Your Monday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Please say a prayer for Tucker Kraft. Did you hear the news? I need exactly 5 points from him in Freezer League in order to beat Game Time Decision because I got too cute with my QB choice. I will never learn.

Fallout:

-Ja’Marr Chase just gets better every year. He’s only one TD from matching Carl Pickens’ (I liked that guy) 17 scores and just 5 grabs from tying T.J. Housh-etc’s 112 catch mark.

-The solution for the Falcons recent woes? INSERT PENIX HERE. Despite Cousins’ league-leading 16 INT’s and 12 fumbles Atlanta was still in the hunt. Talent-wise they’re good enough to be game-managed into the first round of the playoffs but not beyond that. Is GM Fontenot a rearview smartypants or did he backup into a good decision?

-Another kid that I like (not in a Gaetz way) Tank Dell is having a rough go of it. Word is that he dislocated his knee and tore his ACL-this after breaking his leg last year. His game is predicated on exploding out of his breaks (he’s listed at a very slight 165 pounds so he’s never going to outmuscle anyone) so I fear that this injury may rob him of that ability.

-Are the Bears waterfalling on good decisions? Fans of the team are of course replying in the negative but bear with me. Drafting Caleb still seems to me to be smart. Now word has it that Chicago will be the first suitor in line for Lions OC Ben Johnson (the guy that has taken Goff to another level) when he comes on the coaches market-he’s the perfect dude to mentor the young fella. If successful they’ll be stealing talent from an in-division rival. If all this comes good the division will be more top-heavy than Marika.

-Jerry Jones is sunk-costing like a boss. The Boys won a squeaker yesterday so JJ is crowing that Coach McCarthy kept the team motivated. I wish I could invent my own reality like that.

To The Game!

Saints/Packers:

-Is Josh Jacobs the NFL’s most overlooked rb? He was jettisoned by the Raiders after giving them four 1000 yard seasons and never anything below 805. He catches anywhere between 20 and 54 balls a year. What more could a team want? I guess because all rb’s are interchangeable, Mattison was going to deliver the same production. Oh my.

-And you thought you’d seen the last of Spencer Rattler in any prime time game. smh…

-Not starring for the Saints this evening? Take your pick-Emo Carr is unavailable (headed to a Cult concert?) as is Olave, Bub Means, Kamara and MVS. Ok, I threw Bub in there for giggles.

-Green Bay is a very quiet (outside Wisconsin) 10-4 what with the Lions and Vikings and their gaudy records. Beware the Pack though-they’ve won 8 of their last 10, one of those losses was by a field goal to Detroit.

Have at it.

5 4 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
237 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqKK0vZTwhg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LfKOR7Y6JN4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hM8ROlP3w-o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TgLH9umILgg
I love that this became internebz legend. My mom recorded this off TV in the early ’90s, and no one believed me about the “sanitized” dubbing.

NotShogunButShogun


I understand what you hear. Lived it. Far too long.

yeah right

That was a really happy, joyous day.

Crowded but I can still hang with the fiercest coaster heads.

It helps having extremely cool family with me.

Fuck yeah. Let’s do that Christmas thing!

WCS

There was 20 minutes or so a few year back where Spencer Rattler was the hottest high school recruit, the kind that changes a program’s direction for a decade, and the sure-thing can’t miss, no-questions-asked #1 overall pick whenever he declared.

https://www.on3.com/db/spencer-rattler-108040/

Gatoraids

best soundtrack of the season and no LDB

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gMVT0iNvaE

NotShogunButShogun

Who WAS that in the *squints*…fee…eyet?
Me. It was me. Got a truck? Learn to DRIVE it fuckface.
Weight in the back. Like your 2 ton family of two.

Senor Weaselo

Well, now that I’m back after my gig, let’s see what happened in Freezer Vod—

Oh.

ballsofsteelandfury

Yeah. SO CLOSE!

Unsurprised

THIS was the first blowout all season?

Gatoraids

game sponsored by Chipolte

Unsurprised

¡Feliz Navidad!

Brick Meathook

comment image

BC Dick

Would be all in on Lady Aikman. I like a strong nose.

Unsurprised

Miley Cyrus would’ve had that growth spurt if she never got those tattoos.

Unsurprised

Lady Joe would’ve had her own show on Fox News

Gatoraids

Can’t wait for them to do all their own stunts in Thelma and Louise 2

Gatoraids

New Orleans hasn’t been shut down like this since Prohibition

WCS

comment image

Unsurprised

“Times must, and always do, change.” – Prince Akeem.

The sequel is then about his bastard son taking over because the idea that one of his daughters could succeed him isn’t even acknowledged.

Doktor Zymm

So I guess the only question now is if the Saints get any garbage time points, although there is precious little garbage time left

Gatoraids

better chance Packers D picks up at least another 2

Gatoraids

Penix has lead my team to victory over Love

Doktor Zymm

Cynical!

NotShogunButShogun

*Qaron has entered the chat*
HA! Beat all y’all!

Brick Meathook

27-0 with four minutes left in the 4th?

The Saints just need 4 TDs, one TD per minute.

28-27 Saints beat Packers.

Redshirt

Today was the equivalent of being kicked in the stomach and then kicked in the balls.

Other than that, no complaints.

Brick Meathook

THAT’S GOOD HUSTLE

Unsurprised

That was a delightful brisket sandwich. Service was ass, and I’m sure the built-in gratuity had nothing to do with that. But now I’m just being a dick.

BugEyedBoo

You world travelers might know this. Are waitstaff friendlier here in the States, where their paycheck is dependent on tips?

My daughter has been a waitress, and she says that 1) being friendly is obviously the way to make money at that, and 2) she wouldn’t do it for $15/hour and no tips. “Job is too hard, and people kind of suck. I’d just get a job as a barista.”

Doktor Zymm

Not really, I think it’s far more cultural than money driven, some places overtipping is even insulting and those places usually have amazing service

yeah right

Completely agree with Dok.

Most service I’ve encountered elsewhere has been exceptional even without the expectation of tips.

Unsurprised

Minimum wage within the urban boundary is $16 (the state doesn’t distinguish between tipped and non-tipped minimum wage) and my Starbucks baristas are currently on strike. Compared to back home, where there was a difference for most of my life, waitstaff was definitely friendlier. It was still that way when I went back last year after 13 years. I don’t know if my home state still has a tip/non-tip difference in minimum wage.

I can’t really say about abroad because it’s been too long and I almost never went out to restaurants.

Brick Meathook

I drink Folgers instant coffee at home so Starbucks baristas can kiss my ass.

Unsurprised

It’s an excuse to go outside while being left alone.

BugEyedBoo

The last couple of Starbucks coffee drinks I’ve bought are too sweet to drink.

Dunstan

My take (filled with gross generalizations) is this:

Americans, for all their talk about egalitarianism and a class-free society, positively LOVE the idea of having servants they can order around. So service in America is based around “the customer is always right,” obsequiousness, and cloying, overly-friendly “and how are we today?” shtick.

In other countries, wait staff are considered to be professionals doing a job. They’re there to serve you, but not take shit from you or jump when you snap your fingers, or pretend to be your new best friend.

Doktor Zymm

Yeah, “the customer is always right” is BS. We let people get away with far too much shit when they should just get booted out

ArmedandHammered

Who was the blonde behind the coach? Very nice.

Unsurprised

Wrong answers only!

BugEyedBoo

Coach Rizzi’s girlfriend du soir.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Big Nose Kate?

/because by “coach” I’m implying that you meant stagecoach, you see.

Doktor Zymm

“I’ve played with a broken back, ribs, etc” is basically synonymous for being on the Raiders or Cowboys

NotShogunButShogun

My drive home in 30 minutes ought to be interesting. Time to drive like Clarkson rather than May and hope I don’t Hammond.
If you know you know

Doktor Zymm

Yay! Big man run replay!