2016 Quotables – Super Bowl (Results)

blaxabbath

blaxabbath

I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
blaxabbath

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Like most blax #content, 2016 Quotables is going out weakly, sadly, and off schedule. But for that, as with all things, I blame the Falcons.

In this case, blame the Fallon.

But I’m not going to be sad that 2016 Quotables — one of the few highlights of my 2016 NFL interest — is over, I’m going to smile because it happened. What will be in store for in 2017, I can only guess. Probably 3D Holographic Quotables (somehow made possible because of Cox internet). Or, more likely, some kind of forced-theme Quotables, since that seems to be how you get fat Americans away from their televisions anymore. Maybe Star Wars Quotables? Or Pokemon Go II Quotables? Emojis-Only Quotables?

Hey — remember when live games used to do the kiss cam and they’d always end by showing like two coaches of the opposing team chatting in the dugout or whatever and it was always funny? Now it’s like an NCAA violation to have your assistant coaches set up coeds to bang football recruits on even unofficial visits.

But I digress…

Thanks to all of your who basically took care of generating quality #humor for my posts this season. It’s really allowed me to hide my recent not-crippling-but-still-unusual-for-me level of not-positivity. Instead, I get to be like, “Yeah! I did come up with ‘I’d be worried, usually when signals are this mixed, someone ends up sleeping with a transvestite.’!”

Anyways, onto your first ever Quotables results of an overtime Super Bowl!


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“A withered old Republican tosses a pittance at the feet of a minority? How is this newsworthy?”-Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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“Angelica… Eliiiiza… AND GRUMBLE.” -Senor Weaselo 

Note: I read that in the tone of Mambo Number No. 5. I’m not sure if that was the intention but it’s what made it so funny to me.


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“Ms. Bundchen, I’m sorry to tell you this, but Marky Mark has left the building.” -Enrico Pallazzo

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“… and off in the distance, they heard the cry. ‘Whoooo stole my golden arm?’ They sat silent, tremoring, and listened with fear as it drew closer. ‘Whoooo stole my golden arm?’ They welled with fright as they heard it again, this time directly behind them. ‘Whoooooooo stollllleeeeee my golden arm…. WAS IT…. YOU?!?!?!?!?'” -JerBear50

Washington Huskies student section during a game against UCLA.
“We call this one ‘the Eminem’.” -Cuntler

This should be the only week in which we do commercials.
“The fuck? What are they putting in these Skittles now?” -LemonJello

Possible tummy. 5/10. Would not bang!
“Lady Gaga died on the way back to her home planet.” -Curse of Marino

blaxabbath
blaxabbath

I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.

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LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

The week I dominated Quotables like Giselle over Tom Terrific with a shiny new strap-on is still the highlight of this NFL season for me.

Fun Fact: Giselle’s shiny new strap-on is named “Vibranium.” It’s even etched onto the shaft!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You could do a periodic Quotables of weird current sports gifiage just for teh funnies.

Good work this week AGAIN peoples.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Game Time Decision
Member
Game Time Decision

quotables is the first post that sorta brought me out of lurking. Not sure if 6 total comments qualifies for not lurking or not.. Going to miss these posts
Great work

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Member

As with Steve McNair, I’m sad to see quotables go. Even if I got robbed!

Don T
Member

/pours out a coffee for McNair

//resets for weekly the Outlook reminder of No Mistresses

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I had that on my calendar too, but when one lives in the desert, one doesn’t need reminding of thirst.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo
Member

I knew making all the Hamilton jokes would pay off eventually!

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