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"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio
Things happened in college football, I don’t know what those things were since I binge drank and passed out. It looks like it will be another blueblood playoffs. If it comes down to Ohio State-Bama, it will just damn about nullify all the good things about this season.
Updated 506 maps: Week 10 Maps
As for Carl, he picks Panthers-Titans
Carl is 4-5 on the year, better pick up the hustle if you want make the playoffs bald man.
On another note, for all my spinal-challenged friends, I finally got to the sweet spot: 1500 mg of gabapentin and I can stand up without a lightning bolt going down my right buttcheek.
“Pay how you want for what you want* with Visa, the official credit card of the NFL.”
*Except streaming individual games online, because fuck you.
So I find out this morning that there is a family thing I gotta attend. Originally scheduled for last weekend, when I had already committed to blowing it off with a lie so that I could stay home and drink and watch JV Footy, it got cancelled because my pussy assed family members were afraid to drive in the rain to go to the facking thing.
So, as I said, I find out this morning that they’ve decided to short notice it for today b/w 2pm and 7pm.
(sidenote…this also napalms my early evening college basketball plans. Which actually might be a good thing if Friday was any barometer….but I digest…)
My mind is racing for another believable lie, but I’m coming up empty and running out of time.
For the first time, I am missing my desert solitude. And that’s depressing in and of itself.
You have an intervention to attend…for a friend.
Not bad. Only they’d be unlikely to believe it wasn’t for me.
In fact, maybe that’s what today is all about.
Oh shit.
“I’m at the mechanic. I really hope is the alternator.”
Get the sweet spot in phrasing dejection and resignation, and a sympathetic family member might also throw a few bucks your way. I’m told.
This might be the winner. I like the possibility of thrown bucks.
HAVE to stay home and masturbate or your tubes will be clogged forever and the back-up will soon kill you?
*Not good at this.
Too pathetically close to the truth, I’m afraid.
ESPN’s talking about Greg Hardy.
There’s a surprise.
/reaches for remote
Gents, I wish you a good day as this fucking volcano in Bali has emptied my wallet and am bound for australia by carrier pidgeon. At this rate I will be hitting up Nigerian princes for their money when I get back to the cold country. I hope you all get the derp you love and crave today while I am on something called a Silk Air as Jetstar and Virgin can go fuck themselves with their no refunds.
Day ;late and a dollar short but I hope you bought trip insurance. My aunt got stranded in Europe when that Icelandic volcano went up a few years back and essentially got a week’s extended vacation at no charge.
I should contemplate trip insurance. But I’m pretty sure a war breaking out is a “force majeure” type of thing that would void the coverage.
When I was living in Syria and Israel attacked Lebanon, were were told to get the F out of the region, so I got a week free in Istanbul (within a stone’s throw of the Blue Mosque) as a result. If trip insurance covers war, I might to to Lebanon again for Christmas.
Gents, I wish you a good day as this fucking volcano in Bali has emptied my wallet and am bound for australia by carrier pidgeon. At this rate I will be hitting up Nigerian princes for their money when I get back to the cold country. I hope you all get the derp you love and crave today while I am on something called a Silk Air as Jetsar and Virgin can go fuck themselves with their no refunds.
The broadcast maps just remind me of how stupid the NFL is with the Sunday Ticket monopoly. I’d gladly pay $10-15 for a high-quality stream of the Bears stumbling around in St. Louis, but I don’t get that option. All I can do is get a low-quality pirated feed online and the NFL makes $0 off of me. Or maybe I’ll take my daughter to the bar and watch on one of their screens while I nurse a shitty beer and my daughter plows down their free popcorn–what’s the NFL’s cut then?
Seriously, NFL, allow fans to buy streaming access to games on an a la carte basis, and you’d make a ton. What revenue stream do you think would be threatened by this? It’s not like any of your broadcast partners would argue–they’re so happy to carry your games they pay billions for the privilege.
/rant
I’m surprised you expect the NFL to be rational.
They have coolies and negros shoveling cash in large denominations into the NFL boiler right now, why change?
I dunno. Being a guy who lives in central Ohio and is very meh about OSU, I think the nightmare scenario is ND-Alabama.
I hate Ohio State slightly more than Notre Dame.
See, I can’t hate any team more than I hate Notre Dame, so I’m incapable of understanding you.
ND-Alabama is a dream scenario because you bet a ton of money on ‘Bama and ignore the spread. Because Saban will run that fucker through the roof.
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