2019 Quotables – Week 12 (Results)

blaxabbath

blaxabbath

I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
blaxabbath

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I didn’t get these up on Friday on account of I was driving home from Tucson. Still — and I’m not naming who, Sill Bimmon — went ahead and posted my incomplete draft. Anyways, the drive home was not as bad as the drive down but, that said, this was my first real holiday travel experience (of driving more than a couple hours) and it was draining. On that Thanksgiving note, for anyone still feeling short of their holiday drama fix, I’d like to use this opportunity to plug Football is Family 3.

Anyways, it’s late and no one obviously reads these results because they were up all Friday and no one noticed that it was basically the submissions post so….yeah, enjoy your Week 12 Quotables results below.


“Maybe she could have performed at a high level hitting that piñata if she hadn’t wasted her vacation partying shirtless on a fucking boat.” -BrettFavresColonoscopy

“Looks like Ma wuz right, get’er to the game, get’er drunk, and hope we win so she is so happy and out of it I can get’er out of those pants and into the meat grinder.” -ArmedandHammered

“Let’s see, we’re down by 9, 4 minutes to go, 4th and 7 from their 9, weather’s horrible, we’ve probably only got one possession left…Yeah, field goal. Definitely field goal.” -Horatio Cornblower

“’Sign that man.’ -Vikings fans” -nomonkeyfun

“I haven’t seen this many Panthers get absolutely wrecked since the battle of Kursk on the Eastern Front in 1943.” -LemonJello

“[whistles appreciatively] – Philip Rivers” -Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Ade due Damballa. Give me the power, I beg of you. Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte. Secoise entienne mais pois de morte. Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette. Endenlieu pour du boisette Damballa!” -JerBear50

“Fall out boy. Cure. FALL OUT BOY! CURE!”-Game Time Decision

“Peters showing the proper form for dancing on the grave of your previous employer’s post season dreams.” -ArmedandHammered

blaxabbath
blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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theeWeeBabySeamus

Still — and I’m not naming who, Sill Bimmon — went ahead and posted my incomplete draft.

Frankly Blax, I’d prefer you just name me rather than to compare me to someone who wouldn’t have had the knowledge or ability to make the mistake to begin with.

I put it up. By mistake. I thought we’d already figured this out.

And I’ve already apologized for the mistake which I made. Which by the way wasn’t fully my fault. But I am the only one who apologized.

Please don’t liken me to Sill ever again.

ballsofsteelandfury

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theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, that’s not me or Sill. Well, I know it’s not me. If that’s Sill then we have bigger fish to fry.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

well now we know what he did with those patent profits.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Getting the joke vs not finding it funny are two different animals.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The problem with commenting on quotables results posts is you’re either bragging, whining, or just not as good as the others. Kinda like sex with your mom.

rockingdog
rockingdog

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A couple of personal faves:

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rockingdog
rockingdog

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rockingdog
rockingdog

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Unsurprised

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