Yes Yes Yes, Sunday PREseason Etc. Etc.

Evening. I’m in a smiling mood today because Red Zone Week 1 is four Sundays away and all hopes for the 2026 season are still intact.

There will be no replacement refs for this season, no new kickoff codicils to pore over, and everyone forgot that the Tush Push was ever a thing–a controversial thing, even. Locally, the general feeling is that 32 teams with 53-man rosters PLUS the practice squad is too goddamned much for an aging memory. But the NFL produces enough screwy results that success at gambling is at hand with only gut and recency bias.

I have absolutely no idea how to build a non-laugher fantasy roster and almost sliced a finger while cutting peppers after a WTF! when a podcast reminded me that Tua was now a Falcon. And while any team has yet to lose, I say we embrace this naive time, when disingenoUs fuckheadedness can make our spirits soar.

RELATED: Can the Titans challenge the AFC South? Hell, in my dreams, ’26 Owl champion Tits skip a White House visit to go to Manhattan, appear at the U.N. General Assembly, and shouting “You are the F*F* of world diplomacy–Do something!”, and the world is universally fixed, forever.

NFL NEWS

-The 2026 Hall of Fame Class is: Drew Brees, Larry Fitzgerald, Luke Kuechly, Adam Vinatieri, and Roger Craig. I got it from espen, all are very deserving, no notes.

-PS: Adam Vinatieri used his HoF speech to roast Peyton and Belichick. Material C+, Guts A-.

-Kyle Shanahan (1989-present [allegedly]), is “at or near full strength for a little bit and [said] that he intends to coach the 49ers preseason opener”. The espen item notes that Shanahan made an in-person appearance and spoke of his emotional growth after the incapacitating crash.

Not being glib, just summarizin’. K?

Incidentally, would it hurt streaming services to freakin’ put David Cronenberg’s “Crash” on rotation?

Hurtin’ for a rewatch since 1997. Just run Crash on streaming, which is the ONLY MOVIE EVA NAMED “Crash”. Jesucristo Dios; I watched “Midnight Cowboy” (4/5), an X-rated film, on streaming. And Crash is waaaay less objectionable than a movie featuring a likeable Jon Voight.

-QB Terry Bridgewater retires from the NFL, again. He was last seen in the Lions training camp, played last year for Tampa Bay.

NFL INJURIES

Best wishes for:

-Commanders LT Laremy Tunsil. He suffered a torn triceps and “will likely require surgery and will miss at least a significant portion of the regular season”.

-Saints G Dillon Radunz. He’s out for the season, torn ACL.

-Panthers QB Haynes King. He injured his harmstring while playing heroball in last Thursday’s HoF Game. Which I liked; can’t fault anyone for making the most of opportunities. Carolina signed QB Kyle Trask, who now faces the indignity of competing with Kenny Pickett.

FINALLY,

something about real life. Netflix is streaming both seasons of “One Hundred Years of Solitude”. I watched the first, have yet to see the second (which is the final and end). From what I have seen, it’s amazing: high production values, wonderful acting, killer scenery and wardrobe…

AND, it’s a reverent (imho) adaptation of the Gabriel García Márquez novel, the one that got him the ’82 Lit Nobel. It was the work that popularized the term “magical realism”, a writing style which mixes matter-of-factly the commonplace (a beautiful girl walking) and the magical (flowers blooming upon her passing).

[Reads the room]

Sorry. Didn’t mean to stray off to the weeds. You’re right; it’s a writing style that has been employed forever by storytellers everywhere. But in Cien años de soledad, both the story and the writing are beautiful and moving. The Nerfli adaptation is awesome.

Do recommend. For word freaks, free English translation of Cien años de soledad here