Well, the folks out there tell me that was the most pro football that there ever was-all 15 hours and 27 minutes of it. Here’s a great goddamn idea for the minxes that run the NFL-24 hours straight of footballing. Those of you that are competent with time zones can tell me where the games need to be played and at what time. Make it the opening weekend and start the first game at 12:01am Sunday. That should be so easy to do and suckers like us would love it.

Fallout:

-It turns out that Happy Birthday To Me celebrations took a turn towards violence for Jabril Peppers and his “on again, off again” ladyfriend. The birthday boy turned 29 on Friday and was arrested Saturday for possession of drugs (the leading contender is coke) and among other charges, ‘strangulation’. (only five times!) He just signed a nice extension and I’m sure a portion of that is going to get spent making the charges drop.

-Injuries: Nico has a hammy and that’s no good. Wr’s and pulled hamstrings just do not mix-there’s no way he’s going out there next week. Also, Aaron Jones has a hip thingy and (I think) was pulled from the game as a precautionary measure.

-The Old Grey Mare Ain’t: As was noted yesterday, Zeke is running on fumes. He had 6 rushes for 17 yards yesterday for a 2.8 ypc average. The surprising thing to me is that Rico Dowdle, though nothing special, just might be able to hold the fort with his 4 yards per rush.

-No Balls on Daboll: I ranted about it before, I’ll rant about it again. (I think Redshirt has my back here, though for different reasons) The Giants had the ball towards the end up 22-20 and ran the ball three times. Yes, the running game was working, yes the idea that they were draining the clock was valid. But you know what else was working? The passing game. Daboll comes from an OC background and he put the game in the hands of the defense like a Tom Coughlin would do. The blocked field goal/score is exciting, sure, but how the fuckballs could any coach depend on that play to put the game away?

[clears throat, adjusts pajama bottoms] Where was I? Oh, right.

To The Game!

Saints/Chiefs:

-Are you tired of K.C. yet? This is their third prime time game in five weeks.

-A reminder that they’re the only undefeated team aside from [consults The Ancient Scroll of Olaf The Jester] the Vikings? A team that pulled Darnold away from a gypsy ritual behind a 7/11 dumpster. No wait, he was directing traffic at a landfill as per his Make-A-Wish winning entry. Whoops, no. He was at a kindergarten class trying to shove a cylindrical object into a triangle-shaped hole. Whatever, I just wish him the best.

-Rashee Rice’s replacement at wr seems to be up in the air but Juju is on the outside looking in. After Rice went down rook Xavier Worthy had 74% of the snaps and Justin Watson was there with 69% [gross]

-Kamara is off to a great start (he’ll get injured again) being only the 5th player since 1950 to 350 yards rushing, 5 TD’s on the ground and 150 yards through the air at this juncture of the season.

-Mahomes has already thrown 5 INT’s-the only QB’s to throw more are Levis and Richardson.

-Thank goodness the Chiefs can throw Spags against the wall. Each game the Chiefs D has allowed less yards against them including the Chargers mere 224 last week.

Damn, that’s a wordy intro-now it’s your turn.