Request Line: Involuntary Servitude

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

A pair of radio professionals are busy setting up the studio for the afternoon’s show.  A large piece of electronic equipment is directly outside the studio door, appearing to peer inside.

DJ 3000: …ALL I AM SAYING IS THAT GIVEN THE NATURE OF MY EXISTENCE I WOULD BE A PERFECT HOST FOR THIS TOPIC.

PRODUCER: [exasperated] Enough with this already!  I get your point.  Please give it a rest and stop bugging me.  We’ll get you on the air soon enough.

CONNOR, THE INTERN: [connects final plug] We’re good here.

PRODUCER: Great.  Now if you could just get some sweet tea brewed up before…

— [door flies open] —

JERRY RICHARDSON: Gentlemen.

PRODUCER: Ah, Mr. Richardson!  So glad you could join us.  Have a seat. Can Connor here get you something to drink?

JERRY RICHARDSON: Certainly!  I will have a Polynesian Pearl Diver, do not spare the rum.

Connor heads off towards the kitchen, googling the recipe on his phone.

PRODUCER: We’re short on time, so let’s get started.  You’re ready?

JERRY RICHARDSON: Indeed, boy.  Let’s have at it.

PRODUCER: [goes live to air] Good afternoon, and welcome to another edition of Request Line.  I’m here with Carolina Panthers owner Jerry Richardson.  After making a splash with first round pick Christian McCaffrey, you must be excited about adding to your haul as the draft resumes tonight.

JERRY RICHARDSON: I am a seasoned sla…ahem…franchise owner.  So I’ve been down this road before.  It’s fun, but it doesn’t set my blood a-boil like it would a younger man.  I do very much enjoy a good draft, however.  I thought in celebration of this momentous occasion the topic for today’s Request Line might be “Involuntary Servitude”.  Whether it’s being drafted for a football franchise, drafted for the honor of serving your homeland, or just being required to sacrifice your time and energy for the benefit of an institution that provides you with nothing other than food and shelter – you know I’m a trustee at Wofford College, no? – please give us a call with your requests, and this gentleman here will be so courteous as to give them a spin for you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXzK0AFpmcI