[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio

Log In

May Day Eve Recapmas Open Thread

King Hippo

/

,

I can’t bring myself to care about the minutae of Denver’s 5th and 6th round stuff.  They ain’t draft the puinnter out of JV Bolmen!! which is sad.

General Takeways from Sportsball:

  1. A placement specialist AND TWO PUNTERS got draft before U*NC “alumnus” Sam Howell, who now joins Li’l Danny’s Commie Dumpster Fire.  Satisfying.
  2. I am glad they quit playing Lesser Footy, aren’t you?  Though outside my Bubble of Denial, I am pleased with the Men of City machine. Just wait until the 2140s, shit really starts to take off.
  3. I noticed my own stank just now, like it was the middle days of the #NuAIDS zombie apocalypse.  Descending into madness ain’t FOAR the faint of heart.
  4. At least GAMBLOR still lowers itself to talk to me.
  5. Still waring my Donks/Obama hybrid shirt (see above), until Round 7 ends.
  6. Have not watched one single inning of el beisbol, and don’t miss it one bit.
  7. FITBAW HR weekend is ending, now comes the 4-month wait.  Assuming the Rooskies don’t nuke us on 9 May.

And that’s really that.  Good luck signing your priority FAs tonight and tomorrow.  There’s no reason for me to wake up and put myself through the Chelski match, but I know I will.  Self-hatred requires careful watering.

5 5 votes
Article Rating
Tags:

Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of
70 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
BeefReeferLives

Jus logggggd in to say tht your creamsicle ginger kittteh is totes adorbs, hip. with a kittteh as cute as that who needs duiladid??? (yeah, i kno YOU AANDS ME)

2
Brick Meathook

I was down at Long Beach today and you won’t believe what this truck does in front of this flare tower. I was just in the right place at the right time I guess:

https://vimeo.com/705010708

0
yeah right

My turn to watch The Batman.
I liked it. Great cast first of all. I’ve enjoyed Paul Dano in everything I’ve seen him in. It was solid.

What I really liked, a lot was We Own this City on HBO Max. It’s what David Simon does best. Goes back to Baltimore. Some familiar actors and characters from The Wire and it’s 6 episodes. Saw the first one and I am all the fucking way in.

Last edited 3 years ago by yeah right
0
Redshirt

Well, poop. This doesn’t look good. At least Bill Murray is steering into the shitskid and not hiding behind BS apologies.

Bill Murray Gives First Comments on Inappropriate Behavior Complaint: ‘It’s Been Quite an Education for Me’ (msn.com)

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
0
Redshirt

Political Correctness has canceled this scene from “The Waterboy”. Are we not allowed to make fun of the KKK now?

WaterBoy Derek kicks field goal – YouTube

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

They’re called the republican party now, and free speech is only about them being able to say whatever they want

1
Redshirt

Sorry for getting tears on the + button.

0
herodotus450

Titanic, now theres another classic vehicle movie

2
Doktor Zymm

I really needed my doing nothing day yesterday, nothing like breakfast, wine, nap, dinner, wine, bed for a full recharge! I feel human today instead of like an exhausted pile of yuck.

5
JerBear50

And what worldly port do we find you in today?

2
Doktor Zymm

Mostly at home for once!

0
JerBear50

Still SF? Been awhile.

0
Doktor Zymm

Just a couple weeks, I’ve been back and forth to Chicago a lot. I’m cutting back on the weekend trips since I’m horseback riding both Saturday and Sunday now.

0
King Hippo

I had that lovely nap, but it was just like hitting the pause button. At 48, I have waaaayyyyy given up on ever having energy again.

0
scotchnaut

Youngest son loves vehicle-centric movies but had not seen the Bullitt chase scene until today. How does this happen?

2
SonOfSpam

Canada finally got VCRs?

5
scotchnaut

[sends a very nasty response via semaphore]

7
JerBear50

comment image

5
scotchnaut

This skit never gets proper credit as one of the best ever. I don’t get it.

1
JerBear50

The whole episode is pretty solid. I think it probably gets buried because of the Inquisition sketch. Although, I’m sure you expected that response.

Last edited 3 years ago by JerBear50
3
Redshirt

Betamax – Wikipedia

3
WCS

comment image

3
herodotus450

Has he seen Apollo 13? That’s a vehicle.

1
Redshirt

I saw the command module for Apollo 11 when it was at the Union Terminal in Downtown Cincinnati. Had my father did his job and distracted the guard, I would’ve had that thing attached to my trailer and it would be my mancave.

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
1
yeah right

You need to show him “Sorcerer.” William Friedkin, Roy Scheider, music by Tangerine Dream. One of my favorite vehicle movies ever.

1
Brick Meathook

https://vimeo.com/341216783

Last edited 3 years ago by Brick Meathook
0
Redshirt

Watching “Beauty and the Beast” as a grown up isn’t exactly the same when watching as a kid.

The enchantress punishes a young, arrogant prince for not giving her shelter in the storm by turning him into a beast? Okay. One, he’s a teenager, you can’t ruin a teenager for one act of asshole. If that’s the case, no teenager would make it to adulthood. Two, why would true love break the spell? She just wanted out of the rain, not betrothed. Finally, why were his subjects punished with him? Were they cheering his actions? No one deserved to suffer that hell because their regent is an asshole; especially the poor souls who became the toilets.

The townspeople ostracizing Belle for being such a bookworm really aged well into 2022.

Speaking of with, Gaston really aged well in 2022. Belle is America and Gaston is the Trumpublican Party. Democratic Party is The Beast, a selfishly amoral entity that needs to discover its capacity for change, growth and acceptance before the final rose petal falls and we’re all doomed. Non-Trumpers like me are the aforementioned les toilettes.

If Belle is so smart, why doesn’t she trick Gaston into going to the castle alone instead of with an army. “Oh, Gaston? I’ve fallen in love with you and I found this castle we can live with that is so worthy of a man like you.” “You are right, Belle. I am worthy of a castle.” (one carriage ride later) “Who’s that dangerous beast? “Oh, yeah right. I almost forgot. He’s my landlord. Hey, Beast? Can you kill the guy?” “On it.”

Why couldn’t Beast just invite Belle’s father to stay with them in the castle instead of releasing her to go back to the village? You can drag him back to the village but you can’t drag him back to the castle?

And of course:

♫♪♪
Noooooooooooooooo Onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnne
Misogynistics like Gaston.
Overcompensates like Gaston.
Ooses toxic masculinity like Gaston!
♫♪♪

2
SonOfSpam

Democratic Party is The Beast, a selfishly amoral entity that needs to discover its capacity for change, growth and acceptance before the final rose petal falls and we’re all doomed. 

Whatever you gotta tell yourself to justify your upcoming vote for JD Vance, I guess.

5
Redshirt

Hey, I voted early and I didn’t vote for JD Vance, that carpetbagging, douchebag who insulted my ancestors of hillbillies. I threw my vote away on Jane Timken. I figured I should reward the real person who kept Ohio red and not Agent Orange. That’s also why I voted for Mike DeWine. If you worked to save me and my family from not dying due to the pandemic, you deserve the chance to at least go to the Finals and not lose in the Semis.

In hindside, I should have voted for Matt Dolan as he’s the only non-Trumper, but when I asked Google “which Ohio Senate candidates are non Trump”, my phone started crying. It is a bit disconcerting.

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
1
SonOfSpam

Yeah, sorry…I forget sometimes that Ohio is a little different.

0
scotchnaut

I understand-some residents still use ‘carpetbagging’ as a descriptor in 2022.

0
Redshirt

Pre-Trump Ohio:

We won’t change anything to make things worse, but we won’t change things to make things better! Just sit down, shut up, grab a beer and watch TV.

0
JerBear50

Any chance of Vance ever setting foot in a coal mine, it’ll be because someone dumps his fucking body in one. So hopefully soon.

3
Redshirt

I’m willing to bet cash money he hasn’t been 10 miles from the interstate highways. Three-figures says he hasn’t set foot in Southeast Ohio.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Alls I know is I took a girl to see Beauty and the Beast in the theaters in college and got laid.

3
Redshirt

I saw in the theatre with my family. Thankfully for me, my family and my therapist, this is where our similarities end.

4
Sharkbait

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99SS9aZjrhY

2
scotchnaut

/watching any band’s documentary

In Their 20’s: “It’s all about the music-kill me if I’m still doing this when I’m 50.”

In Their 50’s: “We owe it to the fans. They love us sooo much.”

2
SonOfSpam

Rams signed a free agent kicker tonight, so the two kickers on the roster are:

Gay and Dicker

4
Redshirt

I know Gay Jokes aren’t kosher in 2022, but this is entrapment!

1
scotchnaut

Spam turned into a 50’s Jewish stand up comedian performing in The Catskills so slowly, I hardly noticed.

2
SonOfSpam

Just reporting facts.

/flaps dickey
//realizes the Rams are about to sign “Flaps DIckey” as their longsnapper

0
Gumbygirl

Gay amd Dicker, the Fabulous Kickers! It’s sooooo LA, I fucking love it!

0
herodotus450

Damn, just when I thought I had an original idea, it turns out that Dave Letterman-Julia Child coupling has already been done. You win this time universe!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7SOxM4P7cw

1
rockingdog

Found a funny;

Wes Anderson should STOP making movies and START designing high concept putt putt courses in the myrtle beach area

0
King Hippo

I (rightly) shit on the quality of Amercan Lesser Footy, but Pittsburgh Riverhounds is a badass name.

1
scotchnaut

Oh! Forgot about this scene-a very cheeky shoutout to Clint’s spaghetti westerns.

0
scotchnaut

Watching Kelly’s Heroes because I could use some positive waves, man.

3
King Hippo

wutchyew talkin’ bout, Willis? I was not able to Make Fetch Happen with Baker

0
scotchnaut

“Hey buddy, I admire the effort. You’ve rolled that out so many times but you just couldn’t make it happen.”

-Sisyphus

Last edited 3 years ago by scotchnaut
2
2Pack

Have a little faith baby

0
King Hippo

Bearistocrats! have drafted the Wolven Sort’s punter. HUZZAH!

0
WCS

comment image

0
King Hippo

There’s been like 4-5 punters drafted. I find that fascinating.

1
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XxHRydG2fNU

0
scotchnaut

My guess is that the value of punters is finally being quantified and leg strength (he can kick another 5 yards further than our current guy!) does matter.

1
King Hippo

Brett Kern, trailblazer

1
Gumbygirl

Kruger needs a scritch.

1
WCS

comment image

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Reposting from the other thread to get more eyeballs and because Herodotus’s advice, while obviously expert and helpful, was nearly unintelligible to me, an internet moron.

Today’s adventure was trying to get FiOS installed based on the previous owners telling us they have fiber and then learning from installer #2 on day #2 that we do not have fiber and would have to tear some shit up to run cables in the house. So back to fucking Xfinity.

Any advice on routers/modems? Can I use any mesh network with any modem/router to extend my signal? I’m an idiot on the things so feel free to talk down to me (as long as you’re also being helpful).

0
Brick Meathook

Sounds like you need your balls waxed.

3
herodotus450

Forget what that moron said and just buy whatever’s at Costco. If it breaks or doesn’t work, you can return it no problem!

1
ballsofsteelandfury

I would consider making this decision like a CEO. Meaning:
Don’t get in the weeds
Figure out your budget
Do a cost-benefit analysis
Make a choice
Get someone to do it for you.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

And Brick is right. Get your balls waxed.

Last edited 3 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
1
King Hippo

In theory, ball waxing sounds great. But I am afriad…it might move.

1
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

I’ve got an Asus ( i think ac2900 ) and it’s been good. When we were in lockdown there were 4 of us on the interwebs all day and night and nary an issue. If you have a really big place it will do the extend or mesh thingy too but the one we have doesn’t need any help as it covers our house (2 stories) without problems.

My IT network friend also said to look at TP-link as they are good too.

You “should” be able to extend any network but some brands play better with others, so I’d stick with the same brand if needed.

And we upgraded as the cable companies cable modem/wireless router is a POS and has as limit of 20 connections at a time. There were also dead spots in the house too. I figured it need to extend as well but the new router don’t need any help.

A trick i did was when i got the new router was to name the new network the same as the old one, so all of the devices just reconnect. And then rename the old network something else. Saves trying to update the network name and password on a zillion devices.

4
70
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x