Request Line: Potent Potables

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

The PRODUCER sits on the floor of studio, tinkering with a long piece of pipe, a bunch of empty beer bottles, and a hammer.  He loads several of the beer bottles into a cloth grocery bag, and raises the hammer.

DJ 3000: SO…WHATCHA DOIN?

PRODUCER: The stores won’t let me use my own bags anymore so I figured I’d use them for this.

DJ 3000: RIGHT.  AND BY “THIS” YOU ARE REFERRING TO…

PRODUCER: Oh.  Yeah, the whole “no sports and no beer makes [redacted] go something something.”  So I’m making a still.

DJ 3000: A STILL?

PRODUCER: A distillation column.

DJ 3000: YES, THAT WOULD EXPLAIN YOUR GOOGLE SEARCHES RECENTLY.

The PRODUCER hums to himself as he begins to smash the bottles using the hammer, and then pouring the glass shards from the bag into the piece of pipe.

DJ 3000: I SEE YOU HAVE DECIDED IT’S NOT WORTH THE TIME TO CLEAN THE BOTTLES.

PRODUCER: I mean, this thing’s going to be full of hot ethanol, can’t imagine any germs will be able to survive in this environment.

DJ 3000: THAT’S TRUE.  SO HAVE YOU DECIDED WHAT KIND OF SPIRIT YOU’LL BE PRODUCING?

PRODUCER: Probably soju.

DJ 3000: OH, BECAUSE OF ALL THAT RICE YOU ‘LIBERATED’ FROM THE 99 RANCH?

PRODUCER: Listen, if they are going to leave all that rice sitting on pallets in an unsecured area, who am I to blame for taking it?  I’m teaching them a valuable lesson about security.

DJ 3000: I CAN’T HELP BUT NOTICE THAT YOU DID IT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHILE THE LAPD WAS OTHERWISE ENGAGED.

PRODUCER: Well yeah, that’s just common sense.  You know, lots easier to social distance at 3 a.m.

DJ 3000: FOR SURE, FOR SURE.

The PRODUCER continues smashing bottles.

DJ 3000: IT’S ABOUT TIME FOR REQUEST LINE, DID YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE ANYTHING IN MIND?

The PRODUCER sits back and contemplates.

PRODUCER: You know, I feel like my focus has narrowed these days.  So let’s keep it simple.  Alcohol.

DJ 3000: VERY WELL.  SHALL I CUE UP SOMETHING APPROPRIATE?

PRODUCER: Please do.

Today’s theme is: Alcohol.  We’re looking for song about booze, but there are TWO catches – they MUST have some type of spirit in the name of the song, and you cannot request any type of alcohol more than TWICE.  Gin, whiskey, vodka, etc. Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M00nsh!ne4evr” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  Have at it!