2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: Second Round, Day 7

Senor Weaselo

Senor Weaselo

Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn’t doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn’t happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
Senor Weaselo

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The round’s almost over, so dance break!

And then we shall be down to 16, a full round ahead of the real one! It all comes a-barrelin’ to the end of the month. In addition, a couple notes on what’s coming up in April—the filming of BattleBots Season 4, which means we’ll have another BattleBots Beat. I’m not gonna get into the full of it, but we know there plan to be 67 competing robots this season, up from last year’s 56 55. Some notable, uh, notes, in this which I’m calling a BattleBots Byte.

A second Brazilian team is joining the fray, Team Ua!rrior, who are known for their lower-weight bots in RoboGames (which isn’t running at all this year), with Black Dragon. It’s an “eggbeater spinner,” which is drum-like.

Team RoboChallenge, best known for King of Bots champ Spectre, bring another crusher, named Quantum. This must mean BattleBots and the next televised season of King of Bots are filming at different times, and it looks like that is correct—BattleBots will be mid to late April, King of Bots is in May. That’s still tough to have two bots in fighting shape a month or so apart.

I finally get a hometown team to root for! Brooklyn squad Bots FC, who had Blue in King of Bots, brings Shatter to the party. That’s a hammer-bot, of which there seem to be a lot more of this year surprisingly. Someone’s got to fill the void, as Chomp will not be around, since she’ll be doing “emergency babysitting duty” because Zoe Stephenson (I assume) is pregnant! Congrats!

Team Carbide will have another entry—they’ve won Robot Wars with Carbide and the King of Bots-adjacent This is Fighting Robots! with Tungsten, so whether they compete with Cobalt or have a new entry remains to be seen. Interestingly, Tungsten was NOT approved for King of Bots Season 2, as the Chinese show clamped down a bit on international teams, but you would’ve expected they’d have Tungsten in after its showing. (The above-mentioned Blue was also one of the not accepted teams.)

Speaking of, we will have our first Chinese team in BattleBots, with Wan Hoo.

Team Nightmare returns! However, Jim Smentowski will not be competing with flagship Nightmare, but his other main robot, Breaker Box, which in addition to having its breakdancing lifter plow (video not found) boasts what Jim said might be the biggest hammer in BattleBots, among other weapons (he said 5 interchangeable ones). The role of giant vertical spinner will be filled by newcomer Mammoth and the returning HUGE!.

Among the teams not returning, I mentioned Chomp already, but it seems that Red Devil has retired as Jerome Miles returns to King of Bots with Dragon King. Even more surprising, Team Equals Zero Robotics will not be returning with Overhaul, the first time the bot will not be competing. After last season’s dismantling, it looks like Icewave is out as well. BETA is also not competing (and no word on Tánshé for King of Bots). Stinger is still out as well, and it seems that last season’s dome-breaker was the last hurrah for Team Razer, as Warhead will not be competing. (Ian Lewis will probably be a judge on King of Bots.)

Derek Young will be returning as a judge, and will be joined by Jason Bardis, as this season the judges will be former roboteers.

That concludes this BattleBots Byte. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Second Round, BOLTMAN Region

  • 3. “Wow, free porn?!?!?!? Are they also giving away a free email address and 40 hours of AOL?” (56%, 18 Votes)
  • 11. “I’ve got Rivers on the bench for FF, which just goes to show you that, like Rivers himself, you should never pull him out.” (44%, 14 Votes)

Total Voters: 32

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Second Round, BOLTMAN Region

  • 10. “I haven’t been this anxious for a period to start since a broken condom scare junior year of high school.” (69%, 22 Votes)
  • 2. “I’ll take one poster, a beer coozy, a bottle opener, and a pack of HRTN condoms – because nothing says ‘appropriate DFO branding’ like a condom named ‘Hard Ride to Nowhere.’” (31%, 10 Votes)

Total Voters: 32

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So that will do it for the second round. Tomorrow—16 start to become 8.

Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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LemonJelloBrettFavresColonoscopyOld School ZeroHoratio Cornblower Recent comment authors
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Old School Zero

Double condom action! Just like when I boned your disgusting mom!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hey, you came back! Unlike our disgusting dads.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m not sure what I ever ordered on-line to make this ad keep popping up but it does and it’s starting to wear me down. I think I’m gonna order one of each.

https://tpc.googlesyndication.com/simgad/15554724696396507382?sqp=4sqPyQQ7QjkqNxABHQAAtEIgASgBMAk4A0DwkwlYAWBfcAKAAQGIAQGdAQAAgD-oAQGwAYCt4gS4AV_FAS2ynT4&rs=AOga4qlOWrEqz9GjD3ONAAtMLoVzw7HwKg

Horatio Cornblower

Ooh, we got a battle in the 3-11 game! I sure hope Tom Izzo can keep from beating the shit out of one of the players if it stays this close!

LemonJello
LemonJello

“I’ve got some special treatment techniques I’d like to try on any injuries.”
-L. Nassar

LemonJello
LemonJello

THIS GUY SENOR WEASELO I CALL SKYNET BECAUSE ALL HIS TALK ABOUT FIGHTING ROBOTS MAKES ME THINK THE END OF HUMANITY IS APPROACHING!