Orks, orks, orks – Monday Night Open Thread

Per Usual: Images and links are from Lexicanum 

So last week we started going over the Orkoids faction and the different types of Orks.  Today we are going to go over what could be considered Ork society.  Orks are constantly fighting, preparing to fight, or recovering from fights (or trying to survive the attention of a Painboy).  So their society is all about the next fight and getting ready for it, plus looking for their next fight – preferring to fight non-Orks, but other Orks will do in a pinch.

Religion:  All Orks worship their gods Mork and Gork.  Mork is the god of brutal cunning and Gork is the god of cunning brutality (one hits you while you are not looking and the other hits you harder when you ARE looking).  Which leads to a lot of fights between orks because they forget which is which and it gives them something to fight over.  The orks believe that when they die they go to the Great Green if they have impressed their gods.

Economy:  The economy revolves around teef, ork teef.  Orks are like sharks, their “teef” constantly replace any lost or removed teeth.  One toof is good for a squig pie and a fungus beer.  A handful will purchase a war buggy and a bag of teef will purchase a flash war wagon fit for a Warboss.

Language: The orks have their own language, not very expressive and has a lot of loan words from Imperial Common.  No real written language, basically a bunch of pictographs.  Only real Nobz may have the ability to speak common.

Where you can find them: Every fucking where, remember they are basically animate mushrooms, so if a place has had an ork incursion, they are still orks, probably hiding while they build up their numbers.  During the Emperor’s Crusade to expand the Imperium he destroyed two different ork empires, causing them to collapse into much smaller “states”.  And since they love to fight and loot, they can travel over large distances to get to what they think will be the best fight.

Currently there are several major clans (per lexicanum):

Although it has been stated that there are many Ork clans, there are only six large and truly significant ones[1c] :

  • Bad Moons: The richest Ork clan, due to their teef growing quicker. The Bad Moons are the closest thing Orks have to a merchant class.
  • Blood Axes: Distrusted by other clans, the Blood Axes make use of “un-orky” tactics such as camouflage and even battle plans.
  • Deathskulls: Famed looters and scavengers.
  • Evil Sunz: Epitomising the Orkish love of vehicles that go fast and make a lot of noise, the Evil Sunz have a high proportion of Speed Freeks.
  • Goffs: Close combat specialists.
  • Snakebites: Staunch traditionalists, who distrust many forms of technology.

Plus some free roaming bands (per lexicanum):

Next time we will discuss what orks call technology.  Let me know if there is anything you would particularly like to know about the orkz.

For the WAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

 

 

 

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ArmedandHammered
Mid 50's geek/nerd, avid reader of Science Fiction and Fantasy, manga, Chinese Web novels, and British mysteries, cult movies are my thing (have you seen Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter?)
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Brick Meathook

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SonOfSpam

Sitting on a beach
With a gun in my paw
Staring at the sea
Eating kibble raw

SonOfSpam

Did Ohtani hit the game tying HR tonight in a game that the Angels won?

Yes.

Will I miss him more than my youth?

Also yes.

SonOfSpam

(when I say I will miss him more than my youth, I mean more than being young and in shape, not my youth as in youth that I have kept in a basement, thank you

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sorry to hear that the youth you kept in your basement passed. He will be missed. (Not as much as some other things, apparently, though).

2Pack

Evening folks

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ballsofsteelandfury

I have created a Women’s World Cup Tipping Competition!

Head here to take part:

https://www.footytips.com.au/comps/DFO_WWC_2023

King Hippo

Are “just the tip” references encouraged or just mandatory?

King Hippo

Also, can you kindly change my entry name to “Hippo’s Flaccid Tips?” I could nae figure out how to do it. I blame Australia. NOT DRUGS.

ballsofsteelandfury

I can’t edit your name but you should be able to do so.

King Hippo

It made me edit my “display name” altogether, not just name the entry. AUSTRALIA IS A TERRIBLE PLACE

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just got the email and filled out my picks. Ihavenoideawhatimdoing.gif

Brick Meathook

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Senor Weaselo

That (and Senorita Weaselo playing Shadow of War next to me) reminds me, somewhere I have the PDF of The Last Ringbearer, and I should probably read it.

BugEyedBoo

I played Shadow of Mordor a while back. Never finished it, though. I thought that that mechanic where bad guys give you skill up points if they die, but get tougher if you die, was pretty cool.

King Hippo

I try not to read those Ork terms in 70s-style “jive” talk, and fail.

Buddy of mine went inside one of those “Tanger Bible Outlets” once, said there was a Bible written in “jive.” Just imagine getting stoned and reading THAT to your college buddies.

Last edited 9 months ago by King Hippo
blaxabbath

It’s amazing that real estate in Hawaii is as affordable as it is.

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blaxabbath

Sorry — that’s a political heatmap.

Hunter Biden will never win city dog catcher in the American Southwest.

King Hippo

a monument to man’s hubris indeed

WCS

Nature just needs to pull its self up by its bootstraps and understand it belongs to MURICKA.

WCS

Better yet, Nature just needs to buy more guns to shoot the heat.

King Hippo

STAND UR GROUND against the LIBTARD NATURE!!!

SonOfSpam

Blythe is lovely this time of year.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sneaky Gitz

“They have orks in Japan?” – Bill Parcells

Last edited 9 months ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
ballsofsteelandfury

How do I sign up to be a Breast Snagga?

scotchnaut

Breast Snagga has to be the name of Shaggy’s supporting band.

WCS

I just don’t buy Baby Buster as the “close-quarters specialist” type.

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Last edited 9 months ago by WCS
WCS

(ArmedandHammered is a Stanford alum and Vikings fan)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yes, but he does happen to be one of the chosen ones, by which I mean ‘chosen to be spared from a Chinese viral bioweapon based on his heritage.” – RFK Jr