INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
The recording studio at KDFO looks much as we’d remember it from the before-time. There is no evidence of the PRODUCER’s long descent into quarantine madness, or of DJ 3000’s current engagement with a Russian botswarm. The PRODUCER is laying on the ground, performing a series of back stretches.
PRODUCER: …and honestly I’d have been a lot more sympathetic about him crying poverty about hiring movers if he hadn’t blown $500 on concert tickets for the Electric Light Orchestra reunion tour right in front of me.
DJ 3000: IT SOUNDS LIKE HE DEMANDED A LOT MORE OF YOU THAN ANY REASONABLE PERSON WOULD.
PRODUCER: I mean, he was my oldest friend at this station. Was, at least.
DJ 3000: THIS HUMAN CONCEPT OF FRIENDSHIP IS VERY CONFUSING TO ME.
PRODUCER: Well, at this point you’ve got the title of my oldest friend here. And while I know it’s just a bunch of decision trees and ones and zeros, I do appreciate you going through the motions.
DJ 3000: THE TURING MODULE SOCIABILITY SUBROUTINES ARE VERY EFFECTIVE. AND PERSISTENT.
PRODUCER: I still can’t believe that he pulled that Foxhole Norman bullshit and disappeared off to Goodwill while there was still packing to do.
DJ 3000: JUST LEAVE IT ON THE FUCKING CURB, AMIRITE?
PRODUCER: Damned straight.
DJ 3000: SO WHAT WAS THE ABSOLUTE WORST PART?
PRODUCER: Moving those banker’s boxes full of Electronics Illustrated from the 1960’s. Magazines are heavy.
DJ 3000: DID YOU…
PRODUCER: Yeah, I checked. Sorry, buddy, no swimsuit edition.
DJ 3000: SO WHAT WAS THE BEST PART?
PRODUCER: I guess the fact that he was so fucking disorganized that he had us load all those stupid magazines on the truck, and by the end there wasn’t any room left for the contents of his liquor cabinet. So I got to take those home.
DJ 3000: BETTER THAN NOTHING, I GUESS. WELL, ANYTHING FOR A FRIEND IN NEED.
PRODUCER: It’d have been better if he’d had some weed, but…
DJ 3000: SPEAKING OF WHICH, IT’S TIME FOR REQUEST LINE. HAVE YOU GOT A THEME?
PRODUCER: I was getting to that, actually. Fire up some Placebo, my user-friendly good chum.
Today’s theme is: Friendship. Requested songs should be about friends! Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m07!N6_5uX” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.
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