2018 Quotables – Week 2 (Results)

blaxabbath

blaxabbath

I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
blaxabbath

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I have nothing to say that has not already been said. It’s definitely been a lemonade-out-of-lemons week here at [DFO] and, while I don’t know about the rest of you, I’m off to go drink. Enjoy your Quotables results below.


“Bill Gates prefers Clippy as the ELITE face of Microsoft.” -BrettFavresColonoscopy

 

“‘/Watches form /cums /Performs 1,000,000 circumsicions as atonement’ -T. Tebow” -nomonkeyfun

“Vontae Davis is always taking things so literally.” -Enrico Pallazzo

“THIS CLAY MATTHEWS, I CALL HIM A FRUSTRATED ALABAMA UNCLE, CAUSE HE’S BLATANTLY TRYING TO FUCK COUSINS!” -LemonJello

“‘Awesome catch! Now run three consecutive long-developing pass plays that lead to sacks!’ – Kyle Shanahan” -Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Walked in on Archie and Olivia doing it.” -Game Time Decision

“This tendency to swerve into oncoming traffic is why I always make a point of not driving on the opposite side of the freeway from Sam Darnold.” -Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Sometimes I really don’t believe Ciara’s first pregnancy was from God, but I don’t wanna say anything or she won’t let me touch her boobies again. Man, this relationship stuff is HARD.” – SonOfSpam

 

blaxabbath
blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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Brocky

Really great effort guys, those eli ones were the fucking best

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Clippy jokes are never not timely

Wakezilla

Ya know, I missed the quoteables thread, as well as one or two others. I find this confusing.

Did this happen to someone else, or do I need to eat some cookies?