Your “WAKE UP, IT’S TIME FOR FOOTBALL!” AFC Championship Game Open Thread

 

GENERAL: Mr. President, Agent Scotchnaut is pinned down in Bucharest and can’t post the Open Thread this afternoon!

PRESIDENT RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: [pulls up pants] I’ll handle…wait.  This seems familiar.

GENERAL: He’s getting 418’d!  THERE’S NO TIME!

PRESIDENT RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Fine, fine, sheesh.  You know, when my Russian handlers coerced me I signed up for this job of my own free will I didn’t realize I was going to have to work weekends too.

Okay, so we’ve got the Seahawks.  Oh, wait, no, Green Bay.  Oh, wait, no, this is the AFC.  Goddamn, why can’t I remember anything that happened to me last night?  It’s like I didn’t get any sleep at all.  My brain feels like a big bowl of clam chowdah.  As far as this game is concerned, against my will (which seems fitting), I’m rooting for (and picking) the Steelers.  The Patriots defense hasn’t been tested in any meaningful way, and I think the Steelers are going to be willing to sacrifice a good 45 yards worth of field position to take cheap shots at Tom Brady and ruin his cadence at the line after he loses his voice screeching at the officials.  But you’re not here for hot takes (mmm…hotcakes) – you’re here to make jokes.  Get to it.  Make with the laugh laugh!

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

So… go Falcons?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

THANKS OBAMA

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Mr. Ayo

Filthy animal probably didn’t have adequate ACA coverage last year.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

USED THE EXCUSE THAT PAWS DID NOT ALLOW HIM TO USE KEYBOARD TO SIGN UP!!

http://68.media.tumblr.com/da193e11fe477c7c863ee4b6db4cafca/tumblr_ojj202O5Is1r7gjrwo1_540.jpg

Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo

They’re very good boys.

Brick Meathook

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Did anyone else buy an Amazon Fire Stick that goes to stock image screensaver mode in like 5 minutes if you pause? I only ask because there is one image that I swear is the inspiration for a big scene in FFX and was wondering if anyone else noticed it. I won’t give you the image description because you would know it if you saw it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

(Nationwide jingle)
Lunchmeat garland looks so good…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Hello darkness, my old friend…

Mr. Ayo

Hello friends!

laserguru

Dear US citizens who live east of California.
We just got our ass kicked by the biggest storm I’ve seen since 1998.

Prepare your anus. This motherfucker is serious.
And it’s a cold bastard too.

You’ve been warned.

Unsurprised

Fuck ’em

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Sorry. Global Climate change that causes years of drought and then 12″ of rain doesn’t exist. We are in Trump’s Merica

Senor Weaselo

Padre Weaselo went to NAMM and mentioned flash floods so they had to divert the flight home. I’m guessing it’s that one?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Well, tonight was further proof that life isn’t fair and if there is a God, she hates us. Night all.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Mr. Ayo

Poll:
How many of these children went into porn?

I say 2.

Unsurprised

As adults?

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