5 October 2024 – a JV NFL Eveninging

Did you enjoy the early happenings?  I sure nuff did.  Or maybe I didn’t.  I am writing this Friday afternoon.

Clemson (-14.5) at Florida State (7:00, ESPN)

This could be interesting, if the Semenholes had a quartered back.  But they don’t even have the well-below-cromulent DJ Ukelele no MOAR.  They’s right fucked.

Tennessee (-13.5) at Arkansas (7:30, ABC)

I don’t exactly smell upset, but this is a tricky matchup.  Pig Sooey will at least make you work for it this year (PHRASING), and the Vols are inconsistent offensively.  So long as they aren’t playing a MAC school.  Or…SIGH…NC State.

Michigan (+1.5) at Washington (7:30, NBC)

One of these weeks, the wheels are gonna fall off of the Michigan jalopy.  Hippo predicts it happens in Seattle, tonight.  Watch and rejoice.

Kansas (+2.5) at Arizona State (8:00, ESPN2)

I am not saying that I highlighted this just FOAR the cheerleaders.  It’s a rare afternoon kickoff in Tempe, the coeds will be scantily clad as well.

Miami-FL (-10) at California (10:30, ESPN)

You know this matchup, and the Golden Shower Bears in general, will only disappoint here.  Which is too bad, because humanity doesn’t need this Hurricanes boomlet.  QB Cam Ward is legit, though.

Guns Up!! (+6.5) at Arizona (11:00, Fox)

Late night with the Fightin’ Blax!  Don’t mind if’n ah do.  This has all the hallmarks of chaotic, late night PAC-tion, just without the conference affiliation.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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WCS

Did anyone expect Cal to actually do that?

WCS

Part of this jorb involves transferring calls to other jurisdictions. When that happens, we’re supposed to conference call until all the pertinent information is gathered.

In this instance, our caller was shitfaced and just explained how much he drank, how cool it was, and that’s why his Mazda is stuck wedged against an embankment on I376 downtown directly to a state trooper. I never had to say a syllable.

Brick Meathook

In his court defense he can testify that the only reason he said all that was because he was shitfaced, and thus get the call recording stricken from the evidence. I am not an attorney.

Unsurprised

I’d certainly try if I were him.

blaxabbath

In California, they’ll just want to make sure he’s ILLEGULL then give him a house!

Bogdanski

Oof, last few innings… not so rocking. But tomorrow shall rock again!

Unsurprised

I’m watching the 1976 Midway movie. Fucking wild.

I also have a ton of vodka now.

Gumbygirl

Gumby and I watched Conan the Barbarian and Conan the Destroyer. We are the party people!

BugEyedBoo

Come to see James Earl Jones in a fright wig as Thulsa Doom, stay for Sandahl Bergman.

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Unsurprised

Great choice. Those movies are great.

BugEyedBoo

I just finished rereading Shattered Sword. Japanese lost. Again.

Unsurprised

One of these days!

Unsurprised

It was neat recognizing the Japanese actors like Pat Morita and James Shigeta (Takagi from Die Hard).

Senor Weaselo

This will be solved with fewer conferences.

WCS

Fewer, larger conferences, broken down into smaller “divisions” that the winner of each season will play in a championship game to determine the winner…

Oh, wait…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Today would have been so much fun if last year’s BCS travesty hadn’t been the final nail in the coffin of my interest in college football as a competitive endeavor.