Hi everyone and welcome back to the Beat! Last time out, Tombstone broke everyone’s bracket projections by catching on fire, Death Roll broke some more projections by possibly sidelining Quantum and moving to 3-0, and Cobalt did not break more bracket projections, just its front wedge attachment and Bombshell’s dreams. But now it’s midseason, and that means that back by popular demand it’s the Desparado Tournament! As recalling last year, the Desperado Tournament is an eight-bot bracket where bots with less than stellar records feeling like they need a Hail Mary to get into the championship can enter. If they can win the tournament by way of winning three fights in fairly quick succession, they’ll receive a Giant Bolt for their troubles and, more importantly, an automatic ticket to the championship bracket without having to compete in any more fight nights. Your robotic octet (but not roboctet), in order of seeding:

(1) Minotaur (0-2)
(2) WAR Hawk (1-1)
(3) Black Dragon (1-1)
(4) End Game (0-2)
(5) Gruff (1-1)
(6) Captain Shrederator (0-2)
(7) Ragnarök (0-2)
(8) Lucky (0-1)

My big question regarding the seeding is really just Lucky vs. Ragnarök. Ragnarök should be the 8 seed, I mean in its two fights it lasted a total of 1:26 (44 seconds to Monsoon, 42 to Valkyrie). I mean yes, Lucky lost to Bloodsport, but at least it lasted three minutes. Or at least one minute. Apart from that you could argue flipping Gruff and End Game, but that wouldn’t matter because they’d fight each other either way, it’s the 4-5 matchup. Before we get to that we still have fight backlogs, so let’s do that:

Episode 6 bonus fight: Petunia vs. Marvin
Petunia: 0-1 (L, KO 1:51 vs. WAR Hawk)
Marvin: 0-1 (L, JD 3-0-0 vs. Gruff with Gemini)

If you told me they planned this fight out immediately after learning Hannah Rucker would be competing with her own bot, with this name, and with a team name like Team 42 Robotics, I’d say, yeah, probably. I mean, us nerds do like our Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy jokes. So we’re gonna call this one the Battle of Magrathea.

I actually wanted the clip where Zaphod yells “Magrathea!” a whole bunch but I couldn’t find it. Ah well. More important clips.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsK6aRuSBIc

The movie was kinda… okay I guess. Nothing special. I’m not sure they needed Zooey Deschanel as Trillian, but Alan Rickman did the voice of Marvin so 10 points for that. They’re apparently working on a TV show for Hulu which will not have Alan Rickman as the voice of Marvin (rest in peace), so minus several million for human mortality.

Onto the robots, Petunia couldn’t really get around to get purchase on WAR Hawk and paid for it, losing by KO after enough hits knocked it over to the point it couldn’t self-right. Marvin lasted three minutes, but did absolutely nothing against Gruff and Gemini on account of the teeth flying off its disk after the first hit. For this fight Marvin actually started from an inverted position, to avoid the plastic portion of the robot from being in the line of fire, instead having the giant aluminum billeted part. I think it’s just a superior angle as well because now Marvin becomes more of an undercutter, and its disk in the standard position is awfully high for the teeth to land hits on—well, when they stay on.

It looked pretty decent, as Marvin was steady enough to not be bouncing up and down, and the teeth were getting some sparks from this way. But Petunia’s wedge was definitely strong enough to take that kind of punishment and just work on trying to drive around to the side and back of Marvin to get a squeeze, and do that it did. Hannah asked how long they can pin for, and the answer is 30 seconds, just so we know. Thanks editors for showing the ref on the other side let Petunia know! As the 30 seconds ticked away, Petunia finally released and did get a bit of a mark on that aluminum shell. It spun around to try again but Marvin was able to knock the crusher over, honestly probably just with some drive power more than weapon power. It backed away to try and re-right itself and this would have been a good time for Marvin to follow but it was unable to as Petunia got its wedge sorted.

Marvin’s weapon was able to spin up better but its drive looked slightly compromised as Petunia pushed it back deeper into the wedge, and the weapon wasn’t the most powerful as it wasn’t quite doing to much to the armor as it got grips again. When it finally let go Marvin looked like it had one wheel going good, still mobile, but definitely struggling. But Petunia was stuck on top of Marvin, which took the killsaws to separate. It gave Marvin a chance to get its weapon back up to speed, but with the diminished mobility Petunia could get behind, grab, and push Marvin to the screws, and the weapon hitting the screws took a tooth off the disk, and possibly even both. (“Oh no, not again.”) It didn’t matter as there were only a few seconds left so Petunia held on and pushed Marvin across the Box as the buzzer sounded. Pretty cut and dry decision, as Petunia wins by unanimous decision and evens up to 1-1. Back to the Desperado!

(1) Minotaur vs. (8) Lucky
Minotaur: 0-2 (L, JD 3-0 vs. Whiplash; L, JD 3-0 vs. Gigabyte)
Lucky: 0-1 (L, JD 3-0 vs. Bloodsport)

You could believe me if I told you that Lucky was winless going into this point in the season. It hasn’t had its best days, as the four-bar flipper’s best days seem to be behind it. Its best BattleBots days are actually from last year’s Desperado tournament, where it made a run to the final before losing out to Lock-Jaw, but those are its only two wins in three seasons.

You probably wouldn’t believe me if I told you that Minotaur was winless going into this point in the season, but here we are. It’s had a new drum, and it’s a heavier drum, and that hasn’t translated into more damage because it’s not spinning as quickly (remember, kinetic energy is 1/2 mv² so the faster speed would have more energy). They have ground that drum down a fair bit so now it’s smaller and hopefully can spin up. Lucky counters with a new layer of armor and front forks instead of its wedge setup that we saw against Gigabyte, and, I’m not sure if its a smaller spatula or just its puncher setup, but that. I’m guessing smaller spatula because you can still get under Minotaur when the drum’s spinning.

Lucky box rushed, as you’d expect, and it was the bull saying “Olé,” evading the rush and hitting Lucky’s side, tearing off one of the exposed back wheels, as Minotaur likes to do from time to time. And like most robots, losing a wheel hurt Lucky’s mobility a bit, as you’d expect. And Minotaur just stayed to the side, or the back, and started grinding away at Lucky, followed by a more square hit from the drum that send the flipper flipping out.

Lucky was in bad shape, as it had zero flips and was getting beaten up by the drum, but what looked like smoke started to emanate from the weapon, and Minotaur slowed the drum allowing it to cool off before charging again, this time getting the drum under Lucky to allow it to take a ride on that drum, one of the worst places to be, before getting flipped again.

Lucky was barely mobile and frantically firing the flipper, trying its version of a Hail Mary. Of course Daniel Freitas wasn’t going to fall for it, instead waiting until after one of those fires to strike, flipping over Lucky, and then stalking to wait to see if it would self-right. And as it did, timed a charge so Lucky hit the ground re-righted it met Minotaur’s drum. Yeah, that did it. Minotaur wins by KO in 1:59, and Marco Meggiolaro’s not too worried about that puff of smoke because it was the belts and not the motor. And Minotaur is back, baby!

(3) Black Dragon vs. (6) Captain Shrederator
Black Dragon: 1-1 (L, JD 2-1 vs. Texas Twister; W, KO X:XX vs. ?)
Captain Shrederator: 0-2 (L, KO 1:49 vs. Wan Hoo; L, KO 1:10 vs. Witch Doctor)

Honestly I’m not sure if Black Dragon needs to be in the Desperado because its loss to Texas Twister was so close, and I had them winning the fight, but here is the “other” Brazilian team, on the other side of the bracket. Captain Shrederator needs something to go right, and/or figure out if there’s anything they can do to avoid shorting out at inopportune times, such as any point during a fight.

Both bots spun up, and both bots made contact, and both bots went flying. Black Dragon actually got flipped over and had to self-right by gyroing. Captain Shrederator hit the wall, one of the things the Naves don’t want, because then physics becomes a fickle mistress. Black Dragon came off as the better of the two and immediately went after the Captain, sending it back into the wall and removing some teeth from the spinner’s shell, and more importantly stopping the spinning. And that was basically it. It stopped moving, then moved for a moment and stopped again. I have no idea how Tiger Claw has worked so well but Captain hasn’t, considering they’re pretty much the same robot. (And King of Bots II is now playing, I should watch it!) Oh, and Black Dragon wins by KO in 1:18.

(4) End Game vs. (5) Gruff
End Game: 0-2 (L, KO 1:35 vs. Death Roll; L, KO 2:01 vs. Ribbot)
Gruff: 1-1 (W, JD 3-0-0 vs. Gemini and Marvin; L, JD 2-1 vs. Copperhead)

If I seeded it it would have been the 4-5 matchup the other direction so we get to see what happens. End Game’s biggest issue has been its reliability, as after dishing out all those hits it took exactly one good one from Death Roll and died. And then they lost to a frog. So maybe it’s just amphibious animals. Gruff dominated its fight against Gemini and Marvin, as neither of its opponents did a damn thing. Copperhead did do a thing but it was an extremely close fight that could’ve gone either way, and Caustic Creations had a robot go pretty far last time so it’s not too bad a loss. So again, another robot who doesn’t absolutely need a Desperado appearance but hell, while you’re here just win the damn thing.

To try and get under Gruff, End Game had its forks on, and it worked on the first big exchange, as it got a big hit in on Gruff, which looked a bit off-kilter from it. But so did End Game to an extent, which didn’t quite turn this fight into a pushing match but definitely slowed down the pace of it. Gruff might have actually had the better time of the drive, as End Game looked off-balance a fair bit, gyro dancing when it turned. And this hurt as Gruff could get under End Game and take it to the screws, but it also helped it as Gruff went to try and lift End Game but the Kiwi bot avoided it by gyroing out of the way. I’m pretty sure it was accidental but it worked.

There was a big hit between the two, and though it was weapon on wedge, End Game got the worse of it and lost a weapon belt. It has redundant belts so it didn’t effect the weapon spin, just more of its control of not being able to not-gyro. Which also came into handy, because then Gruff pulled a Lock-Jaw, and by that I mean it got a fork stuck in a killsaw port, and even if End Game would, it couldn’t get to Gruff to capitalize. But the count started as the seconds ticked down and the question was whether they’d make the bell or if the floor would win yet another fight. And your answer is End Game wins by KO in 2:59. Now, I think they would have won anyway (damage 2-1 because maybe the flames had something to do with End Game’s drive?, aggression 2-0, control 1-1) but that was a fight that deserved to end a better way than that. Eh, take it and move on.

(2) WAR Hawk vs. (7) Ragnarök
WAR Hawk: 1-1 (W, KO 1:51 vs. Petunia; L, KO 1:36 vs. Hydra)
Ragnarök: 0-2 (L, KO 0:44 vs. Monsoon; L, KO 0:42 vs. Valkyrie)

Before the fight (since I actually got to watch the episode) Jenny Taft had an interview with Donald Hutson, last year’s Desperado winner. He noted that you need to trust your crew, since no team is an island, and the nice thing about winning it meant that he could sit by and do some intel instead of having to sweat it out. The vet thought about entering this season but ultimately decided against it.

Let’s be real, WAR Hawk is in this because of the loss to Hydra. Even though it’s a good robot and therefore not a massive loss, the way it lost was pretty bad considering it was a flipper breaking a robot into three pieces. Meanwhile Ragnarök’s had about as bad a season as one can have, losing in a hit or two both times, a veritable Murphy’s Law for Tim Rackley and crew. We haven’t seen the axe fire once because it hasn’t had a chance to. They’ve added some forks to the wedge to prevent another spinner’s momentum bouncing upwards into the gears.

The good news. first, it didn’t die in one hit! The better news, the axe fired! The bad news, it didn’t do much of anything. It looked a bit like Shatter!’s hammer firing in the Witch Doctor fight, where a speed controller died mid-fight and it turned it into a break. They showed some video in the test box of the axe firing and it works, even if it didn’t look like it had amazing power. It had some moments to fire away but WAR Hawk looked pretty unaffected as WAR Hawk chipped away and chipped away.

WAR Hawk was able to get around to the back which looked like it could have done something to Ragnarök’s drive, but the wedge was able to push WAR Hawk to the screws. Unfortunately it kept pushing right onto WAR Hawk’s weapon, did a flip, and died. Tim ain’t even mad. Sadness riot. WAR Hawk wins by KO in 2:45.

Chalk in the first round, onto the semis.

(1) Minotaur vs. (4) End Game

Minotaur had its heavier drum for this fight, but were convinced that they’ve fixed the clearance issues. End Game wanted to box rush but it was clear from the jump that something was up, since it couldn’t, meaning Minotaur could get the drum up to speed, and separate End Game’s wedglets from its rest of bot. And then it got flipped, and then stuck on the screws as Minotaur threw it up there. It was a question of whether the New Zealand bot could get off the screws, and thanks to the hazard reversing it could get off, and the weapon was still active as both bots danced and gyroed. But Minotaur maintained control, going after End Game, including hitting it off the wall. There was really nothing End Game could do in the whole fight other than try to survive, but it was futile. Minotaur wins by KO in 2:36.

(2) WAR Hawk vs. (3) Black Dragon

This was a strange fight, as both bots went wide and circled but WAR Hawk suddenly stopped mid-clash. I’m not sure what happened but it meant that Black Dragon could push it around and toss it to the screws upside-down. And smash WAR Stop because it was there. That was it. Black Dragon wins by KO in 1:01 and sets up an all-Brazilian Desperado final. Vai Brasil!

Deep Six vs. Axe Backwards
Deep Six: 0-0
Axe Backwards: 0-2 (L, KO 1:36 vs. Mammoth; L, KO 1:26 vs. Texas Twister)

Well we finally get to see the 100 lb. bar! They had to take a motor out and add stabilizing bars to the other side, but Deep Six finally gets to fight, and that makes it already better than Raven last year. Its opponent is Axe Backwards, which has not had a good season, and after this fight needs to fight HUGE for the big robot trifecta. Mammoth tossed it out of the arena, Texas Twister lopped off a wheel, but now it has bigger wheels to give some clearance for the drum. Anything could happen in this fight!

Axe Backwards wanted to box rush, but its reaction was essentially NOPE. Meanwhile Deep Six’s job was to not gyro to the point it knocked itself over. Bonus, land a hit that sent Axe Backwards flying. Bigger bonus, a second shot on Axe Backwards that lopped a wheel off. The wheel on the other side of the impact. And you could tell that because the impact split the drum. That’s some power. No idea if it can do that against a bunch of robots, like anything with any sort of speed where the answer is driving in a serpentine pattern or circles around, but if it hits watch out! Deep Six wins by KO in 1:01.

And with that…

Desperado Tournament Final: (1) Minotaur vs. (3) Black Dragon

The battle of Brazil, as Rio de Janeiro’s RioBotz and Minotaur take on Itajubá’s Team Ua!rrior and Black Dragon. Obviously these teams know each other, and the other’s robots, and they were next to each other in the pits. To adjust, Minotaur had the chisel wedgelets with its smaller drum and Black Dragon had two front forks.

Both bots went wide and they went weapon to weapon with a long supply of sparks. Then Minotaur got the upper hand, flipping Black Dragon. Then Black Dragon got it, taking Minotaur to the screws. And back and forth they went, horns and weapons locked. One got a big hit, then the other. Who flipping who, who pushing back who.

It was close throughout but it was important to listen as well as watch the fight, because the familiar hum was missing, which meant that Minotaur’s drum was no longer up to speed. But it was still operational, as it got back up to speed after finally having some space for it. But that space meant that Black Dragon could drive and push Minotaur drum first into the wall, showing control. Time ticked away and the eggbeater was doing more work, flipping Minotaur over which re-righted, but the buzzer sounded before it could counterattack, and for the first and only time in the tournament, it went to the judges. Personally, this is one of the fights where you want three more minutes but unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. The judges had a unanimous decision for your winner, 2019 BattleBots Desperado Tournament champion, and first entry into the BattleBots World Championship…

Black Dragon!

So Black Dragon gets the spot, and I’m with the judges, since I had 2-1 in damage, 2-0 in control, and either 1-1 or 2-0 in aggression. As for the other seven robots they go back into the fray but lose a Fight Night card. As for if any of them still have a chance, I don’t know how the bubble will look this year of course, but in terms of plausibility, you could make a case for Gruff (now at 1-2) but I think it would have lost that fight either way, you could make a case for WAR Hawk (now 2-2) with losses to Black Dragon and Hydra, but neither of those losses were competitive, and you could make a case for Minotaur (now 2-3) but with three losses that’s almost definitely a Last Chance Rumble scenario. Possibly for all three.

Since this week is Shark Week (ooh-ha-ha),

there is no episode (this coming Wednesday would have the bonus fight for the Desperado Tournament episode, which helps since I’m a bonus fight down due to my Wednesday schedule). We will however have the BattleBots Beat midseason panel next week, with special guests! No, if I told you who the guests were they wouldn’t be special. And then the second half of the season will start up next Friday (the 9th).

So with that, the panel will see you next week!