OK, let’s make this quick. Thanks to something called ‘the Greenland Block’, (Zymm, while you’re stuck there anyway see if you can give that thing a quick shove and get it moving), Connecticut has been stuck in a weather pattern involving near constant, and heavy, rain and/or thunderstorms, along with humidity straight outta the Georgia swamps. Maybe even worse than Georgia, as a certain Georgia-born country star found out the hard way last night.
Anyway, the weather sucks and I’m tired and likely dehydrated. It’s 10:30 and I just got back from walking the dog, as this was the earliest I could do it and not risk his drowning, or more likely my wife not letting either of us back in the house. While strolling along, sweating in places no one should sweat in, I wracked my brain for a good draft topic.
I didn’t get one, so I just said screw it, we’re drafting offensive lines. NFL training camps start soon, right? So it’s topical!
This week’s topic will require you to make at least 5 picks. Or don’t. As I’m sure some people would say to me…
But I am running this draft, so the rules are as follows: You make 5 picks. 2 tackles, 2 guards, and a center. You must draft a right and left tackle and guard. No taking two left tackles and saying that you’re going to move him to right, or taking a tackle and saying you’re going to move him to guard. No, you’re not.
Any NFL player is eligible. No NCAA or CFL guys. They do not have to exclusively played the position they’re drafted for, but they do have to have predominantly played it.
You must draft players one at a time, waiting ten picks or 30 minutes between picks. The picks must be individual players as well. No taking ‘the 1982 Washington Slurs’ for example.
With the first pick I will take ‘The Kitchen,’ Dallas Cowboys left guard Nate Newton.
Newton was a big part of the 1990-1995 Cowboys glory years, and I always liked Nate. Plus anyone so determined to follow through on a job that they get arrested twice in five weeks with a combined 388 lbs of marijuana can probably be counted on to carry out his blocking assignments.
The rest of you are on the clock.
checked to see why Pete Davidson is trending and it’s because Sofia Vergara is single now, honestly that whole thing is a pretty funny bit.
Last pick: Gary Mullins for my right Guard.
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Yeah, I’m a Yinzer homer all right…
That’s why I didn’t bother to do this draft, other than Jimbo. There are a lot of us here!
We are legion
Gonna just go ahead an grab a Center: Brad Meester
Started and ended with a Jagura.
Recap:
LT Tony Boselli
LG Mark Schlereth
C Brad Meester
RG Will Shield
RT Bob St Clair
I got here late, so I’m only picking one: Jimbo Covert, da Bears, by way of Pitt. Our friend Jay was wrestling at the PA state championships, and Gumby and I went to watch him. Jimbo wrestled too, and we sat in the stands and made vicious fun of him because he was such a goober. We called each other Jimbo for quite a while afterwards!
Jimbo
I’ll keep this going with a back-up guard, although truth be told I probably should have taken him ahead not Nate Newton and his van o’ weed.
Patriots Guard John Hannah
I’m tired and no one is going to pick them: Billy Shaw and Ruben Brown (G) (Buf)
Right Tackle: Bob St.Clair
Was always a bigger fan of his sister, Jasmin.
She’d probably stop an oncoming rush, just using a slightly different technique.