LAST FIVE MINUTES?

BILL PARCELLS: Wait, what?

DJ 3000′: OH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT THE PHONE LINES ARE LIGHTING UP WITH WHAT MUST BE REQUESTS FOR SONGS EVEN THOUGH WE HAVEN’T ACTUALLY INTRODUCED THE TOPIC YET, WE SHOULD PROBABLY DO THAT.

BILL PARCELLS: [looking lost] Topic?

DJ 3000′: OKAY FINE I’LL COME UP WITH IT MYSELF, LET’S DO…CANCEL CULTURE. WE’RE LOOKING FOR SONGS THAT ARE NO LONGER CONSIDERED SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE FOR WHATEVER REASON. SONGS THAT SPARKED SIGNIFICANT OUTRAGE AT THE TIME THEY WERE RELEASED ARE ALSO ACCEPTABLE, AS WELL AS SONGS THAT ARTISTS THEMSELVES HAVE TURNED AGAINST. I’LL GET US STARTED WITH A LITTLE OINGO BOINGO.

Today’s theme is “Cancel Culture” – helpfully suggested by Yeah Right and DJ Taj and combined with an ancient suggestion by…Cuntler, maybe?  We’re looking for songs as described above – no longer socially acceptable and/or have been disavowed by the artists themselves.  Please post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0w_G_L0u6aN!5” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  Last week’s puzzle of “Waterfall” by The Stone Roses was chased down by SonOfSpam and I really wish someone would return to the fold and put him back in his place.  Merry Christmas I mean Happy Memorial Day!